Letting a child go FF when they still fit RF

[momtotwogirls]

I would try and see if she would be ok if you told her on your birthday you can. I let Addy forward face on long trips because we get a small car for trips and with such an upright install and her long legs it hurts her bum and back. I dont let her full time and probably wont until she is 4. At 4 I let Emma decide what seat to ride in and she chose the FN85. She did ask to rf right after our accident last week so I may see if she fits into Addy's new seat and let her rf but 4 is my general rule for deciding.

 

[penguingrooves]

What age will you let your child have a say in turning FF if they still fit RF?

simply answering your question about what *I* would do, my kid is a year older but not much bigger than yours and still RFing. i'm personally not comfortable with turning my kid FF yet, but i won't judge anyone for turning their kids FF at age 3 despite others judging me for continuing to RF. but do FF only when YOU are comfortable with the decision. i hope your daughter's back pain is gone for good.

 

[rachelandtyke]

Ah, that's exactly the reason I didn't turn DS ffing to drive the holiday lights at the park any of the times we went. He doesnt' know it is an option for him to ride any other way than rfing, and I think if he knew, he'd start asking for it! DD is enough older than him that he doesn't assume that he should ride the same as she does anyway. I don't know what I would do if one of my kdis was asking to be ffing when they were rfing. Thankfully, DD never asked (actually cried when I turned her at 4y4m because she outgrew rfing by weight) and while DS has asked to sit in DD's seat, he accepts that it is her seat and not his and climbs into his own. So different when they know there is another way!

The back pain is definitely a reason to consider turning your dd, though. She's old enough and big enough that is certainly a reasonable decision to turn her ffing.

 

[Carrie_R]

I have to say, I really struggle with this. It's not a decision I've had to make, really - the only fit-throwers I've had were both under 3, which imo is non-negotiable territory. The youngest I've permanantly turned a child is 3y11m, when he outgrew the Radian by weight, and that was after daily weighings for months (which I don't regret, as it got him to almost 4 instead of 3.5... and honestly wasn't that big of a hassle.) I wasn't going to import for a kid not my own.

I've had two that have eeerf'd (defining that as past 4.) One rode mostly rf, occasionally ff, until just before she turned 5. (At that point she was 34lbs and still fit in a MR by height.) That's when I turned J's seat, and I decided that I needed to get over myself so I turned her. Picked her up from preschool and got a lecture all the way home - "Why my seat like this? I want to sit the other way! You put it in the wrong way!" I turned it right back around, lol.

The other is my current charge, M. She's 4.5 and again, I decided I needed to get over it and put in the seat ff when I started watching her. The subject of "sitting backwards" came up and she thought it sounded awesome. So rf she's been. Like you, I turned her ff for a drive-thru light display, and after that she asked to go ff, but I reminded her that the forward seat wouldn't have her pretty pink cover and she chose rf. At her age, I would have turned her if it's really what she wanted... But since she easily still fits rf, it's not without misgivings. (I also wonder about her bone development, she's got some malabsorbtion of nutrients issues.) I would be lying if I didn't say I breathed a sigh of relief when both girls chose rf.

With your dd, it's all well and good for us on here to say turn her - but I know for me, my "mommy gut" would set off alarm bells and I just couldn't do it. For leg/back pain, maybe, but I really think for me, I just couldn't. If your mommy gut lets you, then I sure don't think it's irresponsible to consider her wishes. Imo, there's a big difference in responding to an angry screaming fit and a genuinely sad kid. Not everyone will agree with that, though.

In either event, at the end of the day, you've done awesome keeping her rf as long as you have!

 

[aetj115]

My current youngest will be 4 in Feb. He still fits very nicely RF in his MR. I just posted I put him FF today. He asked to go back RF. Personally, it is ROUGH on me and my big ol' belly lugging him in and out of it that way. A part of me wants him FF, but I am with you and feel SOOOO guilty doing it when he still fits. They just seem so tiny to me yet. (and to think, DD was boostered at this age :thumbsdown: ). I would give it a few more tries and see what she does, if not you've done a great job this far and she will be properly restrained FF so she will still be safe

 

[SignCuer]

My van rule is at least 4 and reached the height/weight limit. Mostly because my van is a 1996 which I'm more stricter and I know it's safer. I like that rule... since I haven't had a kid yet who hasn't become an exception to that rule... maybe I will someday!

So far... none of my older kids who rides RFing complains... they actually prefer this way so I'm fine. The only grief I got was my current 4 yr old charge and it only lasted like 10 minutes ... he really enjoys riding "backwards"

So personally...

If they still fit RFing, keep them RFing... for me God forbid if anything happens.

However, you're the parent and if you feel comfortable FFing then so be it. A properly seat used is the best.

 

[Anne]

Thankfully, she seems to have accepted rf for now and has stopped asking to turn ff. I know her, and I know she has not forgotten. We'll see how long this lasts before she brings it up again. I'd like to make it through winter, at least. But if it comes down to battling her every car ride or her in pain rf, I think I'm comfortable enough with her ff. It's not what I'd prefer and I don't *like* it. But I think I can accept it. Let's just hope she's given up for a long while and it won't be much of an issue.

 

[msg221]

Nour and Zain finally rode FF in my vehicle for the first time a few weeks ago even though I do have seats that they still fit in RF. They never complained about going from FF in their parents vehicle (at around age 2-2.5) to RF in mine. I got that super deal on the FR85 from Wayfair, so I went ahead and put it in for Zain. He LOVES it. As he was getting into my car for what would have been his second ride in it, he said very excitedly "Ooo! New seat AGAIN!" I told him it was here to stay, so no worries about it going away! I did finally install the Diono RN RXT today now that I have my angle adjuster, so I swapped out the TFP for it. I'm leaving it in there for now so when I am up to it, I can try the TB and the Maestro to see if those will work in a 3 across.

Anyway, if she doesn't ask again about going FF, that will be great if you can get a little more time, but if she does and you do turn her, you still did great. I know how you feel, but I finally was feeling fine about turning them. And it came in handy today when I went shopping and was able to fit large items behind the driver and passenger seats!

 

[java]

3 is my minimum for ffing. DD is half way there (almost 19mths old) and she is really small at 18lbs and 29 inches tall. She still fits in the snugride 22! I am getting a radian soon, so if she continues to grow at her rate, she will seriously fit rfing until she is 6+ I would guess. But I can't see actually keeing her rfing until then unless she wants to. She will turn in the truck at 3 probably (unless she still fits with tons of room and the issue never comes up) but will rf in the car with the radian until after 3....I have no idea how far past 3 though.

In your case, I would be fine ffing her. Well, I don't know if I would turn my dd RIGHT now if I was in your shoes simply because we have had a harsh winter so far with lots of snow and ice and accidents. So I would make her wait until spring. But you may not have the same situation.

 

[jewlsvern]

I was in the same place last year. My DD is close to the same stats as your DD only a year older (5 in March). She started begging to FF. I tried to push her off but she brought it up all the time. I finally gave in a turned her FFing a few weeks before her birthday.

She stills fits RFing and I turn her on long distance trips. She also will occasionally sit in her brothers seat which is RFing when she feels like watching out the back.

If I left her RFing until she no longer fit she would probably be 7 still RFing. I hated turning her but it wasn't worth the complaints. She is so much happier and I feel past the age where it is crucial to RF.

 

[thepeach80]

We let Ilana go ffing 2 mos before she turned 4 b/c she hated rfing. The boys never cared much but she hated it and really wanted to ff so I let her. She wouldn't have outgrown it till at least 4.5yo. I've been thinking about letting Olivia stay ffing so she can go in the back. I think of all the kids, AJ would not fight w/ her the most which would make trips much happier.