Vent Irritated with my cousin and her car seat usage


New member
So, I gave my cousin a Radian XT to use with her now 2.5 year old average sized little girl. She literally left it behind her mom's car a few weeks ago and her mom ran it over. I was literally very angry that they RAN a carseat over. To make matters worse I had an Evenflo Tribute I had given her a year ago and she said she didn't like the cover and just gave it away... I also sold her a Boulevard for $50 when her little girl was 6 months and she said she didn't have money for a convertible and she gave that her to mom and her mom completely trashed the seat.

She then places the little girl in a backless booster and tells me it's just temporary until payday and they can get another seat. (I was not going to lend her one of mine if she's that inconsiderate with the seats I have given her.) I looked on facebook this morning and she has a picture of her 2.5 year old in her sedan sitting with just a seat belt on... The infant's seat is completely crooked and the handle is up. They are traveling to VA beach today. :( I'm scared and sad for these little girls.

It just makes me sad that I have shared all the info with her regarding ERF, EH, and keeping your children safe in the car. Not to mention I have shared the stories of my sister's car accident and how car seats have saved my niece from serious injuries.

Vent over. :(:(


New member
I would be livid they wrecked my Radian.

It's frustrating when people you love and care about don't care about carseats and car safety. But you can't make them. You did what you could - informed them. Now you have to step back. They're the parents. You COULD call 911 when you know they're on their way somewhere. Especially with a 2 year old in a seat belt. It might help in some small way.

Rule #1 - Don't lend out your car seats to people. You can only give them away.:) That way it doesn't hurt as much when they wreck them.


New member
I second the "I would be livid" motion and also would call the police when she's on the road. Maybe a hefty ticket will open her eyes.


New member
I'm so sorry. It's very hard when people put their kids in harm's way. I've had to keep biting my own tongue. One of my best friends had her year-old son in a FF seat (this was before I even knew anything about ERF) when I was visiting, and I noted that the seat was sliding side to side freely. Not just a couple of inches, but like a bead on a necklace. Partly it was that they had it on a leather seat, on a 'protective' mat, but mainly they just hadn't tightened it down hardly at all. I told them how it was supposed to be installed, and was going to tighten it for them, but her husband stopped me - "It's better to have some 'give' in case of an accident!" o_O I even sent them links about proper usage after I got back, but my friend just laughed it off and said he was fine.

And I can't convince my own brother to do ERF with my 2yo niece (even before she turned two, and she's a teeny thing) - he read the Freakonomics thing and I can't change his mind for anything. I'm just glad that she is in the middle position and that she's harnessed in a Britax.

So hang in there mama - you did your best to inform them (and even give them amazing car seats!!), and can only hope they don't get into any accidents from here on out.
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You did a heck of a lot more than many people out there would have, so you should be proud of what you did. If, God forbid, anything does happen you know you did what you could have, and more. You've gone above the call of duty and anyone would be flustered to see it all disregarded :(

I think you did a wonderful job and helped as much as you could. It's in the mommies hands now :(

Kayden - 2.5 RF BLVD 65 & RF Truefit Layla- 6 FF BLVD 65 CS & HBTB


New member
Holy god I know how you feel. I go through this ALL. THE. TIME. with my cousins, and my aunt and uncle just don't give a flying flip. I bought them a Maestro and Nautilus (which they do use for the 4 y/o) and a HB TB (only sometimes use for the 6 y/o), but they hardly ever lock the belt on the 4 y/o's seat and think lap belts are perfectly safe. I'M SO FRUSTRATED!!! I was down there a week ago and since they were coming up here to visit, I put the 2 harnessed seats in the 2 middle lap belt positions to force the other kids to use shoulder belts. Nope... 6 y/o tells me my aunt took out 1 of them and put the other back outboard (and I quote, "because there's a reason I put it there" (i.e. for her own laziness)), and of course the middle 2 kids (11 and 13) rode in the lap-only positions so they could lie down.
I told the oldest (18) that I was just done. Just. Freaking. Done. She said at least they ride safely in her car... which they do... but still. WHY DOESN'T THEIR MOTHER CARE?!?


New member
I hear ya, I can't believe what I see family members doing sometimes. My BIL put his daughter forward facing at five months because she had outgrown her infant seat. We bought them a Complete Air because they told us they liked our's and because we had been told they couldn't afford a new seat (which I've had issues with because both him and his girlfriend smoke a pack a day and they pay $100 a month for cable not to mention how much they eat out but whatever). They took that seat and exchanged it for a Scenera and got the difference put on a gift card which got spent on a Blu-Ray player. :( it makes me sad cause I also know they've got an older car without locking seat belts and no locking clip and no top tether or anything not to mention the tiny baby that should be rear facing.


New member
Wow!:eek: Yeah I think I would be beyond livid if someone ran over my Radian, espically since those seats aren't exactly the chespest on the market. :(

As far as car safety you did your part, you have informed them what the correct way and safe way is for those children to travel. We actually not too long ago had a little mis-commuication and our Radian XTSL was not installed correctly into a rental vehicle. My husband thought it was and put my DS who is 5 in it (5pt harness). I guess they went around one of those ramps onto a freeway (or the turnpike) and she was turned sideways strapped tight into the Radian saying "daddy help, please!"... Apparently a cop had seen this happened and pulled him over. It would have been a $150 fine had our child not been restrained correctly. Instead he just made my husband install the car seat correctly....

SO SORRY that you have tried to do the right thing for people that you love and care for, but yet they don't seem to give a hoot! Maybe they need some kind of wake up call?


New member
Maybe I'm really stingy but I'd send a bill for the radian to her, she may have no respect for proper car seat usage but she should respect your belongings and pay you for the damages


New member
totally ot first - I LIVE IN VA BEACH!

second, I would have stopped giving her seats after what she did with that first one.

You can't help everyone. It's just so sad.


New member
She would never pay me. :( She borrowed money from my dad for "medical bills" over 2 years ago and has never made an attempt to pay him. I feel bad for her girls and thats why I try and help out but DH and I are definitely not in a place where we can have belongings of over $100+ to just be destroyed...

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