Need advice for travel with a carseat hating 21 month old

Hi,
We are heading to Mexico in a couple of weeks with our DD who is 21 months. She has traveled a lot and we always brought her car seat on the plane which worked until she was 18 months old. On that flight she was mad that she was stuck in the seat and it didn't help her sleep (even though we flew during nap time). The seat (Roundabout 50) took up a lot of room and she wouldn't sit in it without a fight. Honestly, it was a disaster. Since then we have flown a few times and we have not brought a car seat on the plane. owever, we've had a seat at our destination.The flights were not really pleasant but they were better. She still didn't sleep (maybe it's too stimulating?) but she had more freedom.

I'm really torn on what to do for this flight. It's 4 hours, over her nap time. We will be taking a car from the airport to the hotel and then we will not be in a car again. On the way home the flight is in the evening and we land at 9 PM (she goes to bed at 7). In an ideal world, she would sleep on the plane.

She is not the type of kid that things carseat = has to sit in it. She doesn't spend a lot of time in the car (I WOTH so she is really only in the car for errands on weekends). She's a strong willed kid an on the flight at 18 months she screamed for over an hour straight. It was so stressful.

Is there a seat that maybe would make her more comfortable on the plane? I was thinking that if maybe she could use the tray table that she would be happier about it.

I realize that I am the mom and she should have to stay in her seat but when I am trapped on a plane I really want to do anything to keep her happy/quiet.

Any advice/tips would be greatly appreciated. My DH is super hesitant to fly with her because of our previous experiences. Unfortunately, my family is across the country. I feel like if this trip is a fail we will not be going anywhere for a long time.

What seat does she ride in in your vehicle? Have you considered rear facing her on the plane so that she would be facing you? It might be easier on everyone so that you can entertain or soothe as needed because you'll be eye to eye.

Otherwise, the first seat that comes to mind that might enable her to use the tray table would be the Randian. I'm not an experienced flyer though and have only flown once. We used a scenera rear facing for the longer flight and my dd was almost 3 at the time, but it was really helpful to be able to look at her face to face during the flight.

She rides RF in a BLVD at home. We did try her RF on the plane, as well as FF (switched it mid flight, it was that bad) and it didn't make a difference.

I'm thinking that @ 18-21 months, it wouldn't matter what seat. Staying in one place at that age is just plain BAD/AWFUL/TORTURE (in the opinion of the child ).

That said, she IS going to be on a 4 hour flight and for the peace and sanity of you and all the other passengers, you need a plan:

1) SHOPPING! New and novel (not necessarily expensive) is the key here. Stickers, post-it notes, slinky, hot wheels/small cars, koosh ball, lacing toy w/large beads, finger puppets, Color Wonder Markers, Duplos, magna doodle, small puzzles, books, a portable DVD player, Ipod (or similar device loaded with music and books on tape).

[I realize many of these items are NOT toddler safe, but since you will be seated and interacting with DD when she is using them, it shouldn't be a problem.]

I'd probably wrap some of these items in cheap paper as most kids this age also LOVE tearing paper.

I gave my electronic Yahtzee to a cranky toddler next to me on a plane. The beeping about put me over the edge, but it was WAY BETTER than his fussing/screaming.

2) Make sure she gets plenty of moving around time before/after you get on the plane. Bring a ball, have her push her stroller, play tag/hide & go seek in an empty gate area.

3) Bring DD's security item (blanket/stuffed animal) that she associates with sleep/nap time.

4) Snacks!

5) Do you have a spare seat that you can use as a seat in the house? My thinking is that maybe if she can be "more" accustomed to being in the harness for chunks of time, she'll be better on the plane. I'm not saying park her in front of the TV, but use it like a booster seat or high chair. Have her near you while you cook, so you can interact with her, but she is seated/confined.

these are all great ideas, thank you! we have a roundabout 50 as our spare seat that we usually use for travel (got it when they were on clearance at target!). it's a pretty heavy seat though. would you recommend getting a different seat for travel? i heard that the safety 1st avenue is low enough that it will allow the tray table.

i love the idea of wrapping her toys. she will love that!

the one tip that someone gave us that helped us last time were to have suckers on hand. i actually need to go pick up some more dum dums. the sucking helped during take off and landing. plus it's totally novel to her which is always a plus

Unregistered said:

these are all great ideas, thank you! we have a roundabout 50 as our spare seat that we usually use for travel (got it when they were on clearance at target!). it's a pretty heavy seat though. would you recommend getting a different seat for travel? i heard that the safety 1st avenue is low enough that it will allow the tray table.

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I wouldn't, but then I'm cheap that way: the seat still fits DD and you know it will install on the plane. Besides I'd rather spend the $$ on the trip than on another seat.

I've only traveled with seats once (and as the 3rd adult, no less): a Scenera for a 1 yr old and an MA for a tiny 7 yr old with special needs. We stacked/nested the CRs in the stroller and carried the baby.

Others around here suggest using a bungee to attach the seat to a luggage carrier and pulling it that way. BTW - DON'T use the LATCH or harness to PU or carry the seat.)

We travel with a Scenera and a Radian. I believe the Scenera is cousin to the Avenue but the Avenue has a longer seat back? If that's the case, it will not allow the tray to be used. The Radian is the only seat I know of that allows the tray to be used due to it's low profile. I really like the Scenera due to it's cheap price and incredibly lightweight, it's also a dream to install on the plane. We fly a lot but have cut back drastically since DC2 (22 m/o) HATES flying. He screams, yells, screeches and barfs on EVERY flight. It's awful, I feel your pain. We also live a good flight away from family and it makes seeing them very stressful. The best solution we have found so far (though not ideal and doesn't always work) is bringing a DVD and burning a bunch of DVDs with his favourite shows.

Honestly, I think it's partially an age thing and they will outgrow this. DC1 was/is a great flyer but he too went through a more difficult stage where all he wanted to do was walk up and down the aisles. Again not ideal, but if it's not turbulent and they aren't serving food/drinks, it's WAY better than a screaming child.

Good luck!

flipper68 said:

SHOPPING! New and novel (not necessarily expensive) is the key here. Stickers, post-it notes, slinky, hot wheels/small cars, koosh ball, lacing toy w/large beads, finger puppets, Color Wonder Markers, Duplos, magna doodle, small puzzles, books, a portable DVD player, Ipod (or similar device loaded with music and books on tape).

Click to expand...

I don't have LOs of my own and have never flown with one (I mean one that I am responsible for), but I was SO. VERY. GLAD. that the parents with their 2 year old across the aisle from me did this kind of thing.

I swear that mom was whipping something different every ten minutes. None of it was particularly spectacular, and most are things you mentioned in this list. It was a 5 hour flight and (much to the chagrin of her parents), she didn't sleep a wink. That little girl ripped individual post it notes off an entire stack for at least 20 minutes. Then she took great pleasure in sticking them to any reachable surface.

Of course she fussed a little bit here and there, but she was far quieter than I expected she'd be and the parents were commended by several people when they deplaned.