Question Need Advice. Sister in law has 1.5 year old in backless booster.

aleonard1509 · Apr 4, 2011

I need some serious advice. I feel very strongly about car seat safety and have plans to keep my 8 month old daughter safely rear facing as long as possible. WIth that being said, my sister in law has a 1.5 year old (who is only 20 lbs i might add) who has been forward facing since the day she turned a year and just this past week was moved out of her car seat into a BACKLESS booster! My husband has just calmed me down and strongly stated that it is not our business and we cannot do anything about it except make sure our daughter is safely secured in the car. He does not want to upset his brother or his wife, but this really upsets me. I know i need to listen to my husbands wishes but i just needed to get this out and needed some re-assurance that i am not crazy to be concerned about this.

Thanks

autumnlily · Apr 4, 2011

What she is doing is against the law and child endangerment. You have every right to be concerned and report it.

amie815 · Apr 4, 2011

I would call the police and report her. That child's life is in danger.

hrice · Apr 4, 2011

Umm...that is his nephew! Doesn't HE care?!

aleonard1509 · Apr 4, 2011

We have tried approaching her before about another issue (feeding her 3 month old bottles that have been left out all night long) and all it did was cause a huge uproar that we were trying to tell her how to parent. My husband said hopefully she will get pulled over and that would be better than us causing more tension between us.

Laurelz · Apr 4, 2011

I'd call her plates in and report it. If she asks later if you did it, then I'd say "yes I did, because you wouldn't listen to reason and I had no other option.. it's ILLEGAL!"

SusanMae · Apr 4, 2011

Wait until she leaves, then call the non-emergency line to report it. Do you go to the same pedi? Maybe mention it to them?

Susan

aleonard1509 · Apr 4, 2011

we live 3 states away

jjordan · Apr 4, 2011

Honestly, I don't know that reporting it to the police will necessarily do any good. Many police are not well-informed of car seat laws. (And, depending on the state, there may not be a minimum age/weight for boostering in the law. Most have a "proper use" clause of some sort, and since no backless booster is recommended for a 20# 1 year old, it is technically illegal. But it might be hard to find a police officer who will actually do anything about it.)

What are the chances that your il's would do something about it if they knew that it was dangerous? Or, if you're FB friends, you could try posting articles about car safety on your wall and hope that she notices.

Sorry, it's a tough situation, hope that you can figure out something!

sholoulou · Apr 4, 2011

I would approach the subject anyway. Start with something positive like you know she is a great mom and you know she likes to know the very best for her child, etc. Then bring up the carseat issue briefly and see how she responds. If it is positive give her more info. If she shuts you down, drop it and end the conversation positive. If she is not open now she may be in a couple weeks or so. Maybe be in the look out for a carseat safety check in her area and let her know about it... just say it in a way that is makes her look good and that she knows alot about parenting. You can cringe on the other end of the phone without her knowing.

I do not understand why people rush into a booster. I think it is so much easier to leave them in a 5 point harness. They can buckle themselves eariler, they do not move around, they sleep easier, etc.

turtlemama · Apr 4, 2011

Is this something that child protective services could talk to her about? I remember when I was young, my mom was so afraid of them that if someone mentioned anything about them coming out, she straightened everything up and made everything look perfect. I don't know if they deal with car seat stuff though. I agree that the police won't necessarily do any good, but it never hurts to ask them anyway.

Laurelz · Apr 4, 2011

aleonard1509 said:
we live 3 states away

What state do they live in? I agree, will your in-laws help you?

aleonard1509 · Apr 5, 2011

so i tried posting a status on facebook saying i found this awesome article outlining new guidlines for car seats and it was so interesting hoping she will see it. i vented to my mother in law and she just says she is going to do what she wants regardless and i shouldnt say anything. they are in north carolina. from what i read of the car seat law it says car seat till age 4 booster till age 8. but maybe i misunderstood. can people use a booster as a car seat? are they not 2 different things?

carseatcoach · Apr 5, 2011

North Carolina law does not differentiate between a booster and a harnessed seat. A properly used -- according to manufacturer's directions -- restraint (booster or harnessed seat) is required to 8y or 80#. A backless booster is NOT a properly used restraint for an 18mo/20# child as there are none that are rated for use with a child that young and small.

Where in NC is she?

opaque1997 · Apr 5, 2011

Ok - I'm sorry I've been watching this and though I agree that the child needs to be in a seat and something needs to be done

PLEASE BE CAREFUL WHEN CALLING CPS

CPS is a great org for what they do - but once you are 'flagged' in their system it can be really rough - even minor things can be a battle.. just be careful.

I'm not sure what an officer would do if they saw a kid in a booster that young - would they even know any better? I have called the non emergent line on parents (at a gas station with an infant and no seat) - no idea what the resolution was.

Its hard situation - I already panic when I watch my g/f put her kids in seats that I don't think are safe ENOUGH - even though they aren't expired - are being used correctly (mostly - maybe a twisted strap and missing a top tether but in relation to this minor things).

Is it something you could purchase a COOL seat and send it down for a event (mother's day?) something that she'd want to use because it looks so comfy / easy / fun?

(More thinking with an older kid - aka my g/f's kid - bought her a pink rainbow booster - man there is not getting her NOT to sit in it - etc)

I have no idea what I'd do - I've had to eat crow with my family on ERF and I just keep saying - its not as safe - but its not UNSAFE - this however.. I agree - I'd be crying and frantic..

mamakc · Apr 5, 2011

chickabiddy said:
A backless booster is NOT a properly used restraint for an 18mo/20# child as there are none that are rated for use with a child that young and small.

Isn't the cosco backless labeled for over 1 year and 20lbs still? :thumbsdown:

carseatcoach · Apr 5, 2011

mamakc said:
Isn't the cosco backless labeled for over 1 year and 20lbs still? :thumbsdown:

I think it's 1y and 40#. Maybe 30#? Pretty sure not 20#.

christineka · Apr 5, 2011

mamakc said:
Isn't the cosco backless labeled for over 1 year and 20lbs still? :thumbsdown:

It's 1 year, 30 pounds, and 34 inches.

Kobain's Mommy · Apr 5, 2011

Could you buy a seat from ToysRus.com and send it anomalously?

aleonard1509 · Apr 5, 2011

Believe me if i could afford it i would buy her a seat. we spent every penny we had saved up to buy my daughter her new rf seat since she outgrew her infant seat by height. We have a very limited budget since i stay home with our daughter (and our new baby that will be born this fall!) I joked about buying her a seat and my husband said if we could spare the money we would buy one and send it to them. The thing is she had her ff in a evenflo tribute sport. I dont understand why she took her out of that to put her in a booster? THis kid is tiny just barely 20lbs.
Oh and i can pretty much guarantee that she did not read the recommended age/height/weight on the box. She most likely let her daughter point out which color she wanted.

Question Need Advice. Sister in law has 1.5 year old in backless booster.

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