Splash
New member
Sitting on my back porch are four children, only one of which is mine.
Our friend Lori called earlier asking if we would watch the kids because her husband is drunk and attacking her and hopefully will be arrested if someone finds him. He's on probation for assault, among other things. He did some damage to her vehicle and tried to take the kids, when her oldest piped up that she was coming here (great). Lori HAD to go to school, if she misses another day, she's done. I'm SO supportive of her going back to school AND working two full time jobs while raising three kids with an abusive alcoholic husband who she won't/can't leave. I don't want her to get kicked out, so we told her to bring the kids here. When I told her that, I thought he was on his way to jail. Turns out he made off before the cops could get him, so he's blowing in the wind. He's drunk out of his mind, on a bicycle, about five miles from here (at last sighting). I don't know if he'll remember how to get here or not, but I'm hoping not.
SO Lori went to school and took her test and left early and is on her way to the family counseling center who will at least get her some free therapy. She didn't file a police report because she didn't have time. If he doesn't get arrested (which he will, if someone can find him, because drinking is a violation of his probation), she can't go home to night. But she sure as hell can't stay here. Her kids are good kids (5 and 3 year old girls, 2 year old boy), but I don't have room or patience for three additional children and their mother to be here. Plus, I can't put *my* family at risk having them here if he is on a bender and determined to find them and be an ass.
She brought me no clothes, no diapers, no car seats (ha! I have those!), and I need to feed these children. Her girls are fine, her son is driving me nuts and covered in snot. I can handle blood and feces and vomit but I just can NOT do snot. Especially when it's not my kid's snot. Which is why I always taught children old enough to wipe their own noses.
Charlie's scared of them, he's already injured with a 5+ inch cut up his back and a giant bruise surrounding it where the 2 year old tackled him and he fell on a board on the unfinished porch that is perfectly safe for Charlie alone but not Charlie being tackled by a kid twice his size. I am scared to feed them, because I know it will be a giant mess. Tuesday is kids eat free night (oh so tempting) at a lot of places around here, which eliminates me cleaning up the mess, but involves four tired and hungry children, three of which have had a day from hell, in a restaurant.
Plus, do I stay here or leave? I don't want him showing up here, but he might. I don't want to NOT be here when he gets here, and he might have a key. I don't *think* so, but Lori has a key and I suppose it's always possible he might have made a copy at some point. And while I want to be here to call the cops and prevent him from destroying my house, I also DON'T want to be here with four small children when the father of three of them is making a scene and too drunk to spell his own name.
I made Lori write a letter stating that she left the kids in my care, just in case he does show up moderately sober and demands to get the kids back. I mean, he's on a bicycle, so he can't really take them anywhere... but a cop could still tell me I have to let them go with him. He took her cell phone so there is no way to get hold of her if we need her. Thankfully she's getting counseling, good god she needs it. I hope they help her there. And I hope he's arrested so she can go home. But she doesn't want him arrested because she's in "abused wife" mode that he can't control his actions and that it'll be fine once he's sober and that he really loves them and AH!!!!! Why do women DO this? He attacked her in a bank parking lot and threatened her, how can she NOT see that he needs to be locked up? He's a drunk, he needs to dry up and get away from them. I mean, she sat there and told me that she doesn't feel safe going home or taking the kids to day care tomorrow, because she's afraid he'll hurt them, but then she won't press charges? What the hell?
What do I do? Kick her and three small children out? Tell her that it's her issue and not to bring us into it? Keep the kids but make her leave? What???
Our friend Lori called earlier asking if we would watch the kids because her husband is drunk and attacking her and hopefully will be arrested if someone finds him. He's on probation for assault, among other things. He did some damage to her vehicle and tried to take the kids, when her oldest piped up that she was coming here (great). Lori HAD to go to school, if she misses another day, she's done. I'm SO supportive of her going back to school AND working two full time jobs while raising three kids with an abusive alcoholic husband who she won't/can't leave. I don't want her to get kicked out, so we told her to bring the kids here. When I told her that, I thought he was on his way to jail. Turns out he made off before the cops could get him, so he's blowing in the wind. He's drunk out of his mind, on a bicycle, about five miles from here (at last sighting). I don't know if he'll remember how to get here or not, but I'm hoping not.
SO Lori went to school and took her test and left early and is on her way to the family counseling center who will at least get her some free therapy. She didn't file a police report because she didn't have time. If he doesn't get arrested (which he will, if someone can find him, because drinking is a violation of his probation), she can't go home to night. But she sure as hell can't stay here. Her kids are good kids (5 and 3 year old girls, 2 year old boy), but I don't have room or patience for three additional children and their mother to be here. Plus, I can't put *my* family at risk having them here if he is on a bender and determined to find them and be an ass.
She brought me no clothes, no diapers, no car seats (ha! I have those!), and I need to feed these children. Her girls are fine, her son is driving me nuts and covered in snot. I can handle blood and feces and vomit but I just can NOT do snot. Especially when it's not my kid's snot. Which is why I always taught children old enough to wipe their own noses.
Charlie's scared of them, he's already injured with a 5+ inch cut up his back and a giant bruise surrounding it where the 2 year old tackled him and he fell on a board on the unfinished porch that is perfectly safe for Charlie alone but not Charlie being tackled by a kid twice his size. I am scared to feed them, because I know it will be a giant mess. Tuesday is kids eat free night (oh so tempting) at a lot of places around here, which eliminates me cleaning up the mess, but involves four tired and hungry children, three of which have had a day from hell, in a restaurant.
Plus, do I stay here or leave? I don't want him showing up here, but he might. I don't want to NOT be here when he gets here, and he might have a key. I don't *think* so, but Lori has a key and I suppose it's always possible he might have made a copy at some point. And while I want to be here to call the cops and prevent him from destroying my house, I also DON'T want to be here with four small children when the father of three of them is making a scene and too drunk to spell his own name.
I made Lori write a letter stating that she left the kids in my care, just in case he does show up moderately sober and demands to get the kids back. I mean, he's on a bicycle, so he can't really take them anywhere... but a cop could still tell me I have to let them go with him. He took her cell phone so there is no way to get hold of her if we need her. Thankfully she's getting counseling, good god she needs it. I hope they help her there. And I hope he's arrested so she can go home. But she doesn't want him arrested because she's in "abused wife" mode that he can't control his actions and that it'll be fine once he's sober and that he really loves them and AH!!!!! Why do women DO this? He attacked her in a bank parking lot and threatened her, how can she NOT see that he needs to be locked up? He's a drunk, he needs to dry up and get away from them. I mean, she sat there and told me that she doesn't feel safe going home or taking the kids to day care tomorrow, because she's afraid he'll hurt them, but then she won't press charges? What the hell?
What do I do? Kick her and three small children out? Tell her that it's her issue and not to bring us into it? Keep the kids but make her leave? What???