Car Seat Lending/Borrowing ?

SGTex

New member
I need some opinions here, I'm curious to see what everyone's thoughts are.

I lent a friend (one of the little girls I babysit for) my Frontier to use. She outgrew her car seat and Mom and Dad hadn't purchased new ones yet. I was feeling a little guilty b/c they have to purchase 3 seats (one for Mom's car, Dad's car and a Radian for me) and I was very specific that the only seat that will work is a Radian and I felt bad about them having to purchase a specific seat. So while they were deciding what to order etc... I let them use my Frontier in one of their cars so she's only in a booster in one car (she's TOTALLY not booster ready at all) and I rearranged my seats so that she's riding in my Radian in my car.

My Frontier is BRAND NEW (did I say like BRAND BRAND NEW), but I knew I had to be OK with crumbs etc... letting them use it - I know they let their kids eat/drink in the car all the time. So I decided I could handle that and let them borrow it.

FFW to today, I asked yesterday for Mom to bring the seat and let me have it for the day - I wanted to play with it b/c I'm trying to decide if I'm going to use my Regents for a long trip we have coming up or if I'm going to get another Frontier and use them instead. So she brings it today - I get it out of the car, put it in my garage and later go out to install it in my car and I notice that the buckle (the red push button part) has something all over it. At first glance I thought it was just really dirty, then I realized it had been scribbled on with a black marker. :eek: I immediately tried to clean it off, but it's not coming off - I can also tell they tried to clean it, but it didn't come off at all.

I'm really upset that they didn't tell me it happened, especially since she was giving me the seat today. So I'm trying to decide if I'm validated in being upset over it and if I should do anything about it. I mean I know I lent it to her, but I also know if it had been the opposite way, I would have told them right away when it happened and I would have replaced the buckle for them (even though it still works) I would have done this even if the seat was old and not in good shape in the first place! (Except that this would never have happened to me b/c I would NEVER let my kids have markers in the car period. Not to mention while riding in someone else's $300 brand new car seat! And Mom knows what a freak I am about my seats and that I don't even really let the kids eat my car! :whistle:)

Now my question is, do I tell her I'm replacing the buckle and ask for them to pay for it? And do I give her the seat back? I don't have anything else to give her (except a booster) b/c I need my Radian installed and my kids need their Regents - Mikey is too big for the harness on the Frontier and I will not let go of my Madison Regent (besides Julia would KILL me - she's a bit attached to her seat! :rolleyes:) I hate to have them put her in a harness with me knowing, but geesh, I don't want to give them my Frontier back! :(

Also, I'm not irritated about this and would never say anything, but if you were giving a car seat back to someone, wouldn't you have at least knocked the crumbs and cleaned up the spilt milk (dried in the cup holder) before they got it back? :thumbsdown:
 
ADS

Splash

New member
I'd tell her you were concerned with the condition of the seat and you'd rather not give it back to her. It was something loaned, it was abused, now you're keeping it. You could say you'd like to be reimbursed for the cost of a new buckle, but I don't think you'd get it. It's their responsibility to budget for the cost of seats for their child. Also, how often do you watch her? Occasionally, then they should provide you a seat to use then. Every day? Then it's your responsibility to provide your own seat. Especially when you want such a specific seat.
 

christineka

New member
FWIW I don't even allow my kids to have markers, yet my ds somehow got one, smuggled it into the van, and drew on his nearly brand new car seat. I don't like the way it looks, but there is nothing wrong with it safety wise, so I let it go. I tried rubbing alcohol and magic eraser. Neither worked at all.

Now, if the seat were borrowed I would call the lendee and confess, then ask what they want me to do about it.

If I was anal about food spills and such in my car seats I would not lend to anyone that would let their kid eat and drink in the car. I don't lend my seats. (Then again, I only have two spares anyway.)
 

carseatcoach

Carseat Crankypants
If my child drew on the buckle, I'd replace it before returning it.

But. I agree that it's not a safety issue, and most people don't care about how their carseats look -- at least not as much as most of us do here. (I personally would not replace a buckle because of scribbling.) I'd let it go and not lend your seats again.

I also agree with Splash that if only one -- fairly expensive -- seat will do for your vehicle, you should provide it.
 

SGTex

New member
Thanks for the opinions!

I do watch this girl full-time (during the school year) however it was understood up front that they would provide me with a proper car seat that would work in my car b/c I drive her to and from preschool daily. They didn't complain about replacing their car seats and they are very appreciative about the knowledge that I have shared with them about car seat safety.

And I know I'm too anal and I was trying to let it go a bit, knowing that she'd be way safer in this seat and I knew stains/food etc... was part of the deal, but not marker!

I am off to try a magic earaser! Hope it works!
 

SGTex

New member
Magic Eraser is AWESOME! Wow! Thanks so much for the idea Jennee! I'm just going to tell her that I got the marker off, but I am not going to give her the seat back, I'll just offer the use of one of my HBB if they need one to get home.
 

Jennee

New member
im glad the magic eraser worked for you. i love those things! i even gave some to a friend as a christmas gift, id been telling her to get some but she never would so i just gave them to her, she has tried them now and gone and bought more.
 

jujumum

Well-known member
I was going to suggest the magic eraser, too - I'm so glad it worked!

I've had rotten experiences lending out chain saws, shop vacs, pack n plays, a man's mountain bicycle helmet, and car seats. Unfortunately, not everyone's version of 'clean' is the same, and although I have lent theses things out in near perfect condition, they have all come back filthy (in my opinion). I have a friend that I will no longer lend seats to because of the condition that they would come back in (not that I have any to spare at the moment anyway, but if I did, I would come up with some excuse of why I needed it).

P.S. As you can imagine, we never asked for the sweaty $150 bike helmet back. Ick. Who asks to borrow a bike helmet? :confused: Double ick.
 

daniele_ut

New member
I never lend anything out to anyone that I would be crushed to get back ruined. I have learned that lesson the hard way. I do have a few good friends to whom I would lend anything, though. When one of my friends got bleach on one of my favorite maternity shirts she returned it with a check for $20 to replace it, which I totally appreciated.
 

cookie123

New member
Of course I'm quite a bit older than most of you, if not all, but I've learned something valuable in those years. Many things, actually lol!! One is - Don't loan out your car seats if you value them!!
 

christineka

New member
I tried the magic eraser on ds' seat again. I wonder if I have a dud of an eraser because it didn't remove anything.
 

jujumum

Well-known member
I tried the magic eraser on ds' seat again. I wonder if I have a dud of an eraser because it didn't remove anything.

The magic eraser works with water as a mild abrasive and works best on plastic or other hard surfaces. If the marker is on places other than the plastic, it might not work.
 

rochelle

New member
christineka,

off topic but a erasable marker always worked for me. as in color the perm marker stain with a erasable marker and than just wipe off with a tissue/napkin.


SGTex,

my mum returns anything she borrows in more pristine condition than she borrows :) I try to do that most of the time but I rarely borrow stuff as I know its hard to keep borrowed things in pristine condition.

we never lend our car seats out even when we had spares. we just gave the spares away. DH is scared of any "abuse" the borrowed car seat may have suffered.
 

4boysmom

New member
Car seats are one of those things I think I would be weary to loan out. Some random person a few houses down asked to borrow a car seat so he could run to the groc store to get diapers or some such and I was such a mess while he was gone for the 20 minutes... I installed the seat and properly buckled the kid for the ride to the store so dad only had to get it right once in the return trip. It was an EFTA so I am not sure what I thought he could have done but I was worried he'd break it or something. I guess with a friend you feel like you know them but since I am a bit of a car seat freak I am not sure I would trust many people to not wash covers/straps while well meaning/me seeming like a b!tch giving a laundry list of "how to use's"/do/don't do's.
 

andre149

New member
From the other side of this... I just can't believe she gave you the seat back in that condition. I am borrowing the Keyfit I'm using from a friend, and I can't imagine doing that. No doubt it's going to get spit up on (being an infant seat and all), but I completely plan on cleaning everything on it before giving it back, and if anything happens to the seat I am prepared to replace it.

I certainly wouldn't give her your seat back... if they need seats for their car they can supply them since they trashed yours. Do you plan on keeping the Radian once you're done watching their child? If so maybe you could give them some of the money for that so they could buy a decent seat for one of their cars...
 

Blondie87

New member
I have have only loaned out my seat once, for like an hour or 2. To my neighbor right across from me at my apartments. Her DH was supposed to leave the car seat (comfortsport) cuz she was going to go somewhere with her friend but he forgot to. She has a 28 lb almost 3 year old. FF. They actually installed the seat correctly and buckled her in correctly! I was shocked. But happy! :)

Judi and I have swapped seats before and I always make sure to keep her seats clean, although my kiddos eat and drink in the car, if her seat got dirty I would clean it up. I am borrowing her Nauti and it was dirty when I got it, so I cleaned it up for her... :)

But yeah.. I would not accept that. I can't believe she'd give it back to you like that. It was an awesome thing for you to do, letting her borrow your brand new Frontier. The least she can do is keep it as clean as when she got it. If I was borrowing someone's seat that 1- was brand new, and 2- they usually didn't have food or drinks in the car.. I prolly wouldn't even give my kids food or drinks in that seat so they wouldn't mess it up. That was extremely ungrateful for her to do that. I wouldn't give it back...
 

Melodiya99

New member
Ok, I'm going to be the odd one out here...Since you only asked her the day before to bring it the next day, maybe she didn't get a chance to clean it up when she otherwise would have. And maybe she just temporarily forgot to mention the buckle thing...I've totally done that before! Just recently I broke my friend's pestle and didn't remember to mention it for about a whole week! :eek: I felt really bad, but sometimes things just slip your mind.

I say, don't be too harsh on her. I would be willing to lend it back to her (it'd be keeping a kid safer:) but would definitely mention the buckle thing "Hey, I was able to get the marker off the buckle with a magic eraser...I'm so glad it came off easily...I really like to keep my seats in nice looking condition--that's why I don't let my kids eat or drink in it!" That way she gets the point, but it's not really so confrontive.
 

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