Vent Young kids/ babies in boosters :(

lovemy2kidstw

New member
So tonight was DD's birthday party & I happened to see a few of her friends getting out of their vehicles. One friend 'H', will be 2 in a few weeks. She was in a backless booster! I had to take a few looks because I was sure I was seeing things!!! Other friend 'A' will be 3 in 3 months & was in a high back booster. I have seen them a few times & the seatbelt was across her properly. I have also seen her asleep & she didn't move out of position. I'm feeling torn.... My crazy car seat side wants to tell them that it's not safe, but my other side doesn't want to make the friends mad. I always post car seat stuff on Facebook hoping that they will seat it. I also have another 'friend' who has a two year old & a 10 month old. Both are FF & have been since about 7 mo old. Why do people not care about car seat safety? When you are pregnant you do everything to keep your baby safe for 9 months & then once they get here that all goes out the window?! Ok rant over
 

lovemy2kidstw

New member
Brigala said:
It's sad, isn't it? :(

Sometimes it's hard for me to keep my mouth shut.
It is!! Even though my kids will go above & beyond the minimums, I would be fine if people around here would just obey the law & requirements for the seat!
 

momtoo3

Well-known member
The 3 yr old I watch is in a nbb with the shoulder belt behind her and the lap belt loose enough she can pull her knees up behind it. It makes me sick. I have mentioned some little things to her parents but they just brush it off. Yesterday she peed in the seat she is in in my van (harnessed) and then I had to run to ds2's school at the other side of our subdivision. I put her in ds2's Vivo for the 3 minute ride (she meets all the requirements) and she fit perfectly. She did move around a little but not much and as soon as I told her to sit right she did. I sent a picture of her properly restrained to her mom but didn't hear back. I asked her if she got it this morning and she said she did. I told her how nice J sat in the highback with the shoulder belt in front of her and she said she noticed and asked J if she wanted one but J said no she likes her pink big girl seat. I am watching for a pink hbb to go on sale or clearance to give to her. There is no chance of them going back to a harness, plus they don't install the harness seat correctly for their 1 yr old (FF) so I think a hbb is a good idea.
I am thinking of starting to booster train this little girl while she is with me :duck: to teach her to sit properly for her parents. We only go on short trips that are less than 10 minutes unless we have to go to the ped for one of my boys. I would put her back in a harness for that trip. She is also about 37 pounds dressed and the seat I have for her (CarGo) only harnesses to 40 pounds. She can use ds2's Vivo since he is at school while I have her and I will figure out what to do by summer. Am I crazy for thinking about booster training a 3 1/2 yr old in this situation?
 

livilou

New member
I'm in the same boat - a friend of mine (well, not sure you can really call her that anymore, but anywho) has her ten month old son forward facing and he has been forward facing since he was seven months - in his infant car seat.

I actually posted about it on here as I really, really wanted to say something about it but I quickly realized that unfortunately I can't make people care. Like you, I post things on Facebook hoping that they will see but as I've noticed even if they do see, they're unlikely to care. :(
 

babyherder

New member
Am I crazy for thinking about booster training a 3 1/2 yr old in this situation?
It depends. Are you willing for this child to be less safe while in your direct care so that she will hopefully be more safe in the long run? Can you deal with what happens if you get into an accident with her in a booster, knowing that she should have been harnessed? For me, the answer is no. I could never live with that kind of guilt. But if that's a risk you're willing to take its up to you. And I don't think there's anything wrong with it.
 

momtoo3

Well-known member
It depends. Are you willing for this child to be less safe while in your direct care so that she will hopefully be more safe in the long run? Can you deal with what happens if you get into an accident with her in a booster, knowing that she should have been harnessed? For me, the answer is no. I could never live with that kind of guilt. But if that's a risk you're willing to take its up to you. And I don't think there's anything wrong with it.
These are all questions I have been asking myself. I most definitely want her as safe as possible all the time. Obviously won't happen with her parents not caring. I don't think I could live with myself if something happened while I have her but I would feel almost as badly if I watched her pull out of my driveway and get into an accident on the way home with the basically no restraint. I want to think that by training her she would learn to sit properly in her parents cars and be safer the majority of the time she is in a vehicle. They travel alot and have sent me pics of her laying down on her side with the lapbelt just over her legs saying how cute she is. I said something once about how it didn't look comfy but knew it was pointless to persue. J loves to open gifts so I think a pretty hbb all wrapped up would make her want to use it. She would be safer in a hbb in their cars than a harnessed seat. I just want her to be safe. I do not want that to be at the expense of being safer in my van though. I am still thinking about what I will do.
 

livilou

New member
These are all questions I have been asking myself. I most definitely want her as safe as possible all the time. Obviously won't happen with her parents not caring. I don't think I could live with myself if something happened while I have her but I would feel almost as badly if I watched her pull out of my driveway and get into an accident on the way home with the basically no restraint. I want to think that by training her she would learn to sit properly in her parents cars and be safer the majority of the time she is in a vehicle. They travel alot and have sent me pics of her laying down on her side with the lapbelt just over her legs saying how cute she is. I said something once about how it didn't look comfy but knew it was pointless to persue. J loves to open gifts so I think a pretty hbb all wrapped up would make her want to use it. She would be safer in a hbb in their cars than a harnessed seat. I just want her to be safe. I do not want that to be at the expense of being safer in my van though. I am still thinking about what I will do.
It's a tough choice you have to make for sure! I really have no idea what I'd do if I had to make that decision.
 

Dmcj13

New member
These are all questions I have been asking myself. I most definitely want her as safe as possible all the time. Obviously won't happen with her parents not caring. I don't think I could live with myself if something happened while I have her but I would feel almost as badly if I watched her pull out of my driveway and get into an accident on the way home with the basically no restraint. I want to think that by training her she would learn to sit properly in her parents cars and be safer the majority of the time she is in a vehicle. They travel alot and have sent me pics of her laying down on her side with the lapbelt just over her legs saying how cute she is. I said something once about how it didn't look comfy but knew it was pointless to persue. J loves to open gifts so I think a pretty hbb all wrapped up would make her want to use it. She would be safer in a hbb in their cars than a harnessed seat. I just want her to be safe. I do not want that to be at the expense of being safer in my van though. I am still thinking about what I will do.
Could you try "stationary" booster training? work on her in the booster while sitting in the driveway, remind her how to sit, and maybe reward her for doing well. Don't do more than a little at a time though, or she would probably get bored and upset since the car is not moving. I don't know if that would work or not, but I just could not move my vehicle with a three your old in a booster. I am hardly even comfortable with my 3 yo forward facing. :(
 

momtoo3

Well-known member
I am hardly even comfortable with my 3 yo forward facing. :(
This is me. Ds3 turned FF because he was having horrible leg pains and we tried everything else. The pain did not go away and after a month and a half, I went to turn him back and he was right at the 1 inch mark so he stayed FF.
After losing sleep thinking over booster training I have decided to train her only while going places within our subdivision. We frequently go to open gym at the park district gymnastic center at the other end of our subdivision, to ds2's school occasionally and the 7 different parks when it is nice. All of the streets have a speed limit of 25-30 mph and are well policed so most people don't speed. She will be harnessed when we leave the subdivision and when the weather is bad. I know most accidents happen close to home but I have only seen 1 in 8 years in our subdivision. This way I feel like I am keeping her pretty safe and helping her learn to be safe with her parents.
 

hedgefun

New member
These are all questions I have been asking myself. I most definitely want her as safe as possible all the time. Obviously won't happen with her parents not caring. I don't think I could live with myself if something happened while I have her but I would feel almost as badly if I watched her pull out of my driveway and get into an accident on the way home with the basically no restraint. I want to think that by training her she would learn to sit properly in her parents cars and be safer the majority of the time she is in a vehicle. They travel alot and have sent me pics of her laying down on her side with the lapbelt just over her legs saying how cute she is. I said something once about how it didn't look comfy but knew it was pointless to persue. J loves to open gifts so I think a pretty hbb all wrapped up would make her want to use it. She would be safer in a hbb in their cars than a harnessed seat. I just want her to be safe. I do not want that to be at the expense of being safer in my van though. I am still thinking about what I will do.
Do you think that if you bought her a HBB ad a gift that they would even use it on a regular basis?

Also, if you're not comfortable going on a short ride with her in the booster, how about a mall parking lot early in the morning? I know that accidents can happen anywhere and parking lots are a common place for accidents, but in theory you could find a nice empty spot early in the morning to ride around slowly.
 

momtoo3

Well-known member
Do you think that if you bought her a HBB ad a gift that they would even use it on a regular basis?

Also, if you're not comfortable going on a short ride with her in the booster, how about a mall parking lot early in the morning? I know that accidents can happen anywhere and parking lots are a common place for accidents, but in theory you could find a nice empty spot early in the morning to ride around slowly.
I do think they would use it if I bought it. I help them get the kids in and out of the car each day and I know they would feel guilty if I didn't see it in one of their vehicles.

As for a mall parking lot or any empty lot, by the time I get ds2 on the bus (8:20ish) and the kids packed up, everything close to us is usually busy and I have to be home again by 10:30 to feed ds3 and get him on the bus by 11 for preschool. Then it is nap time. It is a great idea though!
I only take the kids out 1-2 times a week. 1 day to the bank where she will be harnessed and another to open gym. When it gets a bit warmer we will go to the parks again in our subdivision. I think booster training her for the quick trips to the park or open gym, all are within a mile or so of our house and take less than 5 minutes, is the best solution.
 

Traquy

New member
I am still thinking about what I will do.
FWIW the little girl you are talking about is the same age/weight that my DD was when I started to booster train her. I had my reasons, and although she is in a Frontier still harnessed in my car I feel MUCH better knowing that if she rides with a friend and they only use a booster she will know how to act and how to ride safely in it. With the majority of her friends in 2nd year preschool now using high back boosters, and the "extra" seats they keep at the school (they do have a rule no child leaves without a booster) being HBB I want her to be safe in them.

So, I will go against the grain here and say if I were in your position I would use a HBB in my car to help her learn so she can be safe as often as possible. Safe in my car 10 minutes, unsafe with her parents all.the.time vs. still pretty safe in my car and much safer with parents all.the.time...I know what I'd choose, but that's just me.
 

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