baby Gear Justification

Did any of you have someone who tried constantly to put you down the for the items you bought/registered for?

I havent started registering yet (little early ) but i have began shopping and when certain people find out what i've looked at or thinking of spending they all have opinions on the products or the amount it costs.

My fiance and i are planning on buy a house and renting one of the bedrooms to his best friend. If i had a choice we wouldnt be doing it but we need the money and he and DF had been planning on moving in together and then chanced his mind so we (read: he) offered him this deal and i didnt get much of a say. Thats all well and good, except his friend seems to think he knows everything about baby equipment b/c his little sister babysat a baby and she had some stuff (read: crap). he sees me as a spoiled little rich girl (my parents didnt have any money when i was growing up b/c they started a business now that the biz is doing well they like to buy me expensive gifts occasionally and didnt let me get a job till after i finished high school.) so when i mention i found this or that that i liked or want in his presence he comments about how i'm wasting DF's money or how i dont know what a dolalr is worth.

I was given alot of old used baby stuff from his family but its rather old (6 years at least) or really gross (filthy never washed and old bought used stuff). Its a nice gesture but i dont really see alot of it as usable so i've been shopping for new and people keep commenting how they gave me this or that so i wont really need a new one but in my eyes i do. I've found alot of it has safety issues (sharp spots, rust, broken plastic) and the dirty stuff is just too gross for me.

Not to mention i'm having TWINS that's 2 babies one highchair is not going to be enough, i need to of almost everything so i still have to buy things. I like my stuff to match, at least if i have 2 of something i like them to be similar. I'm not crazy enough to buy the whole graco line just to match everything but i do like my swings to be alike and my high chairs to match.

Did anyone else have to tell someone that they are adults and can decide how to spend your own money? I'm a big girl i know my finances and i can decide if i can afford 2 cradle swings or if i need to hit every garage sale in town to find 2 mismatched old crank style swings! The new stuff has features the old stuff doesnt have isnt it my choice if i use it or not?

On a side note: Anything they gave me i'm not planning on using i'm thinking of giving to his cousin who's pregnant (though i'd like to have her come move in with us but i dont know if thats do-able) I cant decide if its wrong to give her things that i dont think are safe enough to use for my child for her to use on her's. I was young and pregnant and i know i didnt read about the baby stuff half as much then as i did now. I'm worried she wont know that something is wrong with it until too late so maybe i should just trash the stuff that a possible risk?

Anyway thats the end of my rant. I hope no one actually read it all!

I can totally relate UGH, some people were soooo annoying when I was pregnant! (& my cousin's DH rents out their basement to his loser friend so I've heard a lot about that, too, LOL)

Try not to care what they think, even when you're rude - go ahead & put 'em in their place - use the excuse that the hormones are raging

About your cousin: if the item isn't recalled or expired I say go ahead & give it to her if you don't want it ... maybe clean it off 1st but ya know *WINK* Better, I think, that she & baby have less than wonderful supplies they can interact with together than she feel worried or whatever about not being to provide any such things for her baby, ya know?

ugh - I got that when I got pregnant with DD. Of course I pretty much shut them up with "this is my last baby and for ONCE I want to actually PICK OUT her stuff!"

I'm not PG yet, but I'm sure I'll go through all that as well. Most people here use the SnugRide and then a 3 in 1(YUCK). Right now my favs are the Key Fit and a big britax, probably a BLVD. Yes it's almost $300, but isn't my child worth so much more than that? DH's main experience with little ones is his brothers boys....and the almost 6 year old is in a backless booster and the less than 3 yr old is in a HB BPB. But my DH has said I have full control of the car seat issue...whatever I think is best. Hard to say how long I'll keep mine in a harnessed seat.

Susan

Susan, your dh is a smart man.
Mine finally decided that with my track record, if it's safer he thinks it's a great idea. LOL Except for some reason he thinks keeping our 9 yo in the back seat is going a bit far.

I feel really fortunate that my guy is a Dr. & interned at a NYC ER - he's seen victims of accidents & is all for my carseat gungho attitude It still takes a while to teach him how to use the seats properly, though

From nanny point of view

I just thought that I would say that since I nanny and babysit for several different families I know how irritating it can be to use very old babygear or not so nice stuff. If I didn't have anything to compare to then it wouldn't be a big deal, but I do! I feel that registering is a time to put what ever you want on there. Even some stuff that you or others may think is too expensive becuase you never know how generous people are going to be. It is a great oppourtunity to end up with some nice stuff that you maybe you couldn't afford.

I currently watch for 2 families that are expecting a second or third and I am disgusted that people judge them on what they get for their children. I can't believe the family disagreements that occur over baby gear and using the gear correctly.....like carseats!

My finace has pretty much told me car seats are my domain. He doesnt know too much about them and he knows that once i pick out a seat i wont buy anything else. I'm hoping that i can get a marathon or one of its siblings (i like the DC for the twins and a marathon for SIL but for her i'm just letting her pick any pattern she likes out of the 4 britax seats)

He knew when we decided to try for a baby and adopt SIL we were going to be dipping into our savings and when we found out it was twins he didnt even bother to bring up how much more it was going to cost. Its his family and a few of our friends who think we're spending too much or spoiling our kids (yes, spoiled fetui) Since when was buying one of the safest seat on the market spoiling? I better buy a 3 in 1 i dont want spoiled kids like SIL (she's spoiled rotten its true, i'd never seen a kid like this before i met her!)

I will admit to splurging some. I was given a jenny Lind crib in a color i dont like and it seems so rickety and wobble, i took it apart and put it in storage, i'm buying 2 new cribs that are fairly expensive. I want to use them for all of my kids and they can change into toddler beds and headboards for full size beds so its not like i'm wasting money. I plan on buying all my baby stuff once and using it thru all the kids that i can. i dont think all their handmedowns will last thru 4 more kids

FWIW, you sound very wise to me Parenting is (if only in part!) about thinking "outside the box" & planning ahead for what the future might hold You're dong great, Mama