Question Am I wrong

Vdavis · May 27, 2011

So here is my situation. My husband and I rented a 12 passenger van for a family reunion and plan to leave in am. We are taking our 5 kids mil and 2 cousins at least that was the plan. Our uncle droped off his daughter and grand daughter. When they pulled up the 3 yr old was in no car seat or seat belt. I asked where her car seat was.(she weighs no more than 25 pounds and was a super premie) I was told they dont think she needs.a car seat so I offered one our daughter doesnt fit in. I will not drive 6 hours with her not in a car seat. This started a big conflict with the uncle and cousin(her mom). Is there a law in illinois specifically requiring her to be in a seat based on age and size. I dont want to start a family war but I am not willing to be open to legal consequences or have our family be unsafe in an accident. What would you do and do I have option to require carseat or refuse to take them with.

carseatcoach · May 27, 2011

Illinois requires proper CSR (child safety restraint) usage to age eight.

You can't make them use a CSR, although you can report non-usage. You can refuse to let them in the van you rented without a CSR.

beetlemama · May 27, 2011

It's definitely illegal for a 3 year old to not ride in a carseat, regardless of the parents feeling she doesn't need it. I would just let them know that you will not drive with a child who is not legally restrained and leave the decision to them. Given her age and size that is something I would consider reporting to the police. While I know not everyone follows perfect use, ERF, EH, etc, this could be a case of neglect that child services would intervene in. You can report anonymously.

canadiangie · May 27, 2011

What would I do? Laugh in their faces and go install a car seat for her.

Thats utter nonsense and I urge you to stand your ground. Under no circumstances do you take that toddler in your vehicle without a proper child restraint.

Family war. Good grief people are dumb. I'm sorry you're dealing with this.

opheliajoy · May 27, 2011

canadiangie said:
What would I do? Laugh in their faces and go install a car seat for her.

Thats utter nonsense and I urge you to stand your ground. Under no circumstances do you take that toddler in your vehicle without a proper child restraint.

Family war. Good grief people are dumb. I'm sorry you're dealing with this.

This.

Vdavis · May 27, 2011

Well that was lots of fun. My husband called my dad as he signed the rental with us for the discount and also thinking grandparent to grandparent maybe uncle would listen to him. That didnt work I have never heard of anyone refusing safety for their child. Dad even called k (state trooper friend). She tried showing videos and the requirements. We all gave up and k is filing a formal report when she goes in tonight. As for the family they wont be going with us. I didnt even say rf all I wanted was the child in a car seat for her safety and ours but somehow my husband my dad and I are all wrong. Oh well I guess you cant force people to keep their children alive. Sorry for the vent but if my husbands side had their choice theyd probably stick a playpen in the back of a van and let the kids have fun.

aisraeltax · May 27, 2011

wow! good for you and your husband and your dad though...great that you have such supportive men in your life.
i hope that little girl is never involved in an accident...i truly truly do.

Jan06twinmom · May 27, 2011

I'm so glad that you, your dad and your DH are all on the same page.

Unfortunately, as you already know, the consequences of an accident with her not being restrained properly will be devistating for your family.

Melanie

Vdavis · May 27, 2011

Yeas they are both very insistant on if a kid fits in a car seat they sit in one. When my oldest 3 kids were 1,5 &6 a drunk driver ran a light hit us and flipped our jeep. If they werent in car seats they wouldnt be here. Thats also why we dont have toys in the car they will hurt you in a bad accident. And my thoughts are you can be the greatest driver ever but there are still others on the road you cant control.

hrice · May 27, 2011

I just want to cry for that poor little girl. Those people are ignorant. I hope they are never proven wrong if you KWIM. :crying:

cookie123 · May 28, 2011

I'm glad you stood your ground. What the $#(*$R& is wrong with people. Who says no, I don't want my kid to be safe. Especially when faced with opposition, in that type of situation it seems like most people would just go with the flow.

Have a fun trip!

DahliaRW · May 28, 2011

I don't know about your state, but here in WA I am legally responsible to make sure any minor under the age of 16 is properly restrained. If that's the case where you are, you have a very valid legal reason to refuse to transport as well.

LISmama810 · May 28, 2011

DahliaRW said:
I don't know about your state, but here in WA I am legally responsible to make sure any minor under the age of 16 is properly restrained. If that's the case where you are, you have a very valid legal reason to refuse to transport as well.

In CA the driver wouldn't get the ticket if a parent is in the car, too (the parent would) but that's not a technicality I'd advertise, and frankly it doesn't matter.

opheliajoy · May 28, 2011

Wow. Sorry so much drama! We've had similar issues with my sister, though she knows if she wants to rise together, all must be properly retrained. It IS tough. My sis just drove 850 miles with her 3yr old alternating between a low back booster and a rear facing harness-less GN We live in such different worlds! 

Vdavis · May 28, 2011

So we got here without the cousins or mil cause they are having hissy fits. The "family matriarch" acctually agreed with us. Shes 98 and the great grandma of 3 yr old. I wanted to share her thoughts. In illinois the car seat heigjt is 4ft9in shes 4ft6in and stated as follows .
I have my own adult car seat and have to sit in the back seat and if its good enough for me then that spoiled brat can get her but in one to. Needless to say she made it clear to everyone so far that if you dont like the rules dont have kids

canadiangie · May 28, 2011

Vdavis said:
So we got here without the cousins or mil cause they are having hissy fits. The "family matriarch" acctually agreed with us. Shes 98 and the great grandma of 3 yr old. I wanted to share her thoughts. In illinois the car seat heigjt is 4ft9in shes 4ft6in and stated as follows .
I have my own adult car seat and have to sit in the back seat and if its good enough for me then that spoiled brat can get her but in one to. Needless to say she made it clear to everyone so far that if you dont like the rules dont have kids

I love it.

Darn right get that kid's butt in a seat!

opheliajoy · May 29, 2011

canadiangie said:
I love it.

Darn right get that kid's butt in a seat!

me too, that's an awesome attitude!!

mylittlet · May 29, 2011

Good job for standing your ground. And talking with the great grandma. Maybe someone will get through to them.

Stefanie - CPStech in Iowa

Qarin · May 29, 2011

opheliajoy said:
My sis just drove 850 miles with her 3yr old alternating between a low back booster and a rear facing harness-less GN We live in such different worlds! 

A rear-facing, harnessless.....

(I suppose you mean rear-facing as-a-booster, which is a tiny bit less ack, but....

)

bethng · May 30, 2011

Qarin said:
A rear-facing, harnessless.....

(I suppose you mean rear-facing as-a-booster, which is a tiny bit less ack, but.... )

how would that even work when rear facing a GN? I cant picture how someone could use it as a booster rear facing.

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