Should I let dd go? WWYD?

mommy2jana

New member
My wonderful job does not give us the day off for Memorial Day - we're a moving company so this is our busiest time of year. We do, however, get a "floating holiday" to use another time of the year. DF also has to work. Jana's daycare is closed on Memorial Day. I could get the day off and stay home - lose my floating holiday - and I will if that's what's best.

I thought about my sister and bil babysitting - when I called her last night, they are planning to drive up to GA for the weekend - about an 8 hour trip. They want to take Jana with them....but I'm not sure how I feel about that. It's not that I don't trust them, they know how neurotic I am about car safety and will make sure she's safely and properly restrained in her Marathon or Regent the whole trip. I'm just not sure how I feel about my child being in a car for 8 hours that isn't driven by me! I know they are safe drivers, but its other people out on the road you have to worry about. It is afterall, Memorial Day weekend. They will be on the interstate almost the whole way. They will either need to borrow my car, or will borrow my mom's SUV - they own a 2-seater.

WWYD???
 
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mominabigtruck

New member
I would let her go, I don't see what the big deal is? My ds will go home with anybody so he's always bugging to call somebody and see if he can go visit. As long as I put his seat in and explain how to use it I'm fine.
 

Morganthe

New member
It sounds as if you'd be letting her go the entire weekend and if you let them use your car, you won't be able to visit up there. Right? So that's 16 hours in a vehicle r/t. Or would you go get her eventually?

I can see why you're concerned. If it's the length of time she's away from you and the long drives, then say no. If it's only because you're worried about her safety in the car, then consider that she's old enough to remind them about buckling her in. Yould be able to check out the install before they left and just make them promise the carseat won't be moved or anything.

I don't have siblings or relatives that dd would travel with, so I don't know what else to say about trust issues. She goes with us, me or daddy, and that's it :shrug-shoulders: We've only been separated 2x and that's when I've spent nights in hospitals. Sorry can't help more.

Do what your gut feels is best. :thumbsup:
 

amy919

New member
I would be OK with it from a safety standpoint. My issue would be the length of the trip. I'm not crazy about being any more than 2 hours away from my kids at a given time unless I have to be. I don't know why 2 hours, I guess it's just an arbitrary number I came up with. I just like my kids close by me or DH.

Amy
 

Victorious4

Senior Community Member
If she wants to go, I'd let her -- if you want I could mail you a WHALE packet (We Have A Little Emergency): sticker to put on the carseat with child's photo + contact information for rescue workers.... Crashes are much less common on highways than on local roads not only because local roads are traveled more frequently but because highway traffic moves smoother, cars heading in the same direction, without all the intersections. Trust for the adults is paramount & if you've got that I see no reason to prevent kiddo from having a good time :) The WHALE stickers would just be an added measure of security for you just in case.
 

Yoshi

New member
Personally, I am a BIG worrier, and I haven't let my DD ride with anyone else besides DH (and she is 4) plus she's never been away from me overnight either. Bearing in mind that my opinion is skewed by my own worries- I am probably not a good judge of the risk- but I wouldn't let her go. It would be just too far away for my comfort level. Lots of people have no problem doing those things (I was the complete opposite when my DS was little- I was younger and less paranoid;) )
 

Melizerd

New member
If she wants to go, I'd let her -- if you want I could mail you a WHALE packet (We Have A Little Emergency): sticker to put on the carseat with child's photo + contact information for rescue workers.... Crashes are much less common on highways than on local roads not only because local roads are traveled more frequently but because highway traffic moves smoother, cars heading in the same direction, without all the intersections. Trust for the adults is paramount & if you've got that I see no reason to prevent kiddo from having a good time :) The WHALE stickers would just be an added measure of security for you just in case.

Is that like the CHAD stickers? I need a new one for the new car seat and don't have a clue how to get one.


As for the OP if you would take her yourself I'd let her go...if you think its too far in too short of time and wouldn't then I probably wouldn't.
 

mommy2jana

New member
I'm not concerned with where she'll be and how far away from me she will be - she'd be going with her aunt and uncle to her other aunt and uncle's house. She's made the trip with me many times before. I wouldn't be going up there at all (unless there were an emergency). They would be leaving Friday evening and coming back on Monday. While I've never been apart from dd that long, I don't have a problem with it since she's almost 4 years old now.

My concern is just her being in a car that's not driven by me for that length of time on one of the deadliest weekends of the year. I know they'll use her seat correctly, and that it won't be moved....and if it is, my sister is just as good as I am at installing.

I know Jana would have a blast - I guess I should stop worrying and just let her go....but I'm a mom, I can't stop worrying!
 

mommy2jana

New member
If she wants to go, I'd let her -- if you want I could mail you a WHALE packet (We Have A Little Emergency): sticker to put on the carseat with child's photo + contact information for rescue workers.... Crashes are much less common on highways than on local roads not only because local roads are traveled more frequently but because highway traffic moves smoother, cars heading in the same direction, without all the intersections. Trust for the adults is paramount & if you've got that I see no reason to prevent kiddo from having a good time :) The WHALE stickers would just be an added measure of security for you just in case.

I was thinking of something like that, but didn't know where to get them! I'd love one, or if you could point me in the direction of where to get one. Thanks!

It makes me feel better knowing that crashes are less common on highways than local roads. That was my main concern.
 

Victorious4

Senior Community Member
Is that like the CHAD stickers? I need a new one for the new car seat and don't have a clue how to get one.
Not sure, probably -- what does CHAD stand for? I got my WHALE stickers through the local hospital: not sure if they only give them to parents in the new baby safety class + CPSTs :confused: But, they're free & I have dozens upon dozens so I can spare a few. Just PM me your address.

I'd also have a really hard time letting Leila go for that long, but if she really wanted to go & I trusted the adults (as well my kid to tell me all about everything: call frequently, etc.) & if I didn't have a safer + more interesting alternative, then I'd go for it.... 2 years ago my oppinion would have been different, but ever since I allowed myself to spend an entire weekend away having adult fun I have discovered the value in both experiences apart as well as time together :love: Worrying comes with the territory of parenthood, though, always has always will (at least it always should) ;)
 

Melizerd

New member
CHAD is Children Have An iDentity too. They're stickers you put on the bottom of the car seat with the child's name, parents name, emergency contact other then parent and pedi's info.

Thanks! I'll PM you.
 

beeman

Active member
I'd say let her go. If she's with good drivers, they'll be able to avoid an accident just as well as you can. She'll have a blast!
 

AdventureMom

Senior Community Member
I couldn't do it. It's just too far away for me to be comfortable being away from my child.

That's how I feel. Even though she will probably be fine, I think I'd worry too much while she were gone if it were me... Just my :twocents: ...
 

R&J'sMom

New member
I couldn't do it either. That's just a lot of time in the car, on a weekend notorious for drunk drivers on the roads. I would take the floating holiday and not take the risk that something could happen.
 

Loves2sing

New member
I think at this stage it would be healthy for both of you to have a weekend apart. It will give you and Dh some much deserved alone time, and maybe you can even go on a date! If you are sure that Auntie and Uncle will be as safe as possible with her, I wouldn't see a safety issue at all. If you were going on the trip, you wouldn't think twice about whether the trip was safe or not right? She would have a blast getting spoiled my her Auntie, and it would be a special bonding time for them. I used to go to my Aunt's house for the weekend every few months all by myself, and I loved every minute of it! She passed away at Christmas, and now more than ever I cherish those times. I know it will be so hard to be away from her for 3 days, it will seem like an eternity, but I know you can get through it. Of course you need to decide what you are most comfortable with. I have only spent one night away from Jenna so far, and that was because I was in the hospital. She was only 3 weeks old, and I cried the entire night. So I understand your desire to keep her close. Good luck in making the right decision.
 

mommy2jana

New member
You're right....I wouldn't think twice about taking her on the trip if I were going....so I think I will let her go with them. I know she will be in good hands. They are just as safety conscious as I am...so I feel comfortable with her riding with them. She has been begging to see her Aunt a lot lately....my sister and bil moved 2 hours away in November....we used to see them all the time. I know they will all love to spend that time together.

Thanks for everyone's opinions!!!!
 

Niea

New member
I wouldn't be concerned at all from a safety perspective, since it sounds like they know about carseat safety and all that.

But I, personally, would have a hard time being away from my DD that long. I work full-time so even at best, I only get to see her a few hours in the evening. I also travel on business occasionally (in fact I am right now) so I'm gone from her for days at a time. It's not that I can't be away from my DD, it's just that I get so little precious time with her I won't give it up unless absolutely necessary. So far, she's never been away from us on the weekends or evenings/nights because that's MY time.
 

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