Making kids safer, one question at a time.  Welcome to the Car-Seat.Org community!   Motor Vehicle Crashes are the #1 cause of fatal injury for children and adults, age groups 1 to 34.   Selecting a safe car, minivan or SUV, plus correctly using child restraints and seatbelts may be the most important things you can do to protect your family.   Need help installing an infant, convertible or booster seat?   Looking for carseat reviews or compatibility advice? Need help buying the best and safest car seats for your baby, toddler or older kid?   No question is a bad one, so please click here to ask our experts a question and then join our friendly community of moms, dads, caregivers and advocates in the USA and Canada.   Thank you for visiting; buckle-up and drive safely!


 

Sponsored Ads

View Poll Results: Which would you use?

Voters
9. You may not vote on this poll
  • harness

    3 33.33%
  • booster

    6 66.67%
Results 1 to 12 of 12
  1. #1
    CPS Technician emandbri's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    St. Peters MO (burb of St. Louis)
    Posts
    2,948

    So torn what should I put Benjamin in this weekend?....

    We are going away next weekend and Elizabeth and Benjamin are going to stay with my MIL and my parents. Benjamin just turned 5 and is 43 lbs and 43 inches tall. I'm not worried about my mom I think the kids will ride fine with her but I'm not as sure about my MIL.

    Last time she had the kids we met halfway to get them. Benjamin had buckled himself in his marathon but my MIL didn't tighten the harness and they were out as far as they go! He rode for 20 min like that! Benjamin can buckle himself in but to do so he loosens the harness all the way out first. I'm not worried about Elizabeth because her harness will always stay the same.

    I was going to put him in a booster in her car for the weekend and he has used the monterey a few times in Brian's car. I haven't kept up with it though because he likes it! So he has been in a booster about 5 times total.

    When the straps were all the way out we had traded cars and she was driving my van. Benjamin sits in the very middle, maybe she will remember to tighten his harness when he is in her car and outboard? He can now tighten the harness but he isn't good about remembering to do so on his own.

    We will have the older two with us so we can't have them make sure he is okay.

    So what would you do? Put him in a harness or booster?

    Emily tech and mom to Jacob 16, Daniel 13, Benjamin 9, Elizabeth 6. Child care provider to 4 other kiddos.

  2. # ADS
    Sponsored Ads
    Join Date
    April, 2001
    Location
    Car-Seat.Org
    Posts
    Many
     
     

  3. #2
    CPS Technician MissAllyLou's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Woodbury, MN
    Posts
    851

    Re: So torn what should I put Benjamin in this weekend?....

    Okay this might sound stupid, but can you tighten his harness to almost where it needs to be, and then draw a line with a permanent marker or a pen or something. Then, teach Ben to look for that line, so he knows he's ready to go. Do you think he could remember something like that? The kids I watched all summer tried this with their new nanny this summer, since she never seemed to remember to do so. It worked really well, the 4 year old would tell the Nanny she couldn't find her pink line, and the nanny would then remember to tighten her harness. Do you think Ben could remember something like that?

    ETA: I'm talking about a line on the adjuster strap, lol, in case there's any confusion!
    Baby Hoagie V1.0 coming 9.13.13

  4. #3
    CPS Advocate
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Invisible, but right behind you
    Posts
    9,820

    Re: So torn what should I put Benjamin in this weekend?....

    I wouldn't trust MIL after a mistake like that. I'd make sure he could strap himself properly into the Monterey and use that instead.

  5. #4
    Carseat Crazy marchofemily's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Wisconsin
    Posts
    277

    Re: So torn what should I put Benjamin in this weekend?....

    If you're comfortable with the booster, I would use that.
    Tara~rearfacingrocks.webs.com
    Emily
    Elliot~7-22-09~4.5Yo,34lbs,38"
    ERF~Zebra BV70

  6. #5
    CPS Fanatic zeo2ski's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    upstate NY
    Posts
    1,196

    Re: So torn what should I put Benjamin in this weekend?....

    Had you told MIL anything about him needing help the first time? Maybe she didn't even check and assumed he knew how to do it. If you talked to her about it afterwards, was she receptive or kind of blow it off? Perhaps she just needs specific instructions--just be sure to place the "blame" on Benjamin's inability to remember the steps, not on MIL's incompetence, lol.

    Whichever seat you decide to use, I think she'll need some good solid reminders about how the seat is used and what help your son needs.

    But I just have to say, I love that you call him Benjamin--my Benjamin is 2 and I always wonder if he'll stay "Benjamin" or become a "Ben" in time. Oh, and his middle name is Jacob, his uncle is Daniel, and his passed-away-aunt was Elizabeth. So yeah, love your names!

  7. #6
    Carseat Crazy mommyto2angelgirls's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Connecticut
    Posts
    575

    Re: So torn what should I put Benjamin in this weekend?....

    i second the question of did you make her aware the first time and how did she handle it. also my daughter is almost 5 and is very vocal about her seat not being tight enough. have you told benjamin why it needs to be tight "so that he doesn't get a bad boo boo" and let him know he needs to remind grandma to tighten it. at 5 he should be able to vocalize what he needs unless he has a learning disability. perhaps you could put a sticker on the harness right near the buckle that says tighten me. or just have her do all the buckles for the weekend so the harness doesn't have to be loosened all the way.
    i would try to talk to mil about the harness if she isn't open to it or you don't feel she would tighten it then go with the booster as long as he knows how to have it properly on him. remember though do you need her to lock the seatbelt or anything with him in the booster.
    curious does you mother have her own seats...or do her and mil have to share? who will be moving the seat for you? do they know how?
    DD1~5yrs~43.5lbs~42 inches~14.5inch torso~FF in a MA, Nautilus and Apex 65
    DD2~23 months~26lbs~33inches~RF in a MA and EFTA
    Little girl I babysit~3yrs~30lbs~35inches~FF in an Evenflo Triumph
    Baby #3 due in Dec~infant seat TBD~any advice??

  8. #7
    CPS Technician emandbri's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    St. Peters MO (burb of St. Louis)
    Posts
    2,948

    Re: So torn what should I put Benjamin in this weekend?....

    You know I'm not sure if we said anything to her or not. We were both pretty stunned. I know he was buckling himself in at that point and I'm sure you guys are right that she probably thought he could do it all by himself. I'm just shocked that she didn't check to make sure it was done right.

    I did try him in the monterey today and purposely put the shoulder belt under both arms to see if he would fix it and he did. I was worried with the lack of practice in a booster that he wouldn't be sure how it worked.

    I'm going to work with him this week on him tightening the harness. With him sitting near me I get impatient and do it for him so I moved the seat his marathon is in back. I'm liking the line idea. I might use some tape instead so I don't mess up the strap. He does have some trouble figuring out exactly how tight they need to be so that would help! Thanks for the idea!

    My mom has seats she has a comfort sport and a cargo that she has used for Benjamin, Elizabeth, and my two nieces. Elizabeth is now 31 lbs so she would have to use the comfort sport forward facing and would obviously have to use the cargo forward facing as well. I thought about having her use one of them but I don't want have her forward facing and then fight me when I put her back rear-facing in my van. I could use the cargo as a booster for Benjamin but I think I'd rather just install a seat for him to use since I'm not worried about my mom not getting the straps tight.

    I have 3 marathons and a radian so I do have enough for a set in each car. My MIL doesn't have any seats and I'm going to install seats in her car. She really doesn't need her own seats because most of the time all the kids stay together so if she has to drive them we trade cars. She has a Camry and can't fit all the kids in it unless she puts Jacob in the front.

    Emily tech and mom to Jacob 16, Daniel 13, Benjamin 9, Elizabeth 6. Child care provider to 4 other kiddos.

  9. #8
    Moderator - CPS Technician safeinthecar's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    Bay Area California
    Posts
    6,605

    Re: So torn what should I put Benjamin in this weekend?....

    Tape won't work because the adjuster strap has to feed back through the adjuster for him to loosen the harness.
    Kimberly
    Proud mommy of Becky 18! Danny 15 Hope 12~Auntie to William-14, David-10, and Logan 2~

  10. #9
    CPS Technician emandbri's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    St. Peters MO (burb of St. Louis)
    Posts
    2,948

    Re: So torn what should I put Benjamin in this weekend?....

    Quote Originally Posted by safeinthecar View Post
    Tape won't work because the adjuster strap has to feed back through the adjuster for him to loosen the harness.
    Wow, I can't believe I didn't think about that. hum. I'm not too keen on drawing on the adjuster strap but I guess I could on the seat that is expiring in Jan.

    Emily tech and mom to Jacob 16, Daniel 13, Benjamin 9, Elizabeth 6. Child care provider to 4 other kiddos.

  11. #10
    CPS Technician emandbri's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    St. Peters MO (burb of St. Louis)
    Posts
    2,948

    Re: So torn what should I put Benjamin in this weekend?....

    Thanks all! We've decided the booster is the way to go. I have tried to get Benjamin to remember to tighten the harness and I keep having to remind him.

    Emily tech and mom to Jacob 16, Daniel 13, Benjamin 9, Elizabeth 6. Child care provider to 4 other kiddos.

  12. #11
    CPS Advocate Kat_Momof3's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Hampton Roads, Virginia
    Posts
    8,451

    Re: So torn what should I put Benjamin in this weekend?....

    Since it's not easy for her to remember and he's old enough and big enough in my mind to use it on a spare seat basis, I think you should just do what's easiest for your MIL and use the booster...

    So I agree with your decision.



    Check out my new hair blog - Ruthie-dos

  13. #12
    CPS Technician emandbri's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    St. Peters MO (burb of St. Louis)
    Posts
    2,948

    Re: So torn what should I put Benjamin in this weekend?....

    Sure enough my mom got all annoyed with me. She told my dad that I was putting other seats in the van because hers weren't "good enough." The kids have riden in those seats a number of times! It isn't that they aren't good enough it is that, like I said above, Benjamin is over the weight limit of the cargo and I would have to put Elizabeth forward facing. Elizabeth had been trying to sit in Benjamin's seat more and more I really don't want her forward facing, I don't need her fighting me!

    Emily tech and mom to Jacob 16, Daniel 13, Benjamin 9, Elizabeth 6. Child care provider to 4 other kiddos.

Similar Threads

  1. New pictures of Elizabeth and Benjamin.....
    By emandbri in forum Carseat Chat
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: 08-20-2008, 04:42 PM
  2. Question Torn Radian Foam Pad
    By abemom2 in forum Canadian Transportation Safety Issues
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 07-10-2008, 03:48 PM
  3. So torn about whether or not to keep dd RF
    By Holly in forum Carseat Chat
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: 08-10-2007, 08:32 PM
  4. im torn between the 3...
    By Michelle in forum CAR SEATS - General Child Safety Seat Questions, Help and Advice
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 08-02-2007, 05:11 PM

Bookmarks

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •