What would you do??? Is this bad?

Mom2three · Aug 11, 2008

Today I took DD (18 mo) to the hair salon for a trim. When finished the lady gave her a sucker. I held her and let her suck on it for a minute and then told her we needed to throw it away so we could go bye-bye. She was very good, went and tossed it in the garbage can and said all done. There wasn't even a fight about it. But I heard quite a few muttered comments from others in there about how mean I was and why not letting her take it in the car. I don't know about anyone else...but most any food is banned from my car. Especially suckers. I imagine that all it would take is going over a bump for that stick to jam down a little throat. Am I being too cautious? I couldn't believe the looks I got when I tried to explain this.

featherhead · Aug 11, 2008

I don't think that's such a bad thing. Next time you could save the wrapper, and wrap the sucker back up and tell her she can have it at home.

clmchrissy · Aug 11, 2008

IMO you were right, the others need to mind their own business. Of course with that said have I let my 4 yo have the DUM DUM sucker from Snip-It's in the car? yes... Even though I'm always afraid of what you said could happen.
(just adding its usually downed before we are even buckled up, but still I've made the mistake)

Jewels · Aug 11, 2008

I would have done that.

When I take DS to see DH at work they always give him suckers and I either throw them out when DS isn't looking or send them back to work with DH. DS is 4 but I would rather him not have all that sugar.

Shaunam · Aug 11, 2008

DS was almost 3 before I really let him eat or drink in the car. I think I gave him a sucker in the car once and I was so nervous he'd choke (or we'd get in an accident and it would be shoved into is throat) that I never did it again. I don't think you are mean at all! I usually just keep the candy until we get home though so he doesn't have to throw it away (if we wrap it up in the wrapper it always gets forgotten and then I have a sticky mess in the passenger seat LOL).

Basically all hard candy is banned and any other easy-to-choke-on-food is too. No straws. Other food is limited. I might give him a nugget on the way home from the drive-thru but usually I just distract him with the kid's meal toy.

Mom2three · Aug 11, 2008

She is generally so easy going about things and easily distracted that even if we weren't getting in the car and she would willingly toss it out to play or eat fruit (which is generally the case) then why not??? Besides...suckers and DD = horrible drooly sticky mess.

mommyto2angelgirls · Aug 11, 2008

my dd is 4 alomst 5 and has never eaten in my cars. on long trips she is allowed a sippy cup of water same with my youngest. i don't think that children need to eat or drink in there seats on a normal basis. i have seen some pretty disgusting seats from kids eating in them. and you can never tell what your child might choke on. i recently found out watermelon is deadly. because of the spongy type texture it can get lodged in a childs throat and be impossible to dislodge. this comes after tragidy. my friend lost her 2.5 yr old son a couple months ago.

amy919 · Aug 11, 2008

I'm not a good one to ask because I do allow them in the car. What bothers me more is the fact that they just handed her one without asking you first.

We run into this on occasion, also at the salon, at the bank, etc., but I must say that I have always been asked quietly first if it's Ok for the girls to have the candy before it is offered to them.

scatterbunny · Aug 11, 2008

amy919 said:
I'm not a good one to ask because I do allow them in the car. What bothers me more is the fact that they just handed her one without asking you first.

We run into this on occasion, also at the salon, at the bank, etc., but I must say that I have always been asked quietly first if it's Ok for the girls to have the candy before it is offered to them.

:yeahthat: My favorite drive-thru coffee shop gives out the Dum Dum suckers, and they did hand them out without asking when they first opened, years ago, but now they are wonderful about asking the parent quietly, first. H refuses them now, says she doesn't like them anymore.

Mom2three · Aug 11, 2008

I agree. It is a small town and mostly everyone knows everyone. My DH's cousin actually owns the salon...but still it would be nice to have been asked. I do on occasion let DD have a treat...usually it is in this type of situation. I am not super picky about sweets, but she would rather eat other things, fruit, veggies, crackers, and so on. It's just the safety issue and the lack of respect from others when I made the decision. DD has been known to stick her fingers into her mouth and gag herself...the last thing I need is to add a potentially dangersous object for her to experiment with when i cannot see her.

scatterbunny · Aug 11, 2008

Right, I think the lack of respect from the salon people is the worst part of it all. To think an 18mo should be just fine in the car (safety-wise) with a sucker is a big assumption on their part, too.

Yoshi · Aug 11, 2008

DD was 3 before she even tasted a lollipop

(Talk about mean) I wouldn't have even let her have it at all. I wonder what the other folks would have said to me?!

Morganthe · Aug 11, 2008

yoshiandluke said:
DD was 3 before she even tasted a lollipop (Talk about mean) I wouldn't have even let her have it at all. I wonder what the other folks would have said to me?!

ROFL!! I got you BEAT!

April 2008
I am a MEAN OLE mommy.

-- Yeppers, my dd was 4 1/2 years old before having her first lollipop.

And she only got it because I had stuck one that was handed to her earlier in the month, into my purse for a 'special occasion'. It really helped keep her calm the Hep B, pt 2 vacc. :thumbsup:

I don't know how many times I've turned down lollipops and candy for her.

1) because it would make a huge sticky mess on her hair and face and everywhere else.
2) because it's definitely a delivery system designed to rot her teeth.
3) because she has a higher than average risk of developing diabetes!
4) I don't want my child learning that it's acceptable to expect or accept candy from near or total strangers just because we walked in somewhere and they think she's cute!

yeesh

Yeah, I'd be mad -- first being unasked, then second with the biddies who think it's safe for an 18 month old to walk/carry an unwrapped lollipop around. They'd be horrified at my parenting habits, that's for sure.

Mom2three · Aug 11, 2008

Well, at least I'm not the only 'mean mom' that's comforting. We struggle with this a lot. People all have their opinions...but ultimately she is my child and I make the decisions. DH's family still doesn't understnad why we 'force such a sweet little girl' to have time outs. SERIOUSLY

Melanie · Aug 11, 2008

Suckers scare me. My kids eat most things in my car, but not suckers. I know someone who lets their just-learned-to-walk child walk around with one. I just think of it being fallen on & shoved into the back of his throat.

Back to your question-people should mind their own business. If that is what you chose to do and it's not hurting your child they should stay out of it.

bobbysgirl7103 · Aug 11, 2008

I would have done the same thing. Personally I think 18 months is too young to have a sucker that mom is not helping with. And if your driving in a car there is no way you could help her. I have let my older kids have suckers in the car, but by the time we are all buckled they are handing me their sticks because they are all done.

I personally don't like food in the car because I'm the one who has to clean up all the mess.

Mommy2Marcus · Aug 11, 2008

bobbysgirl7103 said:
I would have done the same thing. Personally I think 18 months is too young to have a sucker that mom is not helping with. And if your driving in a car there is no way you could help her.

I completely agree with this! I have let Marcus have a sucker in the car 1 time & that was b/c DH was sitting right beside him & my nephew was eating one, so Marcus got his. Generaaly he does not get them in the car. He gets them only on very rare occassions anyhow, but NEVER in the car. Exspecially considering he is RF & could very very easily choke on it & then I would have no way of helping him at all!

So if you're a mean mom then so am I!

4boysmom · Aug 11, 2008

yeah sucker and rearfacing don't bode well with me.

Mtdew@ngel · Aug 11, 2008

DS will be 4 in October and he's only have 1 whole sucker to himself. I have let him have a few licks off mine here and there but that's it. There is one barber shop that dh goes to that just offers ds a sucker without asking me. I will let him take it then tell him to put it in my purse for later. When we get to the car I let him know that he won't be eating it but can have something else when we get home.

emars002 · Aug 11, 2008

featherhead said:
I don't think that's such a bad thing. Next time you could save the wrapper, and wrap the sucker back up and tell her she can have it at home.

thas what we do - i let her suck it few times and tell her she can finish it at home - those sticks freak me out in the car!

What would you do??? Is this bad?

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