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  1. #1
    CPS Technician Misty-Bug's Avatar
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    GRRR!! This makes me so mad!!

    sorry gonna vent to you guys cause you will understand why I am so mad!
    My neighbour, who's son is my daycare child, has turned him FFing!!! He is one week older then Cooper. So 20 months. He is only about 23ish lbs maybe 24. But his muscles are so weak, in my eyes, cause it is like changing a newborn. Well, almost. He just lays there. He is so thin and so frail. But they know the facts and the reasons to keep him RFing.
    The excuse......the stupidest thing I have heard.... "He does so much better FFing"
    He is a child! He doesn't know what is better or not.
    Oh but he can see out the window and see what is going on BLAH BLAH BLAH.....grrrrrrr.........
    So I said, well can I at least install it correctly for you? They said yes. They had it installed SO WRONG. First of all no top tether, which in Canada is law from what I understand, PLUS they used the locking clip AND locked the seat belt. So I took it all apart and installed it correctly. It moved like three inches before I started and NOT AT ALL once I was done. At least I know the seat is in right!!!
    Then I came back upstairs and I told them that it was installed. But then I got to the point. I said, "even though you have him FFing in your car I will NOT, under ANY circumstance, put him FFing before the weight or height limits." I made it a very obvious point! Then the dad said, it was fine. "You do what you want in your car and we will do what we want in ours" is what he said.
    I am just so mad. There is just no getting through to some people. Sigh.....at least they kept him RFing for 20months. I may get another Radian just to keep him RFing longer in my car, once he outgrows the AO though.
    ok.....I am done. Sorry it was so long and thanks for reading. Few! I feel a bit better now getting it out!!!
    Misty
    SAHM to Cooper, 04/16/06 and Aurora, 06/25/11


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  3. #2
    CPST Instructor azgirl71's Avatar
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    Re: GRRR!! This makes me so mad!!

    I am sorry . I know first hand too how frustrating it can be to tell people you know and get them to understand the importance of RFing. You are correct top tether is required by law in Canada. At least this is what I have learned. You did your part. If thye choose not to do thiers it is thier choice.
    Lisa - CPSTI
    Mom to Tucker, 5 years old, 29.2 lbs, 39.25 inches tall who has a variety of different carseats to ride in.
    My new grandson is my signature photo

  4. #3
    Moderator MomToEliEm's Avatar
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    Re: GRRR!! This makes me so mad!!

    As long as you have informed the parents of all the rearfacing benefits and the child has reached the minimum forward facing limiits of the seat, there is much you can do with how they install the seat in their car. I think they are making a parental decision that is considered safe by the manufacturer. It may not be the safest thing, but it is allowed.

    Hopefully you can keep that child as safe as possible in your car by keeping him rearfacing for as long as possible. I think in this situation, that is the most you can do.

    Good job on at least getting their foward facing seat installed correctly. Hopefully you showed them what they did wrong so they can do it themselves whenever the time comes.

  5. #4
    Senior Community Member SPJ&E's Avatar
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    Re: GRRR!! This makes me so mad!!

    You've done all you can do by informing them and they did do well to keep him rear-facing as long as they have. At least you know now, that his seat is installed correctly and hopefully they'll use it correctly too. I'm glad they did let you reinstall the seat and that they aren't fighting you over leaving him RF in your car. Did you show them how to install it correctly in case the need ever arises?

    It sucks when people don't take your advice, but you can't MAKE them. I was very upset a few months ago, to find that my cousin had turned her son around at 13 months, even though she had seen the crash test footage and knew that Pacey and Joshua were both still rear-facing. I just made sure his seat was installed correctly and that's all I can do because he's not mine.

  6. #5
    CPS Technician Ali's Avatar
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    Re: GRRR!! This makes me so mad!!

    I completely understand. I am having this problem with 3 friends whose DDs are younger than mine. One turned her DD for convenience, the other because she kept battling getting in the seat (and she still does FF because they don't believe in telling a child no or stop and the other will as soon as her DD hits 20 lbs because they don't like not being able to see her in the car and RF "doesn't work for their family."

    I think all their reasons are ridiculous and they all know the benefits of RF, so I think they're just negligent.
    DD Jan 2005
    RF to 3 1/2 years; Harnessed to 7 1/2 years; Now Boostered

  7. #6
    Moderator - CPST Instructor snowbird25ca's Avatar
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    Re: GRRR!! This makes me so mad!!

    Knowing what the norm is around here, and how many kids are turned ff'ing even before they are a year old, I think it's great that they at least kept him rf'ing until he was 20mos old.

    The bright side of the picture is that they're allowing you to transport him rf'ing in your vehicle without any pressure to turn him ff'ing, and you know the seat is installed properly in his parents vehicle. While we all like to see kids rf'ing to the limits of the seat, at least they exceeded the bare minimum and almost got him to 2yrs old. That counts for something.
    Trudy - Canadian CPSAC certified CRST Instructor-Trainer and mommy to:
    Janeen - 17 yrs and learning to drive!
    Jillian - 11 yrs, 80'ish lbs, 5-stepping in each car. :O
    Jonas - 8yrs, 65lbs, Riding in an Oobr in each car.
    Both safely riding in either a 2007 Outlook or a 2015 Subaru Legacy depending on the day.


  8. #7
    CPS Fanatic sb518's Avatar
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    Re: GRRR!! This makes me so mad!!

    Quote Originally Posted by snowbird25ca View Post
    Knowing what the norm is around here, and how many kids are turned ff'ing even before they are a year old, I think it's great that they at least kept him rf'ing until he was 20mos old.

  9. #8
    CPS Technician Misty-Bug's Avatar
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    Re: GRRR!! This makes me so mad!!

    dad knew how to install the seat but I informed him better cause he couldn't come down. I told him now that he is FFing to not use the locking clip cause the AOE installs fine without the locking clip when FFing but RFing it goes at an angle. I instructed to get the seat in there as tight as you can FIRST then put the top tether on. I asked him to check it out when he goes back down there. And he also had the foot up correctly so that was a plus. He tried and now I hope he remembers and does it better next time around.
    Misty
    SAHM to Cooper, 04/16/06 and Aurora, 06/25/11


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