Harness seat for almost 5 y/o

I have been in a car seat war with a family member who had her infant FF at 8.5 months and almost 5 year old in a backless booster since about 2. She has since said she turned her now 1 year old back RF, but the 4 year old is still in a backless booster (shoulder belt behind the shoulder and lap belt in his tummy). She states he is "too heavy and tall for a harnessed seat." While I know he could easily fit in the FR85 or a Radian, but she will not invest in a seat of that cost and received one seat from the state (booster) and the other was a Britax Marathon hand me down I believe (which she has taken upon herself to create a cover over the existing). Myself and several friends (one a CPST) have suggest she head to a check or contact a local CPST to help her install and/or discuss what is wrong with her older son's current seat, but she refuses. While I am irritated with her over her attitude concerning the safety of her children, I want to find a solution. Is there any other seat currently on the market, a little more affordable for a 4'4" 68lb child or will I have to suck it up as a loss and hope that nothing ever happens to her child?

Suggest a high back booster (Turbobooster would be great) and perhaps if you can speak directly to the 4.5yo about WHY he needs to keep the shoulder belt in front of him.

Thank you so much. She did mention she wanted to come to me to help install her RF properly (after several of my Facebook friends commented over and over to her about what was wrong and how to be safe) so I am going to take a peak at what booster she is actually using with him. For some reason I thought at one point she had a high back, but removed the back for whatever reason. If that isn't the case I will suggest the Turbobooster. I can also try talking to him, though I am not sure he really understands that to be safe he needs to have the shoulder strap on and she doesn't enforce it. I keep pointing out all the giveaways I find though that offer up FR85 or Radians because she loves entering them, with any luck I can help get him to safely sit in the booster until she either wins a better seat or I can drill it into her head that just because he has hit the minimum requirements for a seat means he can no longer use it. I think my problem is I know I used seats improperly in the past due to lack of knowledge and now that I know better I try to help spread the word.

There is nothing wrong, in my opinion, with being rather seriously graphic with a 5 year old (or nearly 5 year old) about what will happen to his insides when he slides forward and that lap belt slices his little belly and hurts his insides, so be sure to keep that lap belt under the arms of the booster and touching his thighs, and how his head can smack on the seat in front of him when his torso bends way forward because the shoulderbelt isn't there to hold him back, so keep that shoulder belt right across the save hard bones of his shoulder and chest.

If she can't or won't spend that much on a harnessed seat, at his size the best option beyond that is a high back booster. I'm surprised that that size the backless doesn't fit well though? Not taking maturity into consideration, but a backless should place the belt well on a kid that size. Are you sure of those stats? He's almost the size of my 75th percentile 9 year old!

That being said, a backless will give him more "containment", and if you are able to speak with the child directly, tell him why he should have the shoulder belt in front of him at all times. Kids that age are eager to please and just learning safety rules. They tend to be very big on them, so he may be the source to go to rather than his mother.

Karine said:

She states he is "too heavy and tall for a harnessed seat." While I know he could easily fit in the FR85 or a Radian

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A 52" child will not fit easily in a Radian. I don't blame her for not wanting to purchase one.

I agree that a properly used highbacked booster would be the best bet. My child, who is slightly smaller (at 9yo) finds the Turbo uncomfortable, but she's rather sensitive to being "squished". Maybe the new Evenflo Big Kid Sport? It's pretty cheap.

The evenflo big kid was at sears on clearance for 29 dollars last week you might wanna check that out if you have one around you...or go with the big kid sport

Thank you ladies so much. I am not sure I am 100% believing on his size, but she posted those stats when others just as big in car seat safety all came at her for posting he couldn't fit. My 4 y/o fits within the requirements for both seats and if I recall the last time they stood next to each other there was not much difference in their height. She has told me I am attacking her, but I am just upset and never comment directly to her, she comments on safety facts and laws I post on my Facebook wall. I even admit to my making similar mistakes without having the knowledge I have now. I honestly think she just does not care about it because every reply myself or others have given her has come back with another excuse to why not instead of even contemplating the options we have given. I guess we shall see when she next visits if she has actually listened to anything we have said.