Question Hypthetical WWYD

DaniChildcare

New member
Not sure this is the correct posting area, but had a question (especially for nannies or childcare professionals) but obviously would like answers all around.

I watch a lot of different kids, all ages and sizes.

Hypothetically what would you do in these scenarios.

Parents want to turn their child around at a year (or early in general). Would you just continue to put the child RF in your car, and maybe give them some information about ERF? Would you mention to them that you plan on keeping their child RF in your car? Ask them if it's ok? What would you say if they said they did NOT want their child to continue to RF in your vehicle. (remember it would be their child, not mine)

Parents want to keep their child RF as long as possible, but the car seat they provided isn't a possibility/fit in your car. None of my own seats accommodate child RF, and child is 3+ and 30lbs+. How would you approach asking if child can FF in your car? I know many parents have horror stories of caregivers turning their child around without permission, or having seats installed incorrectly, but i have also know nannies have horror stories of parents overreacting to just the question. Would you approach the parents and ask if it were ok, (and lay out the reasons why - which obviously they would know if the seats weren't fitting in your vehicle) and if the answer is no, should i proceed to ask they provide a seat that fits my vehicle RF which i would return to them when the job ends/kid outgrows it/etc?

Neither of these scenarios have i had to deal with, but i have seen them happen with other people and would like some insight should they ever become a reality. Parents and caregivers perspectives on the scenarios would be helpful.
 
ADS

NannyMom

Well-known member
For the young child and ERF..... I would continue to RF the child in my car. I would mention the safety of RF to the parents, and see if they wanted more info. If they did NOT want the child RF in my car, I would not drive the child.

For the 3 year old..... As the nanny, I would tell the parents the problem of the seat not fitting and see if they wanted the child to ride FF or if they wanted to buy another seat. As a parent, I would be peeved if a nanny turned my child forward facing without my approval. My daughter rode RF until she was 4, and even a bit beyond. As the parent, I would have gladly bought nanny a new seat to keep her RF (but I know not all parents agree, I'm just saying it should be the parents choice here).
 

carseatcoach

Carseat Crankypants
I would not want to turn a child early. However, in general, I would expect a childcare provider to follow my clearly stated instructions. If she did not feel she could do that with a clear conscience, I'd want to know so I could find someone who could do so and feel okay about it (written sincerely, not snarkily, and as a general philosophical statement).

I would also expect in many cases to provide necessary equipment for carrying out my clearly stated instructions, so if that meant buying a Radian for ccp's car, then I would.
 

DaniChildcare

New member
No, i know what you're saying, but there have been occasion where i have seen parents asked if it was ok to turn their child around in the childcare providers car (child was 3+) and the parents did react badly to the question. I would never turn a child without parent permission, but at the same time, i realize that seats don't accommodate every child or every car. (not as a RF example, but i cannot get a Regent in my car at all)

That said, i own several seats of my own, and i do what the parents wishes for their children to the best of my ability. My question is more how you would approach a situation like that? I know most here would not be opposed to purchasing a seat for CCP's car, but not every parent can or will.

Again hypothetical situation entirely, as these have never come up, and i hope they never do, but there have been times where it is close. I had a 3 yo RF in my classic MA that was nearing the limit RF. His parents had a "bigger seat" in their larger car but decided to flip him at that time due to their need to use his current seat for their younger child, so i never did have to ask to flip him or ask for a different seat, but it was getting to that point.
 

urchin_grey

New member
If a parent refused to allow their small toddler to RF in my vehicle, then I just wouldn't work for them. Yes, its their child, but its also my vehicle, and as the driver, I'm responsible for what happens to that child. I mean, I probably wouldn't insist on RF a 3-4yo but I would not be comfortable with a FF 1yo in my vehicle. Or, you could just buy all Cosco seats so it would technically be illegal to FF before 34". :p My average sized nephew didn't make it to 34" until 2+.

As for the second scenario, I would just let the parents know the child had outgrown the seat and unless they could provide a different seat with higher limits, I would have to FF the child. Really nothing else you can do at that point.
 

NannyMom

Well-known member
Some examples.....

Parents gave you a Scenera (RF 35) and you have a 2 year old that weighs 36 pounds. Parents don't care which way kiddo rides with you, but is FF with them. I see that as your job to provide a seat with a higher RF limit if you want the child RF. Of course, as long as the parents are fine with that. If you can't buy a seat to accommodate, than you should FF the child, not demand another seat.

Parents give you a Radian (RF 45) and it doesn't fit RF in your car. Parents want 36 pound 2yr RF in your car. It's your job to explain to the parents that the seat doesn't install safely RF. Do they want child FF, or do they want to provide another seat?

You took a job, agreeing to provide a carseat for the child. Parents don't care RF or FF. 34pound 2yr is beyond the limits of your 33RF Marathon. You have 2 choices. Either turn child FF, or buy another seat with higher RF weight limit.

Parents provide you with a Comforsport for the 23 pound 15 month old. They want 15mo FF. You have 2 choices. Either FF the child, or tell the parents you're not comfortable driving the child FF for safety reasons (and briefly explain). Personally, I would refuse to drive the child.

Parents provide you with a Nautilus for their 30pound 2yr. You ask if you can RF the child, and they say yes. It's now up to you to provide an appropriate seat. If parents say no, you can either go with child FF, or refuse to drive the child.

Are you a daycare provider? As in different parents leave 5 (for example) kids in your care, at your home all day, every day? Or are you a nanny working full time for 1 family (or part time for several)? Or are you providing part time or sporadic childcare for many families? If you are a day care provider, you can write transportation rules into your contract (I know at least 1 person here does that). As a nanny, parents always know I follow best practice in my vehicle (but, I'm also a CPST). Providing sporadic care..... eh..... people know if I'm going to drive their children, I'm going to do it in a way that I see as safest or I won't drive them. But again, I'm a CPST.

My daughter's friend was 3yrs and FF since 1yr. With me, he rode FF until 4yrs. I have a friend with a (just turned) 6 year old in a backless booster for a year. With me, she rides in a high back booster (actually just requested to be harnessed). I was taking a neighbor's 10 year old to the pool with us. I checked his 5 step test before we went, and had a backless booster ready incase he didn't pass. I'm sure he's been boosterless with his mom since 6 or 8 (state law at the time).

On the flip side.... If I had a child care provider refusing to RF my daughter with a seat I provided and fit her car (say provider thinks it's unsafe to ERF), she'd be gone :whistle:
 

DaniChildcare

New member
I'm nanny that works part time for several families, so age, and direction of the kiddos depends on the day.

Your Radian seat example is the situation i was looking for! :) you described it much better than i did.

I eventually plan to run my own daycare, where i will lay out transportation guidelines, and the parents signs a contract, but i am a nanny currently. (when i have a van and daycare, i want a bunch of SmartSeats!) I wouldn't take a job where i the family and i weren't on the same terms when it comes to safety, but my personal vehicle is on the small side, so i doubt getting a RF Radian80 in there would happen. Personally i do have my own seats, should a parent not provide one, or theirs doesn't fit in my car, or whatever, but that one what if, always pops into my head. I currently need a seat with a higher RF limit (my classic MA is the highest i currently own) so the scenario comes down to what you described with the Radian. 35lb 3.5yo is ERF. Parents have bought a Radian80 and it doesn't fit RF, my MA won't accommodate him, so it's either sit FF or ask parents to buy another seat. That is something i hate, asking for parents to purchase yet another seat for my vehicle, so wanted to check and see what others would do in that situation, would you feel comfortable asking for another seat, and the general consensus so far is yes you would.
 

Aurezalia

Well-known member
What do you drive? My teeny-tiny Elantra can fit RF'ing RN's in it no problem. There's just a couple of tricks to it. ;)

To answer your question, I know specifically that if a family was asking me to transport a 1yo FF'ing and put up a big stink about not RF'ing, I would refuse to transport that child at all - and make it clear to the family that not being able to transport the child may very well mean moving onto another position.
As far as a seat that wouldn't fit in the vehicle, I'd make an effort to research and advise the parents on what won't fit in my vehicle before they buy so we don't have to worry about incompatibilities. (Actually, I use my own seats for this reason. ;) ) If it doesn't fit, it doesn't fit, there's nothing you can do to change that. Then it's up to the parents to decide if they want to get another seat to continue RF'ing, or to flip the child. And if they freak out on you when you bring the situation to them - Uh, not sure I'd want to be working for them. :eek:
 

cdncasper

New member
In my vehicle I make the rules about carseats and for the kids I watch I let the parents know that I rear face until they no longer fit the seats I have (highest is 35lbs) and they forward face as long as possible (I have had 6 yr olds in harnessed seats) and they stay in boosters until they can prove they can sit proper and they pass the 5 step test. I provide my own seats and none of the parents of the children I watch are as big on carseat safety as I am.
 

DaniChildcare

New member
What do you drive? My teeny-tiny Elantra can fit RF'ing RN's in it no problem. There's just a couple of tricks to it. ;)

To answer your question, I know specifically that if a family was asking me to transport a 1yo FF'ing and put up a big stink about not RF'ing, I would refuse to transport that child at all - and make it clear to the family that not being able to transport the child may very well mean moving onto another position.
As far as a seat that wouldn't fit in the vehicle, I'd make an effort to research and advise the parents on what won't fit in my vehicle before they buy so we don't have to worry about incompatibilities. (Actually, I use my own seats for this reason. ;) ) If it doesn't fit, it doesn't fit, there's nothing you can do to change that. Then it's up to the parents to decide if they want to get another seat to continue RF'ing, or to flip the child. And if they freak out on you when you bring the situation to them - Uh, not sure I'd want to be working for them. :eek:

I have a Chevy Cobalt. I haven't tried a Radian in my car, it certainly might fit, but was just throwing out examples of a seat that may not fit (due to height)

I doubt any of my bosses (past or current) would freak out with the question (with the exception of one, but her kids were past carseat age!), but i have seen it happen with friends of mine (i don't know much about their bosses though)

was just throwing it out there as a WWYD should that situation ever come up! You guys are great, thanks for all the helpful replies :)
 

Aurezalia

Well-known member
I have a Chevy Cobalt. I haven't tried a Radian in my car, it certainly might fit, but was just throwing out examples of a seat that may not fit (due to height)

I doubt any of my bosses (past or current) would freak out with the question (with the exception of one, but her kids were past carseat age!), but i have seen it happen with friends of mine (i don't know much about their bosses though)

was just throwing it out there as a WWYD should that situation ever come up! You guys are great, thanks for all the helpful replies :)

Oh OK, your PP I thought you were saying you really were having that situation with a RN. Phew! :p
 

SignCuer

New member
I am a nanny to 2 kids and babysitter to way too many kids! :D

The 6 yr old is LBB in their van, he's HBB in my van.
The 11 yr old can ride up front with them, he is stuck back in the 2nd or third row with a lot of complaints.

I also have a rule and it's on the back of my passenger seat:

Under 3 yr old must be RF, after 3 yr old, their choice. I have a 4 yr old who wants to be RF everytime she rides in my car. Most kids from 3 to 4 wants to be RF anyway so it's easy!

Up to 6 year old must be harnessed. However I do booster train 5-6 years old kids if I feel they are ready.

After 6 year olds and maturity level they can be either booster kids or harnessed kids. I do have a quite number of kids who prefer to be harnessed over booster and one 5 year old who wants to be RF but she is over the limit in my RN65... (waiting for my RN80 :D)

Booster until 5 step test.. none of the kids I know are boostered after 8 years old.. EXCEPT in my van! You will be boostered period.

If parents complain, I will consider the age of the child plus the child's feelings... I do love nothing other than a 4 year old telling her parents she wants to RF in my van. (it has happened before and it shut the parents mouths up) but ultimately, the end decision will be mine or I'm outta there.
 

Carrie_R

Ambassador - CPS Technician
I call my job a "shared nanny," but in essence it's a hybrid between a f/t nanny (in the childrens' home) and daycare provider (where I also watch a few other children.) Prior to this it was in-home daycare, in my home.

My situation is a smidge tricky because I had been watching these kids for years before I found out about CPS. The parents learned when I did -- or rather, I shared with them as I learned -- and they are respectful of my decisions in my vehicle. I am very lucky in the sense that either a) I've known these parents for a very long time or b) I came to them very highly recommended, so we have a lot of respect for each other and they trust me implicitly. Generally, I am able to make the decisions and they know that I am making safe choices for their children. I am looking at moving on within the next year, and will not take a job without the family understanding my policies (below.)

In my vehicle, we follow best practice, balanced by the needs of the group. (My best practice - RF if the child can, harness until k age/maturity, booster until 5-step, HBB if at all possible. Balancing needs - 33lb 4y11m child FFs occasionally in a spot where I can't fit a RFer. She is FF in all other vehicles anyways.) I provide all of my own seats, for three reasons -- 1) I have some tricky three-acrosses, 2) I know the history of each and every seat, and 3) I do not feel it's fair to ask parents to replace seats every time I need (or choose) to upgrade.

Example: I had a RF 3-across in my third row: Radian, MR, Avenue. The child riding in the Radian was 44.8lbs. Logistically, I needed those three kids in the third row, but no FFing seat fit that I owned fit back there. I ended up needing to purchase one new seat (ProSport) -- almost needed two, but worked something out.

I had purchased the Radian just a year earlier, when the same child was 39.8lbs riding in a MR, just shy of three, and I decided I wanted to continue to RF him. I don't feel it would have been fair to ask parents to purchase *either* of those seats, but it was best for the group to pass his seats on down, and get him new seats. Nor would it have been fair to ask the other parents (MR child) to provide a new seat for their child, because my setup didn't work any more.

That's my plug for provider- vs. parent-provided seats.

If parents object to best practice, I would not transport. But if I can't transport, I don't provide care, and these parents want me providing care. (It would be different for a rare, occasional job; I'm talking about regular/ft care here.) If their child was having a true issue with the situation, I would imagine they would talk to me about it.

If the parent asked me to ERF and their seat didn't fit, I would discuss the situation with them. I'd offer to visit a tech to see if we could get it in with help -- or if I saw ample evidence here that it wouldn't fit, I'd offer that up. I would explain their options -- for a 36lb child, a different 40lb seat; for the 42lb child FF (or import, if you'd accept that option.) If none of those options worked, it's either don't transport, find a new provider, or provide you with a vehicle in which the child can RF.

HTH :)
 

ConnorsMommy

New member
As a nanny and a mom, I've learned alot about car seat safety in the last few years. When I first started out as a nanny, I was pretty clueless about how to use a car seat correctly. I don't have a regular job now, but do occasional care for several families. My personal rules for my car are RF to at least 2, but preferably longer if the family is okay with it; FF in a harnessed seat unless over the weight/height limit for the seats I have (minimum 4 and 40, but preferably 6 years old and mature enough to sit correctly). Children who are in a booster must use one until at least 8 years old (law for my state) AND can pass the 5-step test. I currently have a Frontier85, a Classic Marathon, and a Recaro SignoG2. All kids under 13 must be in the backseat. (I had a irritated 11 year old when I told him he had to sit in the back seat even though his parents let him ride in the front)
I will tell parents that I will RF their child until at least 2 years old, but after that, it's the parent's choice. If the parent wants the child to ERF past the limits of the seats I have, then I will talk to them about it and work something out, either to have them buy a higher limit seat for the child, or to use the seat I have FF.
I will only use parent provided seats if they are not expired, are in good condition, and are age appropriate for the child. One family I worked for last fall had a 8 year old Century seat that they wanted me to use as a hbb for their 5 year old. I had no problem with him using a hbb because he was very good about sitting correctly. I bought a Graco TB the first day I worked for them and the dad reimbursed me. Another family had a seat made in 1996 that they offered me to use for their 3 year old. He used my son's other seat. Another family had a newer Scenera that I had no problem using for their daughter since she still fit.
If a parent didn't want to allow me to ERF or EH, etc, I wouldn't want to transport their children. I would feel awful if a child in my care was hurt in an accident because I didn't do all I could to keep him safe. I also won't do anything with someone else' child that I wouldn't do with my own son.
 

babyherder

Well-known member
I'm a babysitter. The have my own car seats cause I feel better knowing the history of the seats and some parents take their kids out of seats too young or forget to leave the seats (plus I get the fun of choosing the seats!). I always get the parent's approval for how their child will ride in my car (rf, ff, harnessed, boostered). If they feel their child is unsafe then we'll talk about it. If they think I'm a weird overprotective neurotic freak they'll just have to deal with it. I just tell them I'm responsible for everything that happens to the kids in my car while I"m driving so I need to be comfortable with how they're restrained. I don't think I could live with myself if one of them got hurt and I hadn't done everything I could to keep them safe.
 

lpperry

Active member
I am a daycare provider. I give the parents my car information before they sign their child up for my daycare. I tell them that I rearface all of the children who are under 3 1/2 in my car as long as they are fit according to the carseats guidelines. I explain that, as a daycare provider, I go by best practice when I am transporting other people's children. I give them an extended rearfacing brochure as well. I do not ask. I just tell them that this is how it is in my car. Many of them chose to keep rearfacing their children after 12 months as well.

I require a $50 carseat rental fee. Then I provide my own carseats. I have to do this because only a certain combo will fit 3 across in the back of my van.

Noone has had a problem with the rental fee or the fact that their child was rear facing.

I have seats that rearface to 35 and 40 pounds. If a child outgrew one of those and the parents still wanted their child rearfacing, I would not purchase a new seat for that child. However, if the parent wanted to purchase a radian for their child to use, I would definitely allow that. I know a radian would fit in my 3 across situation. If there was another seat that would accommodate the child and would fit 3 across, I would allow that as well. The seat would have to be left at my house though because when we go places I install in advance.
 

Angela

New member
I have all my parents sign a 'contract' saying that it's okay for me to transport their child and my rules for the car (How long rf, when to booster, etc). If they don't agree with my rules, the child can't go with me. I think the main thing is to get to know your parents and be completely honest with them. If the seat doesn't fit your car, let them know and ask what they'd rather do. If they want you to ff their 1 year old, I would say I can't transport them.
 

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