?to turn 18 month old toddler FF for long trip?

es1967 · Apr 17, 2008

Next month we might be driving from Florida to NC which is a 12 hour drive for vacation. DS still hates being in the carseat for any extended period of time. It seems its even getting worse now that he is older!

Well, my husband wants to fly because our last years trip was stressful w a crying toddler. I was thinking that maybe we should try to turn him FF and position his seat in the back center(safer?) of my Volvo S40 to see if he might like being in the car better. I'm not sure if it will make a difference but if it does I could convince my DH to drive up. We usually break up the trip driving 6 hours each day with lots of stops. I know its safer to keep a child RF as long as possible. What would you do? Flying will cost alot more and we would have to rent a car as well but we would save 2 days driving.

ginny4 · Apr 17, 2008

i'd keep him RF! it's so much safer.

so instead i'd invest in a DVD player that will super duper secure in the car for your DS to watch. take turns spending time in the back seat with him, have lots of books, soft toys, coloring books (if he won't eat the crayons), snacks,.....

we took a 10hr drive from NJ to NC & back (tho it took longer because when travelin with kids you gotta stop more often). there was 8 of us 4ADULTS & 4KIDS (1RF, 1FF, & 2 boosters) we didn't have a DVD player but everything else worked beautifully. there wasn't any MAJOR problems that i couldn't handle. the most major was DS got sick & he dumped a bottle of water in his lap. so at a hotel/restraurant "johnny appleseed" i uninstalled & dried cover while we ate dinner & reinstalled. it was a pain but necessary.

abacus2 · Apr 17, 2008

If flying won't bankrupt you, fly! Hours in the car with an unhappy toddler is miserable. I doubt RFing vs. FFing would make a big difference to his comfort, but it would make a big difference to his safety. Keep him RFing.

CTPDMom · Apr 17, 2008

My first choice would be flying. But if that wasn't a possibility I'd work on solutions like a DVD player before I'd turn an 18mo old ff'ing.

Do you sit with him in the back? Maybe just having someone back there with him would help?

es1967 · Apr 17, 2008

CTPDMom said:
My first choice would be flying. But if that wasn't a possibility I'd work on solutions like a DVD player before I'd turn an 18mo old ff'ing.

Do you sit with him in the back? Maybe just having someone back there with him would help?

Yes, I sit in the back with him but it doesn't help.

steph · Apr 17, 2008

If you sit in the back with him and it doesn't seem to help then I doubt turning him FF would matter (since he can see you when you sit in the back seat with him and cries anyway). I would keep him RF or fly if I could.

CDNTech · Apr 17, 2008

How reclined do you have his seat?

At 18 months a toddler can have his seat as upright as 30 degrees (instead of the 45 degrees needed for newborns). Maybe this is a case of needing to be more upright and not laying down so much?

If I could afford to fly, I would choose that over driving just because I find it easier on anything longer than a 6 hr drive.

Otherwise (as previously suggested), soft toys, books and a secure DVD player help out a lot in our vehicle.

solmama · Apr 17, 2008

We take an 11 hour trip, each way, twice a year. It's been toughest when my kiddos were between 6-18 mos. It seems to get better after that. I'm hoping that, when we take our long trip this summer, my son will be more happy. It's just so hard to listen to kids cry. He remains rear-facing though.

I don't know if this will work for your kiddo, but we do the drive in one day. We leave in the early AM (like 4am, ugh) and drive all day to arrive at our destination before supper. The kids then have time to play and eat before bed. We thought about stretching the drive to 2 days, but decided it would just be 2 days of torture.

We pack the car/van the night before and are basically all ready to go, except for caffeinated beverages and kids, when we wake up. This seems to work much better for us than leaving in the late morning (9 or 10am) and arriving after bedtime.

laurenrachey · Apr 17, 2008

is driving at night a possibility? You and DH could take turns. A sleeping baby is a quiet baby

I would keep him RF though

jclaire · Apr 17, 2008

I was going to suggest night time driving as well. When we take long trips like that we leave at bedtime and drive through the night. It's much easier on us and the kids and traffic is non existant!

brightredmtn · Apr 17, 2008

If you can afford it I would fly. We haven't taken a long car trip because I just can't imagine that it is at all comfortable to be harnessed in a seat like that for so long. I know I need to adjust every so often so my butt doesn't fall asleep and you just can't do that in a car seat. Just my :twocents:

momof2kiddos · Apr 18, 2008

We are actually driving over 16 hrs with our two toddlers this summer(they will be 3 and 18 months at time of travel),my dd will stay RF,when I travled with my ds when he was right around age 2,he perfered RF for longer trips as he could sleep better and was way more comfy.So I am leaving my dd be as it is so much safer but also it is so much more comfy for her.Plus at just 15 months right now and the trip only 3 months away she is still oh so small and too much of "a baby" for me to put FF just yet.Now if this was a trip and she was over two then I would turn her FF for the trip,if that is what she seemed to perfer,but at 18 months,nope,not for my kids

natysr · Apr 18, 2008

I will chime in with the others. I don't agree with turning children FF just for a long trip. To me, it doesn't make sense to have them restrained in a less safe way when you are adding additional risk factors (such as a fatigued driver). But, I think I may feel this way because I knew someone who fell asleep at the while while driving on a family vacation with his wife and 4 kids with him.

If you can afford to buy you child his own seat on the airplane, then I would fly. If not, I would buy a DVD player.

cryswilkins · Apr 18, 2008

I don't think that it will matter what direction that he is facing, he is going to fuss some of the time no matter what. That is why once you have a family its called a trip, not a vacation.

I would drive at night if at all possible. Sing songs, have snacks, fun toys he has never seen, etc. Also, I know that we have what we call the universal baby entertainer.... a half drank bottle of water. Hours of entertainment right there. I have been know to toss her random items out of my purse and diaper bag to keep Zoe entertained in the car. Better than screaming right?

jewlsvern · Apr 18, 2008

Next week we are driving across the US (CA to VA) with 4 kids and 5 adults. Two 13 mo olds, a 5 yr old and a 7 yr old. I am just praying my DD who is not too fond of her car seat does okay. The 7 yr old is next to her to entertain her also. We have invested in DVD players, soft books, travel games and lots of snacks. Our trip will take about 6 days so we are planning a lot of stops and driving during nap times. Flying would always be preferable, but who can afford 9 plane tickets. If you drive over 2 days I would suggest sstopping earlier in the evening and let him run round and play and get out as much energy as possible. We booked hotels with indoor pools so we could be sure the kids had a place to play.

southpawboston · Apr 18, 2008

i would suggest a few possibilities (some have already been mentioned):

flying (if it doesn't break your bank)
night driving (if kiddo has a track record of sleeping in the car at night)

and then i'm torn between using a DVD player (serious projectile hazard) and turning him FF. each has its own set of risks. however, i do feel that if you can't fly or drive at night, then you should choose between the DVD player and turning FF, *if* either of those helps calm the crying. a constantly crying toddler in the car is a safety hazard in itself because of the stress and distraction it causes on the driver, and may be more of a danger than using a DVD player or turning FF.

here's another option:

with our 3.5 yo and almost 2 yo, we've concluded that two hours of driving without stopping is the maximum they can endure comfortably. our strategy for long road trips is to stop every 2 hours for an *extended* rest-- i'm talking a one hour rest, at least, with food, bathroom, and EXERCISE-- running around, playing games, etc... then back in the car for another two hours. sure, it turns an 8 hour non-stop trip into an 11-12 hour trip, but it keeps the kids AND the parents so much more calm and sane (and healthy)! :twocents:

we've done this the last couple of trips we've made between boston and western NYS (normally 6 hours without stopping) and it has been very successful. we actually arrived after 9-10 hours quite refreshed and relaxed!!!

crunchierthanthou · Apr 18, 2008

We've done several 12+ hour trips as well and also found the two hour per segment cap. We tried the drive through the night thing, but it was miserable. We'd kill ourselves to get there and then ds would be up for the day when we were exhausted. We haven't done it since last summer (when ds still napped), but here's what we found to work best-

We'd leave around noon, drive for an hour and then have lunch. Then ds would nap (hopefully for a couple hours), then a couple more hours of driving followed by a long break for dinner. We'd drive for about another hour and he'd fall asleep for the night. We could push through the last 4 hours and get in around midnight, which is still a reasonable hour and gave us enough sleep for the night. We found that maximized ds's sleep time and eating breaks without running us into the ground.

es1967 · Apr 18, 2008

Thanks for all your suggestions. Last year we left just before bedtime and DS fell asleep for around 1 hour. He then cried for hours while we drove in the dark. DH and I agreed we would rather drive in the day w a crying toddler than at night. It was horrible. The two hour drive limit would work but not sure if DH will want to do this so flying is really the best option. Dh does get stressed listening to DS scream for hours. I agree turning him FF may not make a difference. I do have his seat reclined maybe too much. I'm not even sure how to adjust the recline on my marathon seat anymore. I'll have to pull out the manual. This may help a little. What should the recline be for a 18 month old? What worked on our last years trip was leaving close to nap time but now DS tends to wake up after an hour. At home its fine because he goes back to sleep but in the car he stays awake. Thanks again for all the tips!!

es1967 · Apr 18, 2008

crunchierthanthou said:
We've done several 12+ hour trips as well and also found the two hour per segment cap. We tried the drive through the night thing, but it was miserable. We'd kill ourselves to get there and then ds would be up for the day when we were exhausted. We haven't done it since last summer (when ds still napped), but here's what we found to work best-

We'd leave around noon, drive for an hour and then have lunch. Then ds would nap (hopefully for a couple hours), then a couple more hours of driving followed by a long break for dinner. We'd drive for about another hour and he'd fall asleep for the night. We could push through the last 4 hours and get in around midnight, which is still a reasonable hour and gave us enough sleep for the night. We found that maximized ds's sleep time and eating breaks without running us into the ground.

This sounds like it might be possible to work if he would nap long enough.

crunchierthanthou · Apr 18, 2008

A rf convertible should be reclined between 30 and 45 degrees. A newborn needs a recline of 45 degrees, but toddlers and older babies with good head control can be as upright as 30 degrees, as long as their heads don't slump when they sleep. The MA base has to be in the mechanical recline position, but there are a couple tips to get it more upright. Start by pulling the base back from the seat bight an inch or two (seat bight = the crease where the vehicle seatback and bottom meet). Then push down toward the front of the seat as you tighten the belt(s)- put your pressure over where his feet go as opposed to toward the back where his bottom goes. Just be sure it's still reclined at least 30 degrees because you can get it very upright by doing those two things. We used to recommend then adjusting the recline with the rf tether, but overtightening has been linked to broken recline mechanisms and energy absorbing tethers.

?to turn 18 month old toddler FF for long trip?

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