Unsolicited car seat advice - do you? don't you?

CRS · Aug 12, 2007

If you see someone doing something that isn't quite safe i.e. not tightening the harness enough, maybe wrong belt path for the seatbelt, maybe the handle is up - stuff like that. Do you say something? Or do you leave it, since they never asked you for advice in the first place. And I'm asking, as if you have NEVER met the person, don't know who they are or don't know them very well.

bbartlettnfld · Aug 12, 2007

I haven't voted yet... Reason is I used too all the time, I would introduce myself, tell them I was a tech with our local CS action group and let them know they had some misuse issues.

I stopped doing it, when it just seemed like that was all I was doing whenever I was out... It was too depressing..

BethAnn

Erika Ruth · Aug 12, 2007

My community is pretty responsive. So, I say something gentle, like, oh, I have heard.... Such and such isn't such a good idea. Do you know what your manual says? (mostly we get LATCH and BELT here).

Erika

CDNTech · Aug 12, 2007

I generally say something when it's really bad. I introduce myself as a tech and say something about the hazards of the job and my needing to say something.

People respond really well and are generally really appreciative... I've never had someone get upset at me for correcting a misuse.

Morganthe · Aug 12, 2007

No, I don't .... but I didn't mark the poll because the "none of my business" was on there. Honestly, it's not my business, but I wouldn't mind it. I've come to the conclusion that it's not safe or appreciated for me to stick my neck out for the locals.

The responses from parents I've received the few times here ranged from indifference to absolute hostility. I'm not a tech, so I don't even have that going for me.

It's absolute futility, especially when the saddest situations are low income Hispanics with babies. My help is definitely not wanted or heeded. Even having a soft approach resulted in an agressive reaction from the mother and grandmother to 'stay within my people.'

Then there's the whites who put their kids in adult seatbelts at dd's age and size in brand spanking new trucks. They definitely don't want my 'help' either. They know what's best for their child.

The change has to come from within the society or by the State to implement laws for larger toddlers - preschoolers. Lil' ole me is just not going to put myself out anymore. It's not good for my own health and ultimately, I have to be the best parent for my child, not other people's.

Erika Ruth · Aug 12, 2007

I was at Target the other day, and I saw a hugely pregnant woman buying Pool Noodles. She commented, I bet you are getting your noodle for a totally different reason than I am...

"My husband wants to try the noodle to see if he can get our carseat in better..."

People here run into problems because they try TOO hard. (That is how I ran into trouble too... (Mighty Tight a LONG time ago)).

Erika

Avery'sMama · Aug 12, 2007

I do say something when it is REALLY bad, like the person I saw who had an old 3-point infant seat w/o a base and the straps TIED in the back! I also say something to people like the mom's in my mom group, clients in food/nutrition classes I teach, etc. So if I have an "in" I will say something, or if it's terrible. I want to print up little cards to tuck under peoples windshield wipers for when you can see through windows that the seats are in wrong, unsafe, etc.

StarrNanny · Aug 12, 2007

I used to do it all the time, it got too depressing that I couldn't even go to the grocery without telling someone in the parking lot about how wrong the seat in their car was. Now I only do it if it is really bad, and i still call police if I am driving and see no use or misuse. I do also offer advice when i am in the car seat aisle of a store and I see or overhear very confused parents talking about what seat to buy.

sb518 · Aug 12, 2007

I voted no, I'm not a tech yet so I don't really have anything to back my words up

Suzibeck · Aug 12, 2007

I didn't vote. I will say something if it is someone I know, but with strangers, I don't. A while back, I noticed dd's Sunday School teacher had a Mighty Tight in her car. I don't know her well, but I did talk to her and she really appreciated it. I also suggested that she get her seat checked out at SafeKids and told her where our fitting station is.

Since I'm not a tech, I feel like I have no authority to say something to strangers. If I become a tech, I'll probably say something if it is major misuse. With friends, I feel like I should say something and most of the time people are at least polite about it.

chaoticoctopus · Aug 12, 2007

I didn't vote. I'm inconsistent about it, as it depends totally on each individual situation. Sometimes I've offered a polite suggestion or bit of information ("excuse me, but I couldn't help but notice..." approach), and a couple of times now I've just gotten in my car and called the local police to see if they thought it was worthy of looking into.

snowbird25ca · Aug 12, 2007

For awhile I pretty much spoke with everyone I noticed - mainly babies in carrier in stores that weren't buckled in tightly. Now I sometimes approach people, sometimes I don't. It depends on the "vibe" I get from them and how serious the misuse is. In some cases now I've taken to leaving a leaflet and business card on their windshield.

I still notice all the misuse and it bugs the heck out of me, but I would drive myself crazy if I tried to talk to every single person. I do frequently talk to people in the car seat aisle when they're trying to decide on seats though... Most people are more receptive and appreciative of help when they're in a car seat aisle and trying to figure out what seat they need. :thumbsup:

MomtoLE · Aug 12, 2007

I mis-voted! I put Yes Always, but meant "Yes but only if it's REALLY BAD misuse"

I'm also not a Tech so I'm tactful with my approach and it's mostly friend of mine of my fellow church goers.

nurse_reedle · Aug 13, 2007

Morganthe said:
the saddest situations are low income Hispanics with babies.

Then there's the whites who put their kids in adult seatbelts at dd's age and size in brand spanking new trucks.

Can you please clarify what you meant here. I am having trouble understanding your intent. I don't want to assume the intent that I am reading here.

CRS · Aug 13, 2007

nurse_reedle said:
Can you please clarify what you meant here. I am having trouble understanding your intent. I don't want to assume the intent that I am reading here.

I can't talk for Morganthe but at a guess I would say what she meant was that perhaps the low socio economic community in her area is compromised mainly of Hispanics? and maybe most of the high socio economic people are Caucasians who are mass stereotyped as people who should "know better"? I dunno *shrug* just a guess. I don't even know what a Hispanic is! LOL

libranbutterfly · Aug 13, 2007

I'm inconsistant about it. I will gladly talk car seats with anyone that will listen, and sometimes I start the conversation, but generally I call the buckle that child hotline and/or put one of the safetybelt safe checklists with the # for our health dept to get it checked or get a new seat. I'm non confrontational.

amy919 · Aug 13, 2007

I didn't vote, but I'll respond. First off, I'm not a tech, just your average car seat fanatic

. I will say something to parents at the girls' school. Mostly because I know them, we're friendly and I can work it into conversations. I might say something if I saw someone clearly breaking the law, like a 2 years in a seat belt, but I'm not sure. It would depend on the situation. I'm not going to put myself or my kids in a dangerous situation to potentially argue with a stranger. I might try, but if it wasn't well received, I'd shut up. If they were doing something seriously dangerous and illegal, I would likely call the police.

skaterbabs · Aug 13, 2007

I do, but not EVERY time.
And I only start out the conversation about car seats if it's somethinf deadly like a FF infant seat.

I always start by admiring the babies. "He has the most GORGEOUS eyes!", "oh, I LOVE her CURLS!", "What an ADORABLE baby!" :thumbsup: Or I "let" Joyjoy notice the baby. "Mommom! That's a LITTLE baby!" Most people think it's just too cute when a small child ooohs an aahhs over their infant.

Mama2J · Aug 13, 2007

I usually will not say anything to a stranger about it. I liked the idea of leaving a note on the person's windshield though for a parked car. I also have a hard time saying something about it even to people that I know, unless it is a misuse that is hard to ignore.

chaoticoctopus · Aug 13, 2007

nurse_reedle said:
Can you please clarify what you meant here. I am having trouble understanding your intent. I don't want to assume the intent that I am reading here.

My take: sometimes, describing a demographic group looks/sounds like stereotyping, but there are very few ways to say "poor, uneducated minorities" or "middle-class, educated Caucasians" without sounding a little politically incorrect.... :twocents:

It's easy to forget, or discount, that in some places, that's just the way it *really* is...

Unsolicited car seat advice - do you? don't you?

Do you give unsolicited car seat advice?

Yes - always! I don't care what the mother/father/guardian says!

Yes but only if it's REALLY BAD misuse

No, never - it's none of my business

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