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  1. #1
    CPS Technician fyrfightermomma's Avatar
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    Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    Ok so my 2.5 year old went to her grandparents for the weekend. We ended up being able to fit both seats in MIL's car Rfing (I wasnt sure we woudl be able to). She has never had an issue getting in the car before. She LOVES her "moo moo seat" as she calls it. But when I went to put her into her nana's car on Friday she compeltely flipped out. I've never seen her so terrified in my life. She was frantically trying to get down and saying "Scared, Scared, get down get down now please". I could barely buckle her in. I asked her if she wanted her blankey (which she has never refused) and she threw it on the ground and kept screaming "Scrared, down please". She cried so hard she threw up!!!! I figured it was because it was a new car she'd never been in. So my MIL went on her merry way for her 1 hour drive home with my screaming toddler. She finally fell asleep according to MIL after 40 minutes of screaming.

    So DH goes to pick the kids up from there last night(MIL did not take them anywhere over the weekend). Puts the seats in his car and tries to put her in and she freaks again. He has no clue what to do since she is so terrified so he converted the seat to FFing (*sniff* I cant believe hes so advanced already to know how to do that!!) and tried that and she was fine....I have no clue why....
    SO this morning I want to run errands and we got to my car (where her seat is still RFing) and she flips out again. She was so hysterical we couldn't even leave! She vomited again from crying so hard.

    So my question is, whats the deal?!?!!?!? She has NEVER cried getting in the car. Could that one time in another car have traumatized her that much??? Has anyone elses kids done this and how long till it passes???? I really need to run errands today but I can't if she is going to scream and cry so hard she vomits. I mean, she is truly terrified..you can tell by her eyes. Should I just stick to the RFing or turn her FFing since she was fine last night and then after a couple days has passed and I "hope" shes forgotten turn her RFing again???

    E 8y 43 lbs 58" Harmony NBB
    S 7y 52 lbs 54" Harmony NBB
    J-4y 38 lbs Graco Headwise 70 Britax Roundabout 50

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  3. #2
    CPS Technician
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    In a situation like this at that age, I'd turn her ffing, at least for a week and see what happens. Then you could maybe let her help you put her seat back in rfing to see what her reactions are before you actually go ahead and put her back in rfing.
    Jennifer, Special Needs CPST, peds nurse, and CSFTL Admin mom to:
    AJ-13 (five steps), Evan-11 (nbb),
    Ilana-9 (nbb) ,
    Olivia-7 (hbb), and
    Unity-3 (rf and ff)

  4. #3
    CPS Technician bbartlettnfld's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    My daughter got scared RF once when the RF tether wasn't pulled as snug as it should be so we stopped suddenly and her seat "bounced" a bit. The seat rode down and came back up.. She didn't like it at all but was fine once the tether was tightened..
    Maybe something was different with the install and she didn't feel secure.

    BethAnn

    Canadian CPST, Mommy to ,
    E 12 5 Steps!
    N 7 Monteray, Prkway & Clek

  5. #4
    CPS Technician An Aurora's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    At that age, I wouldn't press the issue. Who knows why she is scared, but if she is so terrified that she screams and throws up, I would leave her FF.
    Anna~ RN and expired CPST (hoping to recert soon!)

  6. #5
    Moderator - CPS Technician safeinthecar's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    Can she tell you why she is scared?

    Did someone say something negative about her being rfing that she overheard?

    Maybe someone commented on the famous "Her legs are going to break" nonsense when you didn't realize she was listening>
    Kimberly
    Proud mommy of Becky 18! Danny 15 Hope 12~Auntie to William-14, David-10, and Logan 2~

  7. #6
    Moderator - CPST Instructor snowbird25ca's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    At her age I would really not deal with the battle and would put her ff'ing for now and then talk to her about rf'ing again a little ways down the road if you want to give it another try. At 2.5yrs old she's safe ff'ing... I know it's not what you're hoping for at the moment, but I honestly think that at her age it is not a fight to be waging with her - especially when she is obviously terrified for whatever reason. Hopefully as she gets more verbal she'll be able to tell you what happened, but for right now I don't think it's worth pushing the issue.

    ((hugs))
    Trudy - Canadian CPSAC certified CRST Instructor-Trainer and mommy to:
    Janeen - 17 yrs and learning to drive!
    Jillian - 11 yrs, 80'ish lbs, 5-stepping in each car. :O
    Jonas - 8yrs, 65lbs, Riding in an Oobr in each car.
    Both safely riding in either a 2007 Outlook or a 2015 Subaru Legacy depending on the day.


  8. #7
    CPS Technician fyrfightermomma's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by safeinthecar View Post
    Can she tell you why she is scared?

    Did someone say something negative about her being rfing that she overheard?

    Maybe someone commented on the famous "Her legs are going to break" nonsense when you didn't realize she was listening>

    Nope. It was just her and me outside. She had been in my car 1/2 hr prior and was fine. I took her outside to play while I installed the seat. Once it was installed I put her in it and our ordeal started. So no one ever said anything since it was just her and me and she was fine 1/2 hr prior. This is very strange to me.......

    E 8y 43 lbs 58" Harmony NBB
    S 7y 52 lbs 54" Harmony NBB
    J-4y 38 lbs Graco Headwise 70 Britax Roundabout 50

  9. #8
    CPS Technician fyrfightermomma's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    I talked to my husband and he suggested buying a more uncomfortable forward facing seat with not a whole lot of padding that is very upright hoping she would find it uncomfortable and wouldn't be able to sleep since its so upright. Then he said we could make a big deal about how the baby is backwards and so comfy and if she complains about not being comfy we can tell her that her moo moo seat is in the garage and if she wants to try the comfy seat again we can try.

    What do you think about that??? I think it would work because she hates being upright in the car, but I have reservations about using a cheap not padded seat for the time being, especially if its going to be forward facing. What do you guys think???

    When we ran errands today I put her in the EFTA FFing and all she could talk about was her "moo moo" seat so I know she misses it but I just told her that that seat is only for facing backwards right now and when she wants to face backwards again then she can have her moo moo seat. She then proceded to tell me "thats ok mommy, the birdy needs my moo moo seat" No idea where the birdy came from! LOL

    E 8y 43 lbs 58" Harmony NBB
    S 7y 52 lbs 54" Harmony NBB
    J-4y 38 lbs Graco Headwise 70 Britax Roundabout 50

  10. #9
    Moderator - CPST Instructor snowbird25ca's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by Eviesmama View Post
    I talked to my husband and he suggested buying a more uncomfortable forward facing seat with not a whole lot of padding that is very upright hoping she would find it uncomfortable and wouldn't be able to sleep since its so upright. Then he said we could make a big deal about how the baby is backwards and so comfy and if she complains about not being comfy we can tell her that her moo moo seat is in the garage and if she wants to try the comfy seat again we can try.


    What do you think about that??? I think it would work because she hates being upright in the car, but I have reservations about using a cheap not padded seat for the time being, especially if its going to be forward facing. What do you guys think???
    This actually sounds like a really good idea to me. My first thought is Apex if you have tall enough seatbacks - it has EPP foam in the headrest, but if you remove the infant padding it isn't going to compare to a Britax in terms of comfort. It's also very upright.

    Of convertible seats, the barest bones one I can think of is the scenera - of course it's also the only one that doesn't have EPS/EPP foam at present. You could always buy an evenflo chase. The bare bones model doesn't have any extra cushioning, but it has EPS foam in the head area now if you get a new date of manufacture. Of course it's a ff'ing only seat, but it will meet the upright less comfortable req's, and has foam in the head area. Probably cheaper than the apex and less comfy.. although the apex does have longer use potential for the future.

    eta: I just have to tell you how awesome it is that your dh is brainstorming for ways to get her to be happy rf'ing. So many parents seem to disagree on it or else one parent just follows the other one's lead. It's great to see both parents so committed to keeping her rf'ing if possible.
    Trudy - Canadian CPSAC certified CRST Instructor-Trainer and mommy to:
    Janeen - 17 yrs and learning to drive!
    Jillian - 11 yrs, 80'ish lbs, 5-stepping in each car. :O
    Jonas - 8yrs, 65lbs, Riding in an Oobr in each car.
    Both safely riding in either a 2007 Outlook or a 2015 Subaru Legacy depending on the day.


  11. #10
    CPS Technician fyrfightermomma's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    Whats the weight limit minimum for those forward facing seats you mentioned. Are they all 20 pounds?? Right now since shes been sick she fluctuates between 21-22 pounds and I know a few seats its 22 pounds or up. If she is under 22 pounds is that a huge no-no???

    E 8y 43 lbs 58" Harmony NBB
    S 7y 52 lbs 54" Harmony NBB
    J-4y 38 lbs Graco Headwise 70 Britax Roundabout 50

  12. #11
    Moderator - CPST Instructor snowbird25ca's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by Eviesmama View Post
    Whats the weight limit minimum for those forward facing seats you mentioned. Are they all 20 pounds?? Right now since shes been sick she fluctuates between 21-22 pounds and I know a few seats its 22 pounds or up. If she is under 22 pounds is that a huge no-no???
    Any cosco/safety 1st seat min weight is 22lbs, and if she's under then yep, it's a huge no-no. She's tiny for her age, hey?

    Evenflo seats have a 20lb min weight for ff'ing, so that leaves you pretty much with the chase being your only option. Pull back the cover at the top to make sure you're getting one with foam if this is the way you decide to go. It's only been added in the last 6mos from what I know. (The new models at TRU all came in with it, the old seat patterns didn't have it.)
    Trudy - Canadian CPSAC certified CRST Instructor-Trainer and mommy to:
    Janeen - 17 yrs and learning to drive!
    Jillian - 11 yrs, 80'ish lbs, 5-stepping in each car. :O
    Jonas - 8yrs, 65lbs, Riding in an Oobr in each car.
    Both safely riding in either a 2007 Outlook or a 2015 Subaru Legacy depending on the day.


  13. #12
    CPS Technician fyrfightermomma's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    Thanks so much! Yep, shes my little peanut. She has been tiny since the day she was born! Her baby sister is gonna tackle her one of these days

    E 8y 43 lbs 58" Harmony NBB
    S 7y 52 lbs 54" Harmony NBB
    J-4y 38 lbs Graco Headwise 70 Britax Roundabout 50

  14. #13
    CPS Technician fyrfightermomma's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing UPDATE!

    Woo hoo!! She is back RFing. Our little plan worked. We went out to get the cheapest most uncomfortable Chase we could get. We plopped her in that and took a LONGGGG drive during her normal nap time. We made a huge deal about the baby being all comfy in her seat and being able to go night night. We told the 2 year old to go night night too. She was so tired and fussed the entire time. We kept telling her to go to sleep (but knew she wouldnt be able to). Her head just kept falling forward and she couldn't fall asleep. After a while she said her butt hurt lol We explained several times that she has to sit in that seat because it goes forward and she wants to go forward. Her moo moo seat doesnt go forward right now but if she wants to go night night in the car we can put the moo moo seat back in.

    She cried the entire way in the car. When we got home we opened the garage door and she saw her seat. We asked her if she'd like her moo moo seat back and she said yes and we had her "help" us put it back in (thanks to the poster that suggested that!)

    We rode around last night and she was fine. I am very happy!!!
    Last edited by fyrfightermomma; 04-09-2008 at 11:32 AM.

    E 8y 43 lbs 58" Harmony NBB
    S 7y 52 lbs 54" Harmony NBB
    J-4y 38 lbs Graco Headwise 70 Britax Roundabout 50

  15. #14
    CPS Technician Auntie2Avi's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    That is great!! You/your DH are so smart to think about getting a unpadded seat for FF!!

  16. #15
    CPS Technician cryswilkins's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    Wow, I am glad that worked out for you. How strange though.....

    Crystal, CPST Mama to Zoe 11/30/2006 , Ollie 1/3/2010 , Eli 9/24/2012 and Baby Isabel 7/23/2015

  17. #16
    CPS Technician An Aurora's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by cryswilkins View Post
    Wow, I am glad that worked out for you. How strange though.....
    I agree.
    Anna~ RN and expired CPST (hoping to recert soon!)

  18. #17
    CPS Technician fyrfightermomma's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    Who knows why kids get scared of the things they do! I'll never forget 6 months ago when she started getting scared of the refrigerator doors opening....lol

    E 8y 43 lbs 58" Harmony NBB
    S 7y 52 lbs 54" Harmony NBB
    J-4y 38 lbs Graco Headwise 70 Britax Roundabout 50

  19. #18
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by Eviesmama View Post
    Who knows why kids get scared of the things they do! I'll never forget 6 months ago when she started getting scared of the refrigerator doors opening....lol
    She sounds like AJ. He chooses the strangest things to get 'scared' of. I'm glad she's back rfing.
    Jennifer, Special Needs CPST, peds nurse, and CSFTL Admin mom to:
    AJ-13 (five steps), Evan-11 (nbb),
    Ilana-9 (nbb) ,
    Olivia-7 (hbb), and
    Unity-3 (rf and ff)

  20. #19
    Forum Ambassador TechnoGranola's Avatar
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    Re: Child suddenly terrified of RFing?!?!?!

    I am glad to hear the happy update!

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