I wish I had the courage to speak up...

momofmandp · Jun 9, 2009

Today I was at Target and decided to go check out the car seat section. There was a lady there looking at a booster. She looked at the specs and said, "Oh, it says 30 lbs...he still has 7 pounds to go." She then calls someone and says, "Hi, I'm here at Target and I'm looking at the seat you wanted me to get. It's on sale for $40 from $60. But it says that it's for 30 lbs and XXXX is only 23 lbs...................Oh, you think it's still ok? OK, I'll get it then." :jaw: I know that I should have said something...I waited around for a while trying to get up the courage to say something, but she was still on the phone and I didn't want to look like I was stalking her, so I finally left. On hindsight though, I'm thinking I really should have said something and feeling really guilty about it. It's bad enough if someone wants to put a 30 lber in a booster, but this poor child isn't even 30 lbs. A 23 lber could possibly be around 2 years old or so - definitely not mature enough to possibly sit in a booster safely....most certainly not big enough.

thepeach80 · Jun 9, 2009

That's tough. I'm a tech and have problems sometimes.

AJ was 23# at 10 mos old, Ilana was 18 mos, and Evan was 23 mos. NOWHERE near booster age.

ketchupqueen · Jun 9, 2009

I saw a woman buying a TB for her 2 1/2 year old the other day. I told her, "That's really not an appropriate seat for a child that age." She said, "Oh, no, it goes by weight!" I gave her my card and explained that I'm a tech. We talked about the function of harnesses, appropriate choices for tall children, etc. When I left she still had it in her cart (her daughter wanted a "pretty one" and was "refusing to sit in her seat," sigh) but I did the best I could.

MamaLinzie · Jun 9, 2009

Ive only gotten up the courage to approach a stranger twice, and they were both very positive experiences. I don't think that very many people would be receptive to a stranger approaching them about car seats, so I just go with my instincts. I know it probably sounds weird, but if I get the feeling that they are going to be interested, I go with it.

DahliaRW · Jun 9, 2009

ketchupqueen said:
I saw a woman buying a TB for her 2 1/2 year old the other day. I told her, "That's really not an appropriate seat for a child that age." She said, "Oh, no, it goes by weight!" I gave her my card and explained that I'm a tech. We talked about the function of harnesses, appropriate choices for tall children, etc. When I left she still had it in her cart (her daughter wanted a "pretty one" and was "refusing to sit in her seat," sigh) but I did the best I could.

The TB is a 3/30 seat, so techinically it's not being used properly and is probably illegal to use in most states.

momto2princes · Jun 9, 2009

I would have felt/done the same as you.
That is a tough spot to be in that is for sure.
I have tried to help others and it seems a 50/50 outcome between responsive and looking at me like I have 2 heads.
I use to have a really hard time when conversations didn't go well or parents didn't listen but I had to just tell myself I did what I could and that you can't save every child (even though we all want to) so I just make sure that my children are as safe as possible along with any other child that rides in my vehicle. Beyond that I still try but I don't beat myself up if they don't see my view.

It is a sticky situation.

jheimes · Jun 9, 2009

We can only hope that she was buying it for future use because it was on sale on not to use at 23 lbs.

brightredmtn · Jun 9, 2009

DahliaRW said:
The TB is a 3/30 seat, so techinically it's not being used properly and is probably illegal to use in most states.

Yeah that's a bit gray California. Basically the actual law just states your kid has to be properly restrained in the back seat if they're under 6 and 60lbs. Doesn't really say properly restrained in what or how.

To the OP, I sometimes joke that the only reason I became a tech was to have more credibility in the car seat aisle at Target! What do you have to loose, just be nice and talk to the people. They won't bite, they may not listen but they won't bite.

starbuck8088 · Jun 9, 2009

Every so often I get up the nerve to talk to someone in the car seat aisle... not very often tho. Most of the time I just stand there playing with the seats and then wish I'd said something once the person's long gone.

Last week I was at Target occupying myself while my little brother was shopping, and a grandmother was there trying to decide between an Evenflo Big Kid and a TurboBooster. When she got off the phone I got up the nerve to ask her the age of the child. She said he was ONE! I showed her some seats that would be more appropriate for a one year old (She didn't realize that the boosters didn't have harnesses).

But last month a BRU, I tried to talk to a lady buying a 30 lb 3 year old a booster, and she just said "Well this one says 30 lbs" and looked at me like I was nuts. So DH grabbed the MyRide for me and we left.

Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. But it can be worth it. I really need to find a Tech class...

Mama Jo · Jun 9, 2009

I'm not a tech, so I really have no credibility to fall back on. In that situation, I probably wouldn't have said anything. I do step in and offer my opinion to people when they're debating between say, an EFTA and a GN for a 1 year old. And it helps, since I'm not a tech, that I own alot of seats so I can honestly say I have personal experience with them. And I tell them about the research I've done about ERF and EH, and then mention when and where the next local carseat check is being held, so they can have their seat (whatever they decide to buy) inspected for free.

One time I stepped in and interrupted a BRU employee who was trying to install a GN RF on the test bench for a couple with a baby that was clearly under the age of 1. Duh.

ketchupqueen · Jun 10, 2009

DahliaRW said:
The TB is a 3/30 seat, so techinically it's not being used properly and is probably illegal to use in most states.

We are a proper use state, but I didn't want to point out the 3 because she'll be 3 in September and I didn't want her mom to un-harness her then.

I just teach best practice and it's the parent's choice, regardless of the law. I don't use the law as a club because frankly, it's an ineffectual weapon.

mjbrox · Jun 10, 2009

momofmandp said:
Today I was at Target and decided to go check out the car seat section. There was a lady there looking at a booster. She looked at the specs and said, "Oh, it says 30 lbs...he still has 7 pounds to go." She then calls someone and says, "Hi, I'm here at Target and I'm looking at the seat you wanted me to get. It's on sale for $40 from $60. But it says that it's for 30 lbs and XXXX is only 23 lbs...................Oh, you think it's still ok? OK, I'll get it then." :jaw: I know that I should have said something...I waited around for a while trying to get up the courage to say something, but she was still on the phone and I didn't want to look like I was stalking her, so I finally left. On hindsight though, I'm thinking I really should have said something and feeling really guilty about it. It's bad enough if someone wants to put a 30 lber in a booster, but this poor child isn't even 30 lbs. A 23 lber could possibly be around 2 years old or so - definitely not mature enough to possibly sit in a booster safely....most certainly not big enough.

The way I would have approached it, and I have actually done this

Do not start with a lecture or lesson about seats. It will make you come across as a know it all crazy mom car seat nazi.

Instead, try saying something like.

“WOW, all these choices and confusing weight ranges……..”

“Do you ever get confused from all this? “

This is where they will inevably say yea, it is annoying blab la bla

Now lead into the following

“I just read a study about the benefits of a rear facing seat up to 35 lbs, it was fascinating…..bla bla bla”

“Have you considered (or heard of) having the child rear facing up to 35lbs”They will say no, and probably think it is silly.

Then you say

“Well, the study made sense to me, I am defiantly going rear facing. You might want to check it out”

Anyway, I think that is a better way to approach the situation.

I will work on a script for BRU employees this afternoon. It is going to be more difficult and may physically beating your head against a wall in frustration.

rochelle · Jun 10, 2009

momofmandp said:
She then calls someone and says, "Hi, I'm here at Target and I'm looking at the seat you wanted me to get. It's on sale for $40 from $60. But it says that it's for 30 lbs and XXXX is only 23 lbs...................Oh, you think it's still ok? OK, I'll get it then."
A 23 lber could possibly be around 2 years old or so - definitely not mature enough to possibly sit in a booster safely....most certainly not big enough.

my boys were around that weight at 1yrs old.

lets hope the mum is buying to keep since its 33% off regular price. since the buyer is doing a favor for the mum its tough for her to get another seat also.

I wish I had the courage to speak up...

momofmandp

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thepeach80

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ketchupqueen

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MamaLinzie

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