Not gonna make it to 3

Mama Jo

New member
I got the RA55 for DS to use in his dad's car because the RN doesn't fit. I used it for the first time on Saturday, and I actually wanted to use it in my car first. In moving the seats around though, I realized something. The RN has compressed the seat of the car so far down that it appears to be angled past 45*. Even being braced against the driver's seat, it's still managed to drop. I can see the marks on the back of the driver's seat where the top of the RN used to sit compared to where it sits now, and it's dropped about 6"!!! I don't think I can use the RN rf in that seat anymore, and unfortunately, I can't switch him to the other side because DD needs to be on that side for school drop-off.

So I was actually planning on using the RA55 for awhile, since I can get it more upright. But DS HATES it. (And to be honest, after using the RN for so long, I don't really love it either.) He screams that he's stuck, that he can't move, and he pushes with all his strength against the seat because he feels too confined - all the while screaming and throwing a fit. There's a LOT less room in the RA55 than there is in the RN.

Today, I couldn't take it anymore. He was pulling at his straps, trying to push the button on the buckle and undo the chest clip, trying to get out of the seat, screaming, kicking, throwing his shoes at me over behind his head... so I pulled over, took him out of the seat, and flipped it around. Then he freaked out because he didn't want to sit that way either. I told him he either get in the seat the way it was or I was turning it back around. So he finally did.

So now I'm thinking, if he can't rf in the RN because it's too angled due to the seat compression; and if he can't rf in the RA55 because he's a psycho; why the do I have the RA55 anyway???? I can't return it - I've used it for 2 days. But it's completely stupid to have a convertible that I'm never going to use rf. And I'm not going to go around and around trying to find another convertible that he's going to be happy in and that I'm going to be happy with myself, and that dad will be willing to use also. So screw it. I think I'm throwing in the towel. I think I'm gonna sell the RA55, ff the RN in my car, and get a GN for dad's.

Unless someone has some brilliant idea for me that does NOT involve buying a bunch of different convertible seats just to see if he'll last longer than 2 days in them.... Like some magical tip on how to "puff" the seat back up so I can rf the RN again...
 
ADS

icnee

New member
The CA has alot more room then the RA55 and my DD's preferred the CA over the RN.

Why cant you return the RA55 if it dont work for you.

I would at least try to return it.


I know it is frustraiting but at his age some kids can be very strong willed and will push us to the limit just to see what they can get away with, so I wouldnt throw in the towel just yet he is still very young.
If you dont like the CA then I would try the MR but if he like sto hang is legs off the side the CA might work better.

((hugs))
 

Mama Jo

New member
will it fit in the center?

No center seat.

The CA has alot more room then the RA55 and my DD's preferred the CA over the RN.

Why cant you return the RA55 if it dont work for you.

I would at least try to return it.

I've used it, and I think it's totally wrong to return something like a carseat that's been used. I know people do it, but I still think it's wrong. I wouldn't want to purchase a seat that had been used and returned, so I would not expect someone purchasing a new seat would want to find my used one, either.


I know it is frustraiting but at his age some kids can be very strong willed and will push us to the limit just to see what they can get away with, so I wouldnt throw in the towel just yet he is still very young.
If you dont like the CA then I would try the MR but if he like sto hang is legs off the side the CA might work better.

((hugs))

He's beyond strong-willed. He's bordering on having aspie tendencies. There's no "breaking him"... we ran alot of errands over the weekend, and he had gotten to the point of throwing an all-out tantrum just knowing he was going to have to get in the car. And then kicking and thrashing and hitting and twisting and screaming while I was trying to buckle him. I remembered then that he used to do that with the BV I used to have, which was why I sold it and got the RN.

I think the MR would have the same results, but I did think about the CA this morning. I might consider that, although I have a moral opposition to purchasing anything made by Dorel, so I'm not sold on it yet.
 

eyeslkethesky5391

Senior Community Member
I've used it, and I think it's totally wrong to return something like a carseat that's been used. I know people do it, but I still think it's wrong. I wouldn't want to purchase a seat that had been used and returned, so I would not expect someone purchasing a new seat would want to find my used one, either.


I work in retail...we just damage something out send it back to the manufacture if its been used...you should not feel bad for returning something that you used. Its not like its a clothing item you've had for 5 months. Of course I work at kohls and we take back anything
 

PurpleLucy

New member
I've returned several seats before. As long as I used it less than a week and it is still in new condition, I have no problem returning it. Especially knowing that they do NOT resell the seat, they send it back to the manufacturer.
 

mommycat

Well-known member
I think that depends on the store? If you knew the store you bought it from had a policy of not reselling car seats after a return, I wouldn't worry too much over returning it, although I might feel bad for the waste of materials. Nothing wrong with reselling if you can get most of your $$ back, either.
 

henrietta

Well-known member
He's beyond strong-willed. He's bordering on having aspie tendencies. There's no "breaking him"... we ran alot of errands over the weekend, and he had gotten to the point of throwing an all-out tantrum just knowing he was going to have to get in the car. And then kicking and thrashing and hitting and twisting and screaming while I was trying to buckle him. I remembered then that he used to do that with the BV I used to have, which was why I sold it and got the RN.

My 5.5 yr old has Asperger's or high functioning autism. I know those types of melt downs well. At that age, he couldn't always verbalize what he was feeling very well (even about things that other 2.5-3 yr olds could easily explain). He still can't always get his point across about why/what/how something isn't working for him.

Personally, I would take him to the store and let him try seats out. Give him a few choices (that you can live with, maybe try them out in the car without him first and choose 3 that you can live with). If you are comfortable w/turning him, then I'd let there be ff'ing only seats on the list. If not, only allow him to check out convertibles and install it rearfacing.

The main reason we never bought a CA to keep ds1 rearfacing longer was b/c he HATES it. He can't stand the head wings so close to his head and the close set neck straps. He wouldn't even sit in it for 30 seconds, and he LOVES to check out new seats! LOL He made it to 3.5 in our Britax. My second son, 2.5 now, also hated it (and he doesn't have autism or any real sensory issues-just didn't like it). We've already turned him ff'ing b/c he's too tall for the seats we have now.

You've made it this far, which is great. I say, at this point, go w/what works for you and him. As much as I'm for rearfacing to 3 or 4 yrs old, I do know what it's like to have a child w/aspergers, etc. There are some things I've done that I didn't plan on, even safety wise, b/c of the issues that come w/that.

GL!

henrietta
 

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