grandparents vs carseat, it never ends

[fastdogs]

I haven't had a run in with my dad in a while over the car seat, so I guess it was due. I got a new FPSVD for them since Andy had outgrown his touriva. I showed him how easy it was to install in their pickup, and he left it in there for a while.
This past weekend he must have decided that Andy needed to go in a ride in the tracker with the top down, so he put it in there. The tracker has those kind of seatbelts that don't lock except in an accident, so would have needed the locking clip, if he knew what that was. He doesn't, so...
He removed the top tether, and used it to somehow tie the carseat down on the right side, maybe to the seat leg or something. He took a lightweight cargo strap and tethered the top of the carseat to a loop in the back, I think it's a cargo hook. He said he had it tied down good, and was pretty proud of it.
I found the locking clip and was able to get it on the seatbelt (I've never used one before) so that the seat was secured with the seatbelt, but I wasn't able to figure out how to undo what he'd done to the cargo strap tether and the strap he'd tied it down with on the side. He had stormed away by that time, it was really hot and if I had had a pair of scissors or a knife I would have just cut it loose. He spent who knows how much time tying it down improperly instead of reading the instructions and installing it properly. I am disgusted.
vickie

 

[VLsMom]

lol - when I read this the first time, I thought you meant he installed the car seat in a TRACTOR...not a Geo Tracker. I was so confused until I read it again.

Grandparents will never get it. My MIL even can stand all the "5-point" seats ... they're annoying to her.

 

[Victorious4]

It's so hard -- they try ... but carseats weren't typical in their day

This is when I urge my local families to just bring the grandparents in to me for a seatcheck + education: that way the emotional family baggage doesn't get so much in the way & I can fully answer more questions (one of my tips for grandparents is to simply not move the carseat once it's installed & simply not put kiddo into any vehicle without a carseat, to have the other adult watch kiddo)

 

[VLsMom]

thats a good idea

 

[kiramay]

I thought you said tractor too! lol

I guess I'm lucky. My mom had us in harnesses when most people put their kids on pillows. So when I talk about this seat and that, she's totally with me. And my ILs are "to each her own" and humor me. Now my BIL.... he gets annoyed with I tell him he needs to tighten my neice's harness and raise the chest clip.

 

[Patriot201]

Grandparents will never get it.

I guess I am very lucky. My parents are awesome with carseat safety. They totally buy into ERF, EH, top-tethering, installing tightly, etc. They bought a Britax Boulevard for my mom's car and have it installed, RF and tethered, TIGHTLY and APPROPRIATELY in my mom's car. They also fully understand why I am a nut, though they do tease me that I need "a new hobby!"

 

[Shaunam]

Oh thank goodness DS's grandparents aren't like that! I think I would have a fit. :thumbsdown: My mom and MIL don't have the first clue how to install a seat properly, but they do know how to buckle him properly and they know to let me know if they have to take the seat out for anything so I can put the seat back in right. I always check it anyways when I put him in one of their cars, not that I don't trust them, but, well, you just never know.

They are really thankful for the advances in car seats since we were kids.

 

[VLsMom]

I guess I am very lucky. My parents are awesome with carseat safety. They totally buy into ERF, EH, top-tethering, installing tightly, etc. They bought a Britax Boulevard for my mom's car and have it installed, RF and tethered, TIGHTLY and APPROPRIATELY in my mom's car. They also fully understand why I am a nut, though they do tease me that I need "a new hobby!"

Thats great!!

 

[becca011906]

My grandparents are GREAT with knowing how to buckle the kids and have managed to get the LATCHed seat out of their van on their own but dont' care at all to know how to install them, they let me hadle that then show them the right way to buckle the kids, and they are good to go. these are MY grandparents so they are in their 70's and only take the kids 1 at a time usally for b-days out to pick out a toy and for lunch/dinner.

NOW my parents/inlaws on the other hand dont' seem to get it... drives me nuts to the point that they don't usally take them unless absolute need be!!! LOL

 

[elle7715]

Sounds like something my ILs would do. Which is exactly why they will never, ever be responsible for moving or putting my daughter into a car seat. My mom is clueless but knows she is, and would never try to install a car seat on her own. I think I prefer that.

 

[jdchic3]

I think I'm really blessed! My dad sort of just laughs at me, probably thinks I'm a little paranoid, but he still goes with what I say and always buckles in DD properly. He usually still has me check though. My Mom totally buys it all too and always wants the safest thing fir the kids. I think my MIL would probably think I'm a little crazy, but she's pretty gullible so would be easy to convince it's safer. Don't know about my SIL, she's a little hard-headed. She's the one who bought the DC in Odyssey because she thought it looked really cool. At least she got a safe seat out of the deal. I think she may have learned a little too because she bought the Shannon BV, then again she might have also only gotten that because it's pretty! Anyway, the point was my parents, who I see all the time, are GREAT!

 

[dd9736]

my mom couldn't figure out how to work the handle on DS' first infant seat, she was babysitting, so I'm a little scared about whether she'd gotten the seat in her car right after that, we had the base in the truck with us. Though she does understand the importance of the carseat, I'm not sure she understands how to install it. I'll always install the carseat for my mom and inlaws, but my dad, is amazing, and I'm just going to make sure the instruction manual is there incase he has a problem (when he needs to take DS) I've seen a few of his installs though and they're rock solid, better than mine at times.

 

[kctwinmommy]

That sounds like what my FIL would do. Thankfully, my parents will do whatever I ask them to. They've never had to install a seat though, I just make sure it's all installed for them. The few times they've taken our kids places without us, they usually have our car instead (like vacations). But the IL's... whole other story there. They've only watched them for any extended time a couple of times, so that's the good thing. But again, we leave our car with them and they still don't take them anywhere cuz they don't want to know how to use them. Which is fine, at least they don't want to take them places then.

 

[kangato2roos]

I am incredibly lucky in that my parents are nothing like this. My mother had me teach her how to install each and every seat we own, even though she only ever uses the Scenera. She had me show her and then watch her install and uninstall until we were sure she had it. She's on board with erf, eh, and proper booster use. But then, she put my sister and I in carseats when we were little, even though everybody around her called her crazy and overprotective. Way to go, Mom! :thumbsup:

My in-laws, on the other hand, sound very similar to your parents. When my dd was 4 and my ds was born, my mil kept dd while I was in the hospital. She brought her to pick us up and had the infant carseat (borrowed for that one trip because my car had flooded during the hurricane) installed wrong. Dh fixed it. I get in the car and find out she not only hadn't put dd's carseat in the car, she wasn't even making her buckle a seatbelt at all! She drove my 4 year old dd around for 3 days with no carseat, no booster, and not even a seatbelt. I was LIVID. We had given her dd's carseat. Dh had installed it for her. She purposely took it OUT of the car and didn't use it because she though dd was too big for a baby seat. She encouraged my sil to turn her first dd ff at 10 months. She encouraged her to turn her twins at about the same age. Now dn is in a backless booster at age almost 3 (will be 3 in September) and the 2 year old twins are in ff harnessed seats, probably not for much longer though. They don't listen to me about safety at all. After all, they didn't use carseats or seat belts when dh and his sister and brother were little and they all survived, so why should the grandchildren use them? :hitselfonhead:

My kids don't ride in cars with them anymore. Ever.

 

[singingpond]

My dad joked that DD (4 m.o.) looked like an astronaut getting strapped in for launch when I was buckling her in for the trip home after a recent visit with my parents. However, the joke was well meant (and accurate, LOL). My mom worried a bit that the straps looked too tight on the baby, but that's more from lack of information than from wrong-headed conviction that it should be done differently. My parents haven't had occasion to transport the kids, but I'm sure they would take the whole carseat thing seriously, and follow instructions. They do recognize the carseats available today as a real safety improvement over what they had available (basically nothing) when their own children were small.

My husband's parents live locally, and actually spend more time with our kids. They have occasionally transported our oldest son (just turned 6 y.o.) in an Evenflo booster they bought for their vehicle. They don't know much about carseats in general (they purchased that booster initially for a visiting 3 y.o. great-grandchild, even though I had advised that the child would be safer in a harnessed seat at that age), but will generally go along with what we say. They have asked a few times whether our 2 1/2 y.o. could ride in the booster in their car; they accept it when we say 'no', but don't seem to really 'get it'. Recently they were kind enough to babysit our sons while DH and I went to a doctor's appointment, and they asked about taking the kids somewhere in the car, just as we were about to go out the door. I said that I didn't have time to install the 2 1/2 y.o.'s carseat in their vehicle at that point, since it might take me 10 or 15 minutes to do a good job -- this seemed to surprise them, but they didn't complain or argue about it.

All in all, I guess we're fairly lucky in the grandparents' willingness to accept our position on carseats, even if they don't quite share it.

Katrin

 

[VLsMom]

I am incredibly lucky in that my parents are nothing like this. My mother had me teach her how to install each and every seat we own, even though she only ever uses the Scenera. She had me show her and then watch her install and uninstall until we were sure she had it. She's on board with erf, eh, and proper booster use. But then, she put my sister and I in carseats when we were little, even though everybody around her called her crazy and overprotective. Way to go, Mom!

Wow!

 

[vatechgrad]

My family thinks I'm a little over the top crazy with the carseat thing. However, they know how serious I am and they will lose unsupervised time with him if they violate my rules. I install the seat for them or we trade cars. They know how to buckle him and he's 4 now so he tells people if they aren't doing it right

I don't have inlaws as I'm a single mom so I don't have to deal with that part.

janet

 

[daizy]

My parents aren't great, they will follow my rules, but turn my 2 year old FF is they have to install the carseat. (in their car you have to CLIMB in the carseat to get it tight, leather seats) so it is a little understandable...I don't love it, but they keep them in a carseat. Inlaws complain when I have them RF in MY car but it isn't too big of a deal either way. my mom was a little lax about driving down her dirt road with DD not in a carseat, but I just asked her not to do it again and she stopped.

 

[Jordynsmama]

Yeah mt mom is very safety conscious....sometimes she thinks I am a freak(like with this forum) but she just jokingly makes fun of me but totally gets it and knows the importance, just not the obsession. My grandma also knows my freakishness and she is actually not able to drive, but her bf does....but I do my best to get around them driving with her. He is just too old(80) and he drives too fast and ugh... it just isnt worth it to me. So they just walk when they go anywhere!