I totally agree that it's more a matter of simply being confined in any way whatsoever at that age when little ones are more or less "programmed" to be exploring exploring exploring -- having someone else in the back is just like the best thing to explore & occupy kiddo's attention such that being constrained isn't as noticeable to him.... So, when there are 2 adults in the car, have someone sit in the back with him even if it means installing the carseat next to the door instead of in the middle (so long as the seat base doesn't move more than 1" it is still very safe: RF 5-point carseat is actually safer next to the door than an adult is using a 3-point lap/shoulder belt).
The No Cry Sleep Solution (for
infants & for
toddlers/preschoolers) is great in general, & I've also found that just playing kiddo's favorite music everytime he's in the car helps, as does providing a carseat mirror & other toys in a sort of random rotation so kiddo doesn't get bored with them (safe toys for in the car should be soft: cloth books, finger/hand puppets, etc.)
No matter what, try to have faith that this is just a stage in his development & he must not be turned forward-facing for AT LEAST another 6 months; if it isn't illegal in your state to turn him FF before 12 months it is still just very unwise because it is the law of physics that matter most). Car accidents are the #1 cause of death for children -- the American Academy of Pediatrics & National Highway Traffic Safety Administration have policy statements that children should remain RF until they reach the maximum weight/height limits of their seats (convertible RF/FF carseats last until 30-35 pounds RF). Some countries require kids stay RF until about 3-5 years old & there's never been a recorded case of leg/foot injury from extended RF, but many cases of serious/fatal neck/spine injury from FF too soon
You can have your DH browse through the following information & he could also visit a local Child Passenger Safety Technician for free info/help....
Best of luck to you all
