My Devious plan is actually working!!!!!

I know there are those on here who don't even have TV in the house. Well, that's not us. DD weaned from naps early and instead, as substitute, watched Blue's Clues, nature, movies, and other informative stuff from 2 1/2 years old as a daily break.

Since DH has returned to swingshift, my afternoon has consisted of
... "Is Daddy going to work yet? I get to watch TV when he leaves"
Over and over and over and over for about 2 hours.
ARGH!! :hitselfonhead:

Then there's what she is doing that almost guarantees she won't see her next birthday
"Daddy, are you getting ready for work yet?" (and 5 minutes later) "Daddy, are you getting ready for work yet?" (and another 5 minutes later) "Daddy, are you getting ready for work yet?"

Pretty soon,
:crying: :crying: :crying:
Daddy's not happy with me -- Sob, sob, sob

Then when it was time for dinner, more tears from the tv going off.

YUCK!! Too much emotional rollercoaster each day!!

With Dance camp in the morning this week and what happened on Sunday, it just seemed natural to have a tv free week for her. We've had some whining moments. But today, after she had her usual tears from my negatory, she accepted it. She didn't sleep well, so she was really fragile after class, but lunch helped a lot.

She's been playing on her own for the last hour. All relaxed and happy. I LOVE IT! No bugging daddy to leave. No nagging me on what SHE wants. It's only taken 4 afternoons to get this way too :thumbsup:
Being strict has its rewards :evil grin:

Other than keeping my mind, the ultimate goal is to implement TV as a reward, not as a matter of fact, that's what we do in the afternoon nonevent.

Anyway, I needed to gloat and feel better for a moment, as if I honestly knew what the heck I was doing for once

Good for you!

We don't have cable, but do have TV. We get 3 or 4 local stations, but we also have Netflix. We get two movies at a time, always one kid movie and one movie for Mark and me. She's really into the He-Man series right now.

But I'd love to use TV as a reward and not as a usual everyday passtime. Not sure how to do it, though. Nothing holds her attention like TV does (even TV doesn't hold her attention consistently). She doesn't play for an hour on her own. It just doesn't happen.

Good for you guys! I love hearing stories where our parenting plans actually work!

scatterbunny said:

Nothing holds her attention like TV does (even TV doesn't hold her attention consistently). She doesn't play for an hour on her own. It just doesn't happen.

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Oh trust me, the learning to play on her own has been a very long journey for us. Call it a result of Ignoring one's child parenting style Since DH & I are both only children, I knew that life would be pretty hell if dd learned that we are there soley for her entertainment. It's all been baby steps since she was about 7-8 months old teaching her that she needs to make her own fun a lot of times.

No, I didn't abandon her at 8 months, but I did take my daily morning shower while she remained in her crib. First with a 15 minute mobile, then her toys. Once she got older, I'd have her in her playyard in my room next to the bathroom. Around 24 months, I'd gate her in her own room to play safely with her toys while I took care of my morning needs.

She loved listening to her music.... now she listens to different stories read on CD. If dh isn't around, I still gate her in her room during my shower. She even asks for me to do that to keep our dogs clear of her AM snack I'm more relaxed knowing that she's not roaming the house.

She plays on her own for long periods of time in the morning after breakfast, but never has it been in the afternoon. That's been TV time Honestly, I wouldn't even know how to go about teaching her imagination & alone play if I had to do it overnight.

One of her classmates has been in daycare since she was a little baby. Her mom is now permanently at home with her instead. She was commisserating with another mom whose daughter's preschool is out for the summer. We were in a threeway conversation when both were talking about their daughters looking to them to schedule or entertain them now that they're home. Kind of like -- 'well, you wanted us here, now what?' attitude ---- from 4 year olds!!
I didn't let out a peep. What could I say? :shrug-shoulders:

Have you tried read-aloud stories on CD with Haley? If you haven't, your library might have some age appropriate for her. I loved them when I was a kid. She might too

Yay! I bet you're noticing a huge difference in her mood and behavior overall too.

When I was on bedrest with ds, dh took time off work to care for dd and I. He was very overwhelmed by it all, and TV went from being a treat to being a most of the day every day thing. It took us a long time to get back to where we are now of it being a limited thing every day and to not have a tantrum when we say no. Her mood is obviously different on days when she has more TV and on days when she has less...

Anyways, congrats! And enjoy. I love watching my dd play by herself. They have such great imaginations.

Wait...explain this slowly to me.. TV's are actually able to be turned off during the day?














Just kidding of course... ours is background noise and the kids actually voluntarily turn it off now...ignore it when it's on..

That's great that you're seeing the fruits of your labor, though...kids can be so tough to stand up to! Leah's already getting into her independent second year of life, and ooh lah lah, she's a headstrong thing!

joolsplus3 said:

Wait...explain this slowly to me.. TV's are actually able to be turned off during the day?

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:ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO: :ROTFLMAO:

Yeah, the 'off button' is like turn signals on cars -- optional items

joolsplus3 said:

Wait...explain this slowly to me.. TV's are actually able to be turned off during the day?














Just kidding of course... ours is background noise and the kids actually voluntarily turn it off now...ignore it when it's on..

That's great that you're seeing the fruits of your labor, though...kids can be so tough to stand up to! Leah's already getting into her independent second year of life, and ooh lah lah, she's a headstrong thing!

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When do I confess this is us too?

snowbird25ca said:

Yay! I bet you're noticing a huge difference in her mood and behavior overall too.
........................................
Anyways, congrats! And enjoy. I love watching my dd play by herself. They have such great imaginations.

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So far, not so much of an overall mood change, just when she's accepting that TV is off this week.
I do know what you're talking about though. There's been times where she watched too much tv in a single day.
For instance: When we were insulating the attic and she was babysat by it for 5-6 hours , the next day was pure misery because she expected it on that long again. She didn't get it, of course, but it was a whiny battle against addiction. TV was turned off after 45 minutes and she hit the roof. Oh well, I won
One of those guilt parenting moments with the insulation, but DH & I both had to work on that project together. No choice at all since we had no insulation over the garage & only 5 inches throughout the rest of the house. It's helped out our cooling costs/basic comfort so much already and it's not even high summer.

But allowing your child to watch TV for so long is not one of those highlight moments where you feel good about your parenting job. :thumbsdown:


I LOVE hearing her play on her own. I'm such an eavesdropper.

Morganthe said:

Call it a result of Ignoring one's child parenting style

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Hah! I use that style as well... Sometimes mommy just HAS to spend an afternoon with her nose stuck in a book, with only occassional breaks to go "yay, look at what you built with your blocks! Can you do it again?" or "well, how about you play with your trainset now? Wouldn't that be fun? Lets put that here, and this there, and now you can run your train and mommy will watch..."

Morganthe said:

I LOVE hearing her play on her own. I'm such an eavesdropper.

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I like doing that too. Seeing the stuff they come out with, when they think no one is watching.