So ... how many???

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Tara

New member
*raising hand*

I'm *ready* to go any time now. Baby is "due" about mid- January...#5 btw
 

Dreaming_of_Speed

Senior Community Member
I'm trying to be!

And my finace and i are about to adopt his little sister does that count? (yes we're nuts adopting a 4 year old and having a baby in the same year. please pray for my sanity!)
 

Victorious4

Senior Community Member
Neat! Hope all goes well for you, Dreaming :)

& Tara, hear's to getting through the holiday season comfortably & maybe even pamered ;)
 

joolsplus3

Admin - CPS Technician
Me me me... little girl due early Feb :). So far she has 3 car seats, lol... I can't wait for xmas to be over so I can start buying other stuff for her (she's up to a couple sleep n plays and some diapers now, at least, if she decides to come out WAY early, but I doubt she will...)

:)
 

Dreaming_of_Speed

Senior Community Member
*tenderly raises hand in air*

Thats right i'm pregnant! I got a positive the day after i wrote that above post! I think i'm 4 weeks along. Gotta love those pregnancy tests that can tell before you miss your period, i've taken one a day for a week just b/c i had a feeling.

So now the question is: how can i hold off Christmas until we're ready to tell everyone? And how do i break the new on Christmas? (yes i'm going to tell the family early i know its a bad idea but its exciting and it is christmas![U
 

KeikiHula

New member
YAY!!!!! I'm so happy for you!!!!!!!!!!! I have been so sad for you since your accident.:( Having your niece and a new baby will be hard I'm sure, but lots of us have more than one kid and make it. Morgan was 3 yrs 4 days old when Cody was born, and Cody will be about 2.5 when this baby is born. YIKES! Kids are fun though.:D
Don't have any advice on telling everyone at Christmas. I still haven't told anyone, not even dh. I think that's why I posted about it here. I had to tell *someone*! I got through the whole weekend with family in WA and didn't breath a word. My MIL thought it was pretty strange that I didn't feel good even though I wasn't "sick", but I doubt anyone would even guess that I was pregnant b/c dh got snipped last year. :rolleyes:
 

Longhorn Lady

New member
Yay Dreaming!

Congrats, what a WONDERFUL early Christmas present!

One of my favorite ways that I've heard of for sharing "baby news" is wrapping up two 12-inch rulers and having the card say "our family is growing by two feet" :)

Good luck! I wish you a wonderful next 9 months!
 

Dreaming_of_Speed

Senior Community Member
I'm going to go ahead and tell them during our 6 x-mas parties we are expected to attend. My plan is to wait until we go to my FIL's family's party b/c they play the white elephant game. We've bought a high chair and we're going to get an infant seat and wrap them up and put them in the pile. When its our turn to steal things i'll get the car seat and on his turn he'll go for the high chair and then we'll set them up and play with them and be all excited and see if they catch on. They didnt know we were trying (actually they thought we had stopped having sex until after the wedding. ;) ) After that we'll just announce it (and my hubby found me a shirt online that says "knocked up" that should be arriving in 2 days i want to wear but its a tank top and maternity so we'll see)

I'm not so worried about handling my SIL and a new baby. But i'm worried how she'll handle it. She's leaving her mommy and daddy which is already a big change (the reason she's being removed from the home is not something she understands) and she can be somewhat violent (not malicious) she plays rough and doesnt always think before she acts. She's never been around babies before (her aunt had one but she didnt play with it b/c the baby was born early during cold and flu season 2 years ago that was really bad) Worst comes to worst i'll just never leave her in a situation where she could get to the baby when i'm not around.

Keiki, why havent you told your hubby? Or are you waiting for a Christmas surprise? My neighbor got pregnant after her husband 'got' snipped. He chickened out but never told his wife! I hope your hubby has better brains.
 

Victorious4

Senior Community Member
CONGRATS, Dreaming:D Good plan about the Xmas parties ... have you looked into some kind of Play Therapy for your little SIL? My DD just had an eval. because her speech & behaviors have been regressing during all this Family Court nonsense - she'll be getting Play Therapy free through the school district. BELLY RUBS & BLESSINGS:)
 

KeikiHula

New member
I agree with Papooses on the play therapy. And since you are adopting, I'm sure there are even more things available to you to make the transition smoother. Morgan was always pretty gentle with Cody, but I was worried b/c the only other baby he had been around was my friend's little girl. He was always really lovey to her, but didn't know when to stop hugging and kissing. lol I was really careful about leaving him alone with Cody, and then I would do something on the other side of the room (where I could still see them, but not be involved) and then just out of the room (could still see them) and then in the next room (couldn't see them, but could hear them) ect, until I felt comfortable that they would be fine. Before I knew it Cody was old enough to be crawling around and pretty soon after that, if Morgan was bugging him, he would haul off and pop him and then yell at him. LOL
If it ends up that you can't leave your SIL alone with the baby, but you need to be able to get things done, you can sling the baby. I had an AWESOME fleece pouch for Cody and it made life so much easier.
I haven't told dh b/c I still feel like this baby isn't going to stick around, and he doesn't handle my M/C's very well. I told him about 2 of them as they were happening, and he just freaked out b/c there was really nothing he could do. The others, I didn't say anything about until well after, and he was sad, but it just worked out better. My friend told me that is such an unhealthy (mentally) thing to do, but it has worked for us. I've had enough m/c's I know what to expect and what to look for, so I generally don't even go to the dr. I'll tell him in another couple weeks. By 10-12 w I need to find a high risk OB.
I was with him when he got snipped, so I know he did it. lol I got to watch the whole thing. It was pretty cool. But he never went back to get tested to make sure it worked. We have joked about that, but never really thought it wouldn't have worked!
 

Dreaming_of_Speed

Senior Community Member
I may try some sort of play group. She does the dance class several times a week (and i've decided to drive her the hour and half each way so she can continue with the same kids and teacher) and really likes it. My fiance and i have managed to get our work and school schedules moved around enough we wont need to put her in day care (the only day care she's been to is at the gym when her mom worked out for a hour and she hated it and would just go nuts)

I would love to sling the baby all the time but i have sever scoliosis (curvature of the spine) and am not supposed to lift things over 30 pounds or carry objects over 20 pounds continuously for more than an hour. I will of course bend these rules and put my kids before my doctors rules if they need me but i end up having a spinal ligation before the end of they year even if i didnt have 3 kids to run around after all day long i dont know what will happen with the constant bending and twisting involved in motherhood.

My fiance did not take the miscarriage i had in the begin of our relationship well either. I told him after the fact as i was not sure if i was pregnant and hadnt had a chance to test yet (16 yr old living with my parents) He took the last miscarriage very well under the circumstances. He was more worried about me and my health and his nephew than about the baby we didnt know. He knows that when i get pregnant i am very likely to lose the baby b/c i have a scar across my uterus from being attacked several years ago. I've had 5 or 6 m/c's in 5 years, 2 of which happened from trauma. which is why i didnt know if telling the family early was a bad idea but i have a feeling i'm going to carry this one full term (and maybe knowing i'm pregnant will make the family hate me less for adopting SIL and taking her from her parents.)
 

Victorious4

Senior Community Member
I also think that heaven forbid you don't carry full term, telling your family as you plan might be really good in terms of added support? :eek: Unless of course you don't want your family in your business like that :p (((((BABY STICK AROUND VIBES)))))

& about Play Therapy - it's very different than a play group ... it's a way of helping children develop & use their inner resources to cope with stress in a more healthy, positive way (especially useful for adopted & foster kids). The book below (the picture is a link to buy it at Amazon) has been helpful for me so far, but since I'm also trying to deal with my own PTSD (for which I'm in therapy) I'm having a bit of trouble utilizing the concepts/ideas in a way that is most beneficial for my daughter - this is why I'm reaching out for help from a professional now ... heck, if it's free for your SIL it might be really nice for you to have someone else working through the Play Therapy with her since you'll have a newborn *WINK WINK*
 

Dreaming_of_Speed

Senior Community Member
unfortuantly they arent that sort of family. they seemed to think it was for the best i lost the last baby b/c "no one wants to be a bastard" just b/c we havent tied the knot yet and the baby wouldnt like having parnets that werent married!

I will defiantly look into play thearpy. I also go to therapy and was thinking of taking her into see a child psy. maybethis is a better idea. I'll call my psy. and see what she recomends in our area.
 

Victorious4

Senior Community Member
Ah, I see ... well, I hope for you that it goes over smoothly & all turns out good! :)

My daughter's Play Therapy is free through the school district (after requesting an evaluation), but it's also offered through the Family & Children's Services program (I think with financial assistance if qualified) -- not sure if it's similar to your area, but I hope it gives you an idea of where to start ;)
 

Dreaming_of_Speed

Senior Community Member
My doctor is going to get her in an eval with a doctor he knows. Apparently theres generally a waiting list but he's getting me around all that. Thanks for the tip. We told her about the baby last night (small family celebration, his older sister announced they had decided to try for a baby after new years so we decided to tell them we'd beaten them to the point. :) She wasnt too happy. She thinks we did this intentionally to hurt her. Last time i discussed it with her she knew we were trying and she was saying she needed 5 more years! Crazy) Anyway little SIL was excited. She kept telling em the baby could have all of her baby stuff (graco doll stuff) and that she wanted to name it Harold :) *praying for a girl* We'll see how she feels about ti when everyone wants to see it and it cries all night. Until then, Thank god she's happy!
 

Victorious4

Senior Community Member
Cute!

*Pbltpblt* I'm sticking my tongue out at the other SIL :p

Harold might not be too awful for a middle name :rolleyes: ;)
 

Dreaming_of_Speed

Senior Community Member
His sister is the biggest B**** i've ever met! I didnt even meet her until after we'd been dating for more than a year b/c she had legal disowned her father b/c he didnt buy her a car! She got married while she was not speaking to her family and refused to even discuss her father attending unless he paid for the car she wanted (which is actually the kind of car i crashed last month!!!!! :) ) and for half of her wedding. she's evil and manipulative. She actually choose to sign that she didnt want to even provide foster care for YSIL b/c she wasnt ready to be a mom but then 3 weeks later just announced she's going off the pill and will begin TTC in jan! She hates me b/c her step sister and my fiance's other sister (he has 3) is my maid of honor and her husband is the best man and DN is/was going to be the ring bearer (depends on if he can walk by then) and i didnt ask her to be anything. Well yeah why would i? So she could turn the wedding into her affair? No thanks i have YSIL to be the 'wedding princess' (her mother created this and i dont care for it)

No, as it is my fiance is Don the Third. (we dont use the name Don for him. Even his mother hated it but didnt have the guts to end the tradition. i do.) We've already decided against making anything the fourth.
 

KeikiHula

New member
I started spotting yesterday and lost the baby this afternoon. I expected it all along, so I guess I'm ok. Just wanted to give an update.:(
 

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