In yoir opinion...

jennzee

New member
Dh and I had an interesting, late-night discussion about car seats and safety in general. He asked me why I thought the vast majority of people put little minimal thought and research into their carseat purchase and practices. I had some thoughts--probably a bit skewed and maybe even unfair on some points--simply because where I am now in how I think and what I know, but I'm curious what other people think. In my mind, one of the single-most dangerous things we do with our kids on a daily basis is drive in the car...so it just makes sense to me to at least be somewhat informed about how to best protect them. What's your opinion on why don't most people don't take the initiative to learn about how?
 
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Brianna

New member
I think a good part of it is thinking it won't happen to me, and that if your kid is in any sort of car seat then that's safe enough.
 

CMeMeC

New member
I have talked to a couple moms lately with 1 year olds who are ff. They both seem to have a careless "it won't happen to me attitude. " I also got the impression that what I do is "extreme" and unnecessary and their kids are perfectly safe because they are in seats (neither inatalled or used correctly). One of the dads is a state trooper with a know it all attitude and feels above the law, his 10 month old was ff and his install is atrocious, but he thinks he knows best and is right. I am not sure why more people don't seem to care more. I know with my kids, I make a lot of mistakes, but I am always trying to educate myself and do better by them.
 

SnoGurl

New member
I was talking about this during a check the other day, the girl suggested it was because we learn so much of our parenting skills from our parents, and she thought car safety was one of the things that haad changed the most, in the shortest period of time. I thought that was interesting.
 

arly1983

New member
I was talking about this during a check the other day, the girl suggested it was because we learn so much of our parenting skills from our parents, and she thought car safety was one of the things that haad changed the most, in the shortest period of time. I thought that was interesting.

I think this, too.

I also hear a lot of: "I didn't have a carseat when I was little and I'm fine. My kids are much safer than I was. "
 
I think this, too. I also hear a lot of: "I didn't have a carseat when I was little and I'm fine. My kids are much safer than I was. "

When I hear people say that I usually come back with a gentle "the ones who weren't fine aren't here to tell us about it, and believe me there are lots".
 

T4K

New member
I think it's because of he many conflicting messages...

Local laws
Car seat manufacturers
Physics
Federal Organizations
Historical advice
 

RomErin

New member
I know a good friend of mine turns her kids FF at one year and puts them in boosters at age 4. Her theory is that her husband is a firefighter and has been to a lot of MVAs and he's seen if a kid is any kind of child restraint they've been fine.... Not a risk I chose to take with my children.
 

1mommy

New member
I think a good part of it is thinking it won't happen to me, and that if your kid is in any sort of car seat then that's safe enough.

I agree with this. I have 2 friends that FF at 11 months, whom I sent information on why RF is better, but they thanked me for the information and continued doing what they wanted (as is their right as a parent). It makes me a little sad that doing something so simple as not doing anything (keeping your kid RF) can make their kid 500% safer in the are that is the number 1 killer of children, and people don't care or think that it is important.
 

sm1982

New member
I think there's just so much bad information out there. A lot of it comes from the people you normally turn to for advice - doctors, police officers and other parents. I've seen parents in Babies R Us ask teenage employees for advice (most 18yr old boys aren't going to know the reasons why your tiny four year-old shouldn't go into a booster). Plus like someone else mentioned, car seats and the use of car seats have changed pretty fast. So extended rear-facing, harnessing or boostering is still seen as extreme. I think for people that have never been in a major accident or had someone close to them hurt in an accident, they think it won't happen to them. They don't drink & drive or drive recklessly.. so they're safe (because drunk drivers never kill anyone else).
 

_juune

New member
Dh and I had an interesting, late-night discussion about car seats and safety in general. He asked me why I thought the vast majority of people put little minimal thought and research into their carseat purchase and practices. I had some thoughts--probably a bit skewed and maybe even unfair on some points--simply because where I am now in how I think and what I know, but I'm curious what other people think. In my mind, one of the single-most dangerous things we do with our kids on a daily basis is drive in the car...so it just makes sense to me to at least be somewhat informed about how to best protect them. What's your opinion on why don't most people don't take the initiative to learn about how?
I think at least part of it is that many people see the car seat about the same way they see a stroller or a high-chair, just another piece of baby equipment [the other two have harness too, right? and come with a manual?]. So it just doesn't occur to them that there is more to it than just somehow strapping the seat in the car and the child in the seat.
Who reads manuals anyway? :p
 

CMeMeC

New member
My sil actually said "I am a good driver and never had an accident. She is fine." I rode with her once. First and last time. I was terrified.
 

bree

Car-Seat.Org Ambassador
I think at least part of it is that many people see the car seat about the same way they see a stroller or a high-chair, just another piece of baby equipment [the other two have harness too, right? and come with a manual?]. So it just doesn't occur to them that there is more to it than just somehow strapping the seat in the car and the child in the seat.
Who reads manuals anyway? :p

I think that carseats are viewed as another piece of baby equipment is a key point. I think it's seen as baby equipment to restrain a child while the car's in motion, not as possible protection in a crash. I think it's why people are so quick to turn 11 or 12 month olds forward-facing even after hearing about extended rear-facing and why it's not unheard of for people to say their kids' neck muscles are strong enough for forward-facing. I think sometimes people think rear-facing is the safer way for infants to travel in the car (as in, their neck muscles can't hold up their heads while the cars are moving); there isn't any connection that rear-facing is the safer way to be riding in a crash, because carseats are viewed as the place to contain the kid while driving.
 

jennzee

New member
You guys have echoed many of the things I told him. My first response was "Because they're lazy" :)eek: judgmental much?), but sometimes I honestly think (especially when talking to his family) that they simply don't want to take the time. His youngest sister recently moved her 1 year old into a convertible. Of the four of us who have kids under the age of two, only hers and mine are still RF'ing because she was too overwhelmed to even know how to choose a new seat, so she called me and just asked me to do it (she also told me that buying ketchup and cereal makes her feel incredibly overwhelmed, so there's that :rolleyes:). I offered to shop with her to make it easier, but she just wasn't interested, so I bought the seat, I read the manual, I taught her how to install it, and I told her he needs to stay RF'ing. I haven't seen her car since then, so she could very well have turned him by now like her sisters all do with their 1 year olds, but hopefully she at least heeded that bit of advice. They all just seem to have the attitude of "I don't know where to start", so they don't start at all.

We all start somewhere...I get that. I was far from best practice with my first three, but even then, compared to the norm, I at least sought out enough info to not turn them FF'ing the day they turned 1, and took the time to choose the best seat for our vehicle. I don't expect the average person to know as much about carseats as those of us here do, but I'm sometimes baffled by not only the complete lack of knowledge, but the complete apathy toward at least learning the basics.
 

jennzee

New member
I think at least part of it is that many people see the car seat about the same way they see a stroller or a high-chair, just another piece of baby equipment [the other two have harness too, right? and come with a manual?]. So it just doesn't occur to them that there is more to it than just somehow strapping the seat in the car and the child in the seat.
Who reads manuals anyway? :p

I know so many people though who will put hours of research into finding just the right stroller, but put hardly any thought at all into their carseats.

I do think you're right about the manual part though...it can't be that hard, so why read the instructions?
 

sarahlove

New member
Some people truly are too lazy to research or even care.
My parents' car was hit and my mom was talking to some of her coworkers(intensive care unit doctors and nurses) and they all think she's crazy that a.) she told the insurance she would need to replace the carseat in her car and b) dd was still rf at 18 months.

My ex has a 12 month old who has been ff for months. I told him dd was still rf and he said "she's already one and over 20lbs." I told him it was safer and she would stay that way for awhile. He agreed that she would rf if in his car but said he would not rf his son.
 

Kel

Well-known member
Don't want be the negative one here, BUT lots of people are lazy and don't care.
I know many of these people personally, and its frustrating. Like the person that took my MR and FFed their one year old in. THEN didn't buckle the seat in. Just threw the cars seat belt across baby, without buckling it either!
Why, because it's easier.
Same reason a couple of kids a know ride in lbb's at 2-3 yrs old. It's easier.
I've showed the videos etc and people look so preseptive. But when the time comes the pick the easiest route.
This all sounds rude, but I'm 38 and have only met 1 other person that RFs past 1. And most people I know hbb by 2 and lbb by 3.
 

Kel

Well-known member
Also, these same people wanted to make sure I carried bleach wipes for their child while eating out. So they didn't catch a germ from a public place, lol.
 

LC2003

New member
I think you could ask this question about ANY parenting decision. It just happens that asking it here on car-seat.org makes it be about the best/safest car seats. If you asked on a breastfeeding forum, you'd get the same sort of discussion of why people don't breastfeed, and on a natural birth forum, why people don't have natural births, etc.

I wish I knew why people didn't try their hardest on any given topic, but they just don't. It's probably a very unique combination of experiences that makes any one person interested in one specific issue, so that you can't tease out any rhyme or reason. And I don't think that in most cases, it is global "not caring" or "not researching." As you can see, some parents obsess over germs but don't care about car safety.
 

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