I goofed . . DD1 wants to FF:-(

DD1 has a while before I have to FF her in the Radian XTSL based on weight and height (she is currently 39#, 41" (13.5" torso) and has about 3" clearance above her head).

Unfortunately, I had a mild panic attack one evening last week about how our Radian XTSL would fit in our vehicle forward facing. I worried about this b/c our 95 Odyssey has rigid, high belt stalks and I wasn't sure how it marry with the low profile of the seat.

Therefore, I tested it. I FF the car seat and, to my amazement, if fit perfectly--nice, tight fit. Shortly thereafter, I realized that I had to rush to the bank before it closed and threw the kids in the car. DD1 asked why I had her seat turned around and I explained that I just wanted to see how it fit. I told her that I had to go to the bank and she can sit in the car seat like this for now. While riding in the seat, she says "I love my seat this way." I asked her why and she said "because it's special." I'm not sure what she meant by "special." Maybe "different than usual?"

After the trip to the bank, I immediately RFed her car seat. However, everyday since then she is asking whether her seat can be turned back around saying that she loves it that way.

I feel I really goofed up b/c DD1 never complained of Rfing or expressed a desire to FF. She'll be 4 in September. What do you guys think?

• turn her now
• wait until she is 4 and FF her
• keep her RF until she maxes out and explain that she is safer this way

Please learn from my mistake:-( Looking back on it, I should have waited until she was napping to play with the car seat.

Personally? I'd tell her that she can FF when she turns four. She'll be over 40lbs by then and I think that's a perfectly acceptable age and size to FF. Heck, if we could only get people to wait until 4 and 40lbs to booster let alone FF. Just my personal opinion though. :twocents:

Get a "special" new something that hangs on the back of the seat her car seat is on. Like a plush monkey with velcro hands and legs that could hang on the headrest. That toy can live in the car and will only work if she's rear facing and can see it. If its just the novelty of ff (sounds like maybe it is) I would hold off until she hits the weight limit. She'll have fun with the novelty whenever you turn her.

April said:

Personally? I'd tell her that she can FF when she turns four. She'll be over 40lbs by then and I think that's a perfectly acceptable age and size to FF. Heck, if we could only get people to wait until 4 and 40lbs to booster let alone FF. Just my personal opinion though. :twocents:

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I agree. :thumbsup:

DD2 was month older when I flipped her the first time. I was seeing how the YS installed and managed to injure and already sore back so I couldn't take it out so she FF for about 3 weeks. She didn't ride that much during that because I wasn't comfortable driving so it was mostly trips to and from school. She loved it. However, when I was finally able to play merry go carseats again and took them all out I asked which one she wanted back in. It was the RN and RF. She went back to RF and is telling me she will FF when she is "bigger".

The point of my story? It is likely a novelty thing and a child who has been RF this long likely finds it comfortable and will probably be willing to revert back

The same thing happened to us, and DD is exactly the same age. She rode FF for 3.5 hours on a long distance drive. Then she asked it about everyday for the next week and a half and before this time, she had never mentioned it once since she'd never done or seen her seat do it.

Second half of week 2 she asked a little less, only once in week 3, once week 4, etc. Now it's been about 2 months and she only asks every couple weeks. Actually, she doesn't ask, she says, "you said you were going to turn my seat backwards" because the first time I stopped her complaining by telling her I'd flip it back "later".

Now I just tell her that that the instructions say she is supposed to stay this way, RF and that when her head gets closer to the top we will flip it. I don't link it to our long trip or anything special as I don't want another long trip or special occasion to prompt her to say, "hey, isn't it time now?"

It's not like she's devastated or anything when she asks and I say no. It's usually because she's tired or hungry in the early morning on the way to my parents house or on the way home at the end of the day and she's using it as something to grumble about.

On the flip side, I'd have no problem ff'ing her at her age and with her verbally asking to ff. See if it's just a passing thing if you want, but there is nothing wrong with choosing to ff her now. You're past the highest risk period already so I wouldn't stress about it or feel guilty if you turn her.

If it helps any, ds has been ff'ing in our truck for a couple months, and turned ff'ing in our car about a month ago or so. I don't have any regrets or concerns about him at all. He has recently jumped to 33lbs, but was 30lbs when I turned him, so he could've rf'ed longer.

There comes a point where there's nothing wrong with ff'ing a kid based on parental preference, and your dd is past that age IMO. She's not going to be in mortal danger if you choose to turn her ff'ing. And if she really wants to ff, I think she is old enough to contribute to the discussion at her age.

Thanks!

I think I'm going to take all your advice and jumble it together--I'll wait and see if it's a passing thing, get her a cute stuffed bear or monkey to hang on the seat this week, turn her at 4 if she is still begging or tell her that she can stay "comfortable" like her baby sister (she always wants to do what DD2 does, and let the chips fall where they may.

Thanks again