WWYD re: seats in IL's cars???

Lemonade

New member
Currently MIL and FIL each have a CA65 installed in their cars. My kids are 38 and 42 lbs. DS (42lbs) is on the top notch, but still fits. DN is 55 lbs and probably 43-44". He turns 5 next week. He rides in their cars far more than my kids because BIL lives with IL's and has DN 2 days a week. He rides in a Graco Affix (on my recommendation and with a coupon I gave him) in BIL's car since outgrowing his BLVD a few months ago. BIL just wants easy and cheap.

MIL's car is an 06ish acura sedan and the way the seat bight is, every seat I've tried in there is impossible to get tight with the seatbelt. FIL's car's belts, '10ish Outback, seem to lock sometimes and not others. So, both seats are currently latched, but obviously that is not good given DN's size. He was closer to 50 lbs and with a 15 lbs seat it was OK, at least in the subaru, vs being loose. When the 4 of them (MIL, FIL, BIL, DN) go out together (regularly) they take the Subaru.

I have 2 SGLs in NIB that I could give them. The current seats are mine so whatever I give them is fine with them. I do not really want either of my kids in a boosters with them, but particularly not DD. However she does ride in a Monterey in my van for short rides so this is really just a double standard with IL's as they are not the bestest drivers (DH's words, not mine). I also don't want to give them boosters and make it so BIL doesn't have to buy his own son a seat (because he's an immature mooch) but the reality is that there needs to be a booster(s) and I'd rather it be a nicer one than whatever piece of crap he buys. His kid will use the seat(s) multiple times a week, mine maybe once a month.

WWYD?
 
ADS

bella_1818

New member
Not let my child ride with IL.

If "they aren't the best driver" and don't use child restraints correctly, then Id make other arrangements once a month for my child's transportation.
 

Lemonade

New member
They aren't horrible. No record of accidents or anything like that. And they do, now that's I've drilled it into them for years, use the seats properly. It's a battle I've fought for years... kids have only been riding with them at all for a little over a year. It's to the point where if I totally prevented it, we'd have marriage issues because, while it's not *perfect*, it's not bad. As it is, I am careful and minimal about leaving the kids with them and pick my battles. I am still refusing to let them spend the night at IL's house, which does not make DH happy. They are only allowed to babysit for certain periods of time at our house. But now they like to take the kids out to dinner. Ugh.
 

mama2girls

New member
I'm sort of confused about the question...

Why can't DN use his own booster in IL's car? Can DD continue to use the harnessed seat and DS use a booster? I know you mentioned you're not really comfortable with the kids using boosters in IL's car, but if it's very rare that they ride with them, would you be okay with that? Or is the problem needing a seat that both DS and DN can use without uninstalling one of your seats?
 

Lemonade

New member
I'm sort of confused about the question...

Why can't DN use his own booster in IL's car? Can DD continue to use the harnessed seat and DS use a booster? I know you mentioned you're not really comfortable with the kids using boosters in IL's car, but if it's very rare that they ride with them, would you be okay with that? Or is the problem needing a seat that both DS and DN can use without uninstalling one of your seats?

I'm sure if I did nothing about it, BIL would eventually buy DN a booster to use in IL's car. But it would be a cheap POS. (I know, they're all tested pass/fail.) Not sure he would want to be bothered to constantly switch the booster back and forth from his own car.

In FIL's car, there can only be one installed seat because FIL has 4 people in his car on a regular basis (one being DN) and the backseat isn't wide enough for 3 across with one being an adult so having both a harness and a booster back there is not possible. In MIL's car, DD can continue to use a harnessed seat. I can also put a booster in there for DN and DS to use. If she is OK with her whole backseat being taken up. Basically we need seats that stay installed. No one wants the hassle of swapping them around and I think the more that happens the more user error we introduce. I'm basically being selfish about providing seats, that I've paid for, for DN to use WAY more than my own kids when BIL is a selfish mooch.
 

Athena

Well-known member
If it's really just once a month, could you just install a seat once a month? Are they really willing to keep an extra seat (in addition to the booster, in both cars) installed the other 29 days for that one day a month?
 
I know you said he's a mooch, but maybe talk to BIL and ask if he would go halfs on a PW. I know your kids will use it more, but it may be a way to make the best of this situation :twocents:

ETA: He may like that it's a cheap and easy option seeing as how you'd likely go out and do the purchasing.
 

Lemonade

New member
I know you said he's a mooch, but maybe talk to BIL and ask if he would go halfs on a PW. I know your kids will use it more, but it may be a way to make the best of this situation :twocents:

ETA: He may like that it's a cheap and easy option seeing as how you'd likely go out and do the purchasing.

Eh, I think it's easier that I don't ask for $$. For one, it's a pain to get any from him. And then who gets the seats when we are done with them and what if he wants to swap it for what's in his car? Since I already have 2 in my house that I got on NBD, I may as well just use them.

Talked to MIL and she says she rarely has more than one adult in her car so she doesn't mind keeping a harness and a booster in her car. FIL's car will just have the booster. They can use FIL's car when BIL and nephew are with them, and MIL's car when both my kids are with them. Last time the took both my kids they took DH's car so this will solve that issue too. Thanks for the comments.
 

cookie123

New member
I'm fussy about my seats. I would just give them a booster to use when your son needs it. I wouldn't want some other kiddo in there all the time mucking it up:)
 

Lemonade

New member
I'm fussy about my seats. I would just give them a booster to use when your son needs it. I wouldn't want some other kiddo in there all the time mucking it up:)

I'd like to be like this but it would be incredibly a$$holic of me to do so and a PITA to switch out whatever BIL would buy DN for a booster/seat I provide for my kids each time they ride with ILs.

Went over tonight and swapped out the CA65 in FIL's car for a gray SGL. MIL has a red CA65 in her car already and I added a red SGL. So it's nice and matchy matchy. I'm fine with it...they've just been sitting in boxes taking up space and I bought them thinking they would end up in IL's cars anyway. I still have plenty of seats for my own use (2 Monts, 1 SGL, 2 FR80s, now 2 CA65s, etc...)
 

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