4yr old on spectrum hates tight straps

smackeen

New member
I am posting this for a friend:

I have a 4 year old son with high functioning autism/Asperger's Syndrome and he gets very upset when I tighten his straps . He screams and cries the entire time we are in the car saying they are too tight. I thought he would get over this but he isn't. I am just wondering if anybody has had this issue before and if they have tips on how to help him enjoy his ride more since it is quite a long one. Thanks soo much!

Any suggestions?
 
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tiggercat

New member
What kind of carseat is it? Has she tried other seats? I.e is it seat specific or general restraint? I've seen kids that couldn't tolerate Evenflo straps with the closely spaced neck straps, some kids are bothered by chest clips or crotch buckles, maybe they need to work on finding harness straps that don't bother this guy.
Oh and I would go over the pinch test to ensure she's not overtightening, and try a fleece in the car (make sure no winter coat is being worn).
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MommyShannon

New member
Can she get him in/out without loosening the straps? My 2 year old who isn't bothered by her straps, always complains they are tight as I tighten them. Once I'm done she's ok, but it never bothers her if they are already set right. I think even my big kids mention it while tightening.
 

tiggercat

New member
MommyShannon said:
Can she get him in/out without loosening the straps? My 2 year old who isn't bothered by her straps, always complains they are tight as I tighten them. Once I'm done she's ok, but it never bothers her if they are already set right. I think even my big kids mention it while tightening.

Oh that reminds me, I am a compulsive harness tightener and any time my kids complained, I did a "fake loosen". I'd hold the release lever and tell them to take a breath (not letting slack out because I held the adjuster strap in my fingers) and then release the lever/button. When they exhaled, it felt looser ;) afaik, they never figured out that I wasn't actually loosening anything, lol.

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smackeen

New member
Oh that reminds me, I am a compulsive harness tightener and any time my kids complained, I did a "fake loosen". I'd hold the release lever and tell them to take a breath (not letting slack out because I held the adjuster strap in my fingers) and then release the lever/button. When they exhaled, it felt looser ;) afaik, they never figured out that I wasn't actually loosening anything, lol.

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Lol. Tricky! ;)
 

tiggercat

New member
smackeen said:
Lol. Tricky! ;)

Well yes, but if it solves both of our problems...

Luckily my youngest likes tight straps (he is a bit of a sensory seeker) so he actually asks me to tighten the straps more.

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VanIsleMommy

Guest
my 4 year old possibly on the spectrum kiddo did this too. we tried everything even boostering but finally just rode it out and told him there was nothing we could do. he got over it, it still bugs him but he doesnt complain.
 
tiggercat said:
Oh that reminds me, I am a compulsive harness tightener and any time my kids complained, I did a "fake loosen". I'd hold the release lever and tell them to take a breath (not letting slack out because I held the adjuster strap in my fingers) and then release the lever/button. When they exhaled, it felt looser ;) afaik, they never figured out that I wasn't actually loosening anything, lol.

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:ROTFLMAO: I do that daily..
 

flipper68

Senior Community Member
Oh that reminds me, I am a compulsive harness tightener and any time my kids complained, I did a "fake loosen". I'd hold the release lever and tell them to take a breath (not letting slack out because I held the adjuster strap in my fingers) and then release the lever/button. When they exhaled, it felt looser ;) afaik, they never figured out that I wasn't actually loosening anything, lol.

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BTDT - many of my young friends and family ride w/o tight harness so they complain when I tug the strap. It WAS tight compared to what they were used to and because they were arched/raising their shoulders. If I ride/drive3 with them enough, they just accept that I'm going to give their harness another tug.
 

gsdguenter

Well-known member
Oh that reminds me, I am a compulsive harness tightener and any time my kids complained, I did a "fake loosen". I'd hold the release lever and tell them to take a breath (not letting slack out because I held the adjuster strap in my fingers) and then release the lever/button. When they exhaled, it felt looser ;) afaik, they never figured out that I wasn't actually loosening anything, lol.

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Yup, I do that with DD2 also :)

DD1 loooooves tight straps, so that an easy one.

Another thought though, DD2 (the one I have to fake-loosen the straps for) doesn't like the harness pads on. She was constantly tugging at them and ripping them off. I finally gave up and took them off. Now she's happy as a clam (well, mostly)
 
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VanIsleMommy

Guest
Lol my 4 year old has gone the other way now. I explained the safety issue of loose straps and now he gives me or dh crap if he feels its too loose :) I don't know what will happen when we turn him ff though, he hates the radian harness pads.
 
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VanIsleMommy

Guest
Yep I'm thinking we will have to. He reeeeally hates those pads.

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