Do you insist on proper car seat safety for other kids in your car

niccig

New member
I sometimes drive other kids in my car age 2-3 yo. Their parents have them FF, so I put their seat FF in my car. I would prefer the other kids to be RF as it's safer, but it's the parent's call and legally they can be FF. My DS is the same age/size as their kids, but he RF and probably will until he's 4.

But what happens when a 3 or 4yo turns up with a backless booster? :eek: There's no way I will use that in my car. But the parent says it's my kid and this is what I want? I expect them to respect my wishes when my kid is in their car. Does it work both ways?? :confused:

I think I'll just say no to all car pools to make it easier on me
 
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CandCfam

New member
Yes, I do. If they are riding in my car, then they are my responsibility.
I have been watching my 4 Y/O nephew lately, and my stipulation was that they had to buy a high back booster for him, or he'd be riding in a my DD's pink Parkway.:p
They have him, well, had him, in a backless booster.
 

CRS

Senior Community Member
hell yes it works both ways! Yes it IS their kid but how are YOU going to feel if you're in a crash and they're hurt real bad because they were not properly restrained? No doubt they'd sue you too!! Can you afford to buy your own HBB?
 

chickenman

New member
whats so bad about a backless bosster as compared to a high back booster? Assuming the car has headrests, and the belt is placed correctly on the child?
 

Jordynsmama

New member
Yep b/c you are liable and if Something happened you would feel responsible. Your car your choice...(unless you are being unsafe of course)
I am a nanny for a 9 yr old boy who is only 47 lbs and maybe 47". I begain when he had just had his 7th bday...he must have been 40lbs and been 43-44". Well in his parents car they used absoluetly NOTHING. not even a bb. But they had an old combo seat leftover I used in my car for him-the kind with the clips on the side, no SIP from Next step or something. Then a lil while ago I realized the seat was crap(no foam) but not expired anyway..so I bought a bb for him...his mom wouldnt care at all if I did use anything but...I know he is completely unsafe with nothing and if he died/got hurt I would feel guilty and I would be guilty IMO b/c I know better. And its illegal b/c he is not 60lbs.
Now if it is a 2 yr old that is moderate size and the parents want you to keep them ff then I personally would feel fine. If they were 22 lbs then maybe not...
 

Jordynsmama

New member
whats so bad about a backless bosster as compared to a high back booster? Assuming the car has headrests, and the belt is placed correctly on the child?

I feel the major difference is they have no SIP....they are free to move side to side, there head is not protected on the side and their whole body is exposed....I feel a hbb protects and encases them much much better. Especially a good one with great SIP like the Britax Parkway which we use in grammas car. I would never ever ever use a backless for my almost 5 yr old 46lbs and 42" dd. Maybe in a year in the middle in an emergency.
 

niccig

New member
Yes, I do. It's my car.
My friend's just turned 2-year-old and 23lbs is FF in her car. In my car she rear-faces.

How did you bring this up with the mother? I'm just curious how you broached the subject.

I haven't had an issue yet, but I'm fairly sure the playgroup mums will move their kids to boosters before I'm comfortable having them in a booster in my car. I do have spare seats, and I can put them in my DS's BV when they outgrow their 40lb seats. Or, I can get a HBB if they are of acceptable age.

I just wonder where/how you draw the line, and how you tell the other parents, because in way it is a criticism of their decision. For my kid, it's RF until limits, and harnessed until limits of HWH seat. But I don't think other parents I know will do the same.
 

chickenman

New member
Yep b/c you are liable and if Something happened you would feel responsible. Your car your choice...(unless you are being unsafe of course)
I am a nanny for a 9 yr old boy who is only 47 lbs and maybe 47". I begain when he had just had his 7th bday...he must have been 40lbs and been 43-44". Well in his parents car they used absoluetly NOTHING. not even a bb. But they had an old combo seat leftover I used in my car for him-the kind with the clips on the side, no SIP from Next step or something. Then a lil while ago I realized the seat was crap(no foam) but not expired anyway..so I bought a bb for him...his mom wouldnt care at all if I did use anything but...I know he is completely unsafe with nothing and if he died/got hurt I would feel guilty and I would be guilty IMO b/c I know better. And its illegal b/c he is not 60lbs.
Now if it is a 2 yr old that is moderate size and the parents want you to keep them ff then I personally would feel fine. If they were 22 lbs then maybe not...

why is it illegal, i thought cali was a 6 or 60 state? and we were pushing for 8 or 80
 

Cindy&Connor

New member
I agree with everyone else. My car, my rules.

When I first found this site my 16 mo 22 lb niece was ffing in my car and my sil's car. I turned her back rfing immediately and her mom knew. Not too long after that she asked me to turn her rfing in her car too. :D She's still rfing in both cars at 26 months and 27 lbs.
 

cdncasper

New member
I install the seats myself (since I have 4) once I know who will be in my vehicle so I make the decision who they are. So far I have had no issues whatsoever since all the ones small enough to be RF are still RF in their parents vehicle and I haven't had many over 4 yrs old.
I did have a 6 yr old in the van that would normally be in just a seatbelt in her grandma's van but in mine she was in a harnessed seat or booster. She had no issues with it and actually liked doing it up.
 

MsFacetious

New member
Yep when I agreed to babysit I made the rule the kids ride my way in my vehicle. The mother actually decided to keep him RF in her car too after learning about it.

That parent could turn around and sue me if the kid gets hurt or killed in an accident, in my car they will be as safe as possible. If the parent objects they don't ride with me, period.
 

carseatcoach

Carseat Crankypants
I absolutely insist on the legal minimums. I respect some parental decisions that are different from mine; for instance, even though MY (hypothetical) 29-pound 29-monther would be RF and MY 42-pound 5-year-old is in a harness, I'd probably be okay with the first child FF/harnessed and the second one in a HBB if that's what the parents wanted.
 

bobandjess99

Senior Community Member
Well, I would absolutely insist on the legal minimums, that is for certain. I would not transport a child in an illegal manner.
now, as for the huge gray area between "legal" and "safe".....it would just depend. Basically, I would likely do it, since I personally don't have the $$$ to have a bunch of extra seats lying around for occasional use, so I have to use what is provided, as long as it is within our shockingly horrible state law.
 

3acorns4Christy

New member
YES! If they ride in my car then they will ride the safest possible way for the seats I have or they put in my car. That means a 2year old friend of mine from playgroup needed a ride home, her dh dropped off the convertable carseat (she lives really close to me) and I put her 2 yo RF because she is less then 35lbs (AOE). Mom wasn't thrilled but knew that I RF until upper limits in my car so that is just something she assumed I would do.
Her dd loved it! hehe
 

Misty-Bug

New member
I haven't read the other reply's but maybe you should say no to car pools.
Personally I would treat them the same as my child. It is MY car and I choose how to protect them within the car. If the parent doesn't like it then they can find other transportation.
I am supposed to watch a child that is a week older then cooper but MUCH MUCH smaller and she wanted to turn her son FFing. I said that I would do what ever she wanted and stated my case for RFing. Then I said if you want him FFing that is fine but I will still install him RFing in my car because that is how I choose to protect the children. She opted to keep him RFing all together ;)
so personally I would treat any kid in my car with the knowledge that I have and have them properly restrained.
 

Defrost

Moderator - CPSTI Emeritus
As the driver, I am responsible for the passengers, whether they're adults or children. In this case, it is NOT the parents' call, it's my call, both from a moral perspective and a legal one. I could get sued or even face criminal charges for not properly restraining all the passengers in my vehicle, and that means I get to say who sits where and with what kind of restraints! :)
 

mommy2env

Active member
Yes, so far I have MADE children follow MY rules.

My dd's school friend, she is 6 and only 45lbs. That day her mother was with us, and when I opened the door and helped the little girl get on the booster her mom looked confused. She asked me why I still had my dd in the regent. I saw that as an opportunity to shine some light onto her. The little girl was okay with riding in the parkway.

My 7yr old nephew rides in a pink parkway, in his parents vehicle-NOTHING.

My 2yr old great nephew, rides in my dd's ashley floral, rear facing. Parents vehicle- forward facing, and hes only 28lbs.

My friend's dd also rides in the parkway.

Now, when the whinning begins "but, but, but, my mom doesnt make me ride in a booster!" or "im not a baby I dont need/like this booster"

I simply say:

"Well, I am not your mother. I have certain rules that need to be followed. You dont have to like them, you just have to follow them. Its my car, and you will ride in it the way I want you to. Your safer this way anyway"

then they shut up and dont complain anymore :p

It may be different with total with other people. but if they are comfortable enough to ask for a ride, then you should be comfortable enough to make them do it your way.
 

stayinhomewithmy6

Senior Community Member
My situation is a little bit different because I am transporting daycare kids, so the parents usually don't have a say in how I restrain them because they aren't there at the time! You won't even believe that in 4 yrs of doing daycare, I've never had a single parent ask how I transport kids when we go places. We go places often and the parents always know about it beforehand, but nobody has ever asked, not once. I provide all of my own seats because I don't want to have to deal with the expired, recalled, or abused seats that I have seen so many kids ride in around here. My car seat situation changes depending on what kids I have here on any given day. I keep all of the kids RF to 33 or 35 lbs and none of them go into boosters until they are over 40 lbs and 4 yrs (usually around 5 yrs old)... and usually they stay in harnesses, too, when I have enough harnesses to go around.
 

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