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Thread: neighbor

  1. #1
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    neighbor

    After reading here I'm now concerned about my neighbor. Her son is the same age as my son and he will be 3 in a few weeks. She saw my husband installing my daughters new marathon the other day & was saying that she is going to put her son in a booster because he is running out of room in his carseat..now, I know he has to be at least 40 lbs. and 4 yrs. old to be in a booster..right? He can't weigh too much more than my son..my son is 34 lbs. I just don't know if I should say anything?? Plus...he's not even 3 yrs. old yet.

    Lisa

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  3. #2
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    Re: neighbor

    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa View Post
    After reading here I'm now concerned about my neighbor. Her son is the same age as my son and he will be 3 in a few weeks. She saw my husband installing my daughters new marathon the other day & was saying that she is going to put her son in a booster because he is running out of room in his carseat..now, I know he has to be at least 40 lbs. and 4 yrs. old to be in a booster..right? He can't weigh too much more than my son..my son is 34 lbs. I just don't know if I should say anything?? Plus...he's not even 3 yrs. old yet.

    Lisa
    I know the graco turbo booster is rated for 30-100lbs.

    I don't know if I'd say anything, depends on your relationship. My next door neighbor has a girl my dd's age, and we chit chat when the kids play, I would casually say something to her. But my neighbor diagonal with kids about my kids' ages I don't really ever talk to her, just a wave and a hey there so I wouldn't say anything to her.

    Good luck, it's a tough situation...

  4. #3
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    Re: neighbor

    If you have even a passing relationship with her I would say something.
    Maybe she is completely unaware? I assume you would want her to tell you?

    Maybe just give her the grand tour of your new seat, and casually slip in your advice/comments about her son (and then direct her to this website or another car seat safety site)

    I know I would want someone to correct me, I'd rather hurt my pride than hurt my child.

  5. #4
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    Re: neighbor

    Mention that you got the new marathon to keep your kiddo in a harness longer because you found out the recommended minimum for booster use is 4 yrs old and 40 lbs.

  6. #5
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    A three year old is not ready for a booster- mentally they are not capable of sitting in it correctly. I don't care how big they are. My 7 yr old is still in a 5 point harness and will be till 8 yrs at least.

  7. #6
    Carseat Crankypants carseatcoach's Avatar
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    Re: neighbor

    A 3yo should not be in a booster; however, if she is 3yo and >30#, it IS legal in most states for her to be in most highbacked boosters, so please be careful not to give her misinformation or you will lose any credibility you might have.

    I'm NOT okay with a 3yo in a booster, but I also don't know if that's a battle I'd pick. People generally don't appreciate unsolicited parenting advice.
    CPST and Mama to a 13yo girl, 5-stepped at age 10 and 5'

    Posted from my toaster using a PopTart

  8. #7
    CPS Technician luckyclov's Avatar
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    Re: neighbor

    People generally don't appreciate unsolicited parenting advice.
    Ain't that the truth.
    CPST & Mom to:
    Keep (11 yrs old, 57", 80 lbs), in an Olli, Ozzi & BB
    Sass (10 yrs old, 54", 76 lbs), in Santa Fe, Monterey & Olli
    Zilla (4 yrs old, 38", 36 lbs), FF in a PS, RXT & FR85
    Rollin' in a 2014 Ody, 2012 F-150 SuperCrew & Luigi, a peppy little 2012 Fiat 500

  9. #8
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    Re: neighbor

    Maybe you could mention how fidgety your own child is so you did a lot of research on what car seat to get since he/she wouldn't be ready for a booster for a while yet. Then mention some of the other options. I'd start with the Maestro and that it's a "great seat" and it only costs "$80" Then mention the Nautilus but most people are more likely to go with the Maestro (at least around here).
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Caleb 11 yrs. 70lbs. 55" 5-steps Megan 8.5 yrs. 45lbs. 48" Harmony Literider
    Grace 6 yrs. 40lbs. 42" Nautilus
    Cameron 4 yrs. 34lb. 39" Radian XTSL
    Sally born 4/28 SR35, Zach born 4/28 Combi Coccoro

  10. #9
    CPS Technician icnee's Avatar
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    Re: neighbor

    I am not at all ok with a 3yo in a booster either not only are unable sit properly the bones have not ossified enough to keep them from sliding under the lap belt.

    I would cassually speak to her you can let her know you found it when looking for a new seat , you can tell her that you dont mean to be rude ior hurt any ones feeling but if the hand was truned you know you would want to know so you want to share with her. Of course you dont have to say those exact words but hoping that give you some ideas tohelp you.


    If you really cant convince her that he needs a bigger harness seat (she may just not know that there are bigger ones) Then onlt as a last resort I would stear her to the Park Pay Slide Gaurd so hopfully he dont slid under the lap belt, but I am pretty sure there is a 40lbs minimum on that one hopefully some one els chimes in and clarifies that.
    Last edited by icnee; 01-24-2011 at 12:07 PM. Reason: spelled Park Way wrong.
    Isaiah 11yrs 5'4" 144# passes the 5 step test Cadence 8yrs 47# btb Naveah 6yrs 50# btb Emma 5yrs 41# RF diono 120 & booster Elijah 3YRS 38lbs RF diono 120
    Auto correct gone wild.

  11. #10
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    Re: neighbor

    Thanks...next time I see her I think I may just casually bring it up and see how the conversation goes. The funny thing is that when she was talking to my dh, she was saying that now it's recommended that children stay rear facing for at least 2 yrs...so, it just seems odd that she would put her 3 year old in a booster. I am in NY and I checked the law..you have to be 40 lbs. and preferably 4 yrs. old to be in a booster (a 40 lb. 3 yr old can also be in a booster). I really don't think he is 40 lbs. yet..him and my son are the same age and have always been around the same weight. We are friends I guess...sort of friends. We have play dates every once in a while. Honestly I really don't think that she knows how much her son weighs. Well..he'll be 3 soon and I know he'll be weighed at his 3 yr. check up. (she once admitted to me that she does not own a scale).

    Lisa

  12. #11
    Senior Community Member lovemybabybug's Avatar
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    Re: neighbor

    I have a simlilar situation.

    My SIL put her foster kid/ niece in a high back booster at 2 and half, and now at 3 years old she removed the back. I am positive she isn't 40 pounds. When I said something to her, she told me (you might wanna sit for this) "After they are 3 years old it doesn't matter if they are in car seat or not, a car seat won't make any difference in a crash". I just about had a heart attack. Her son is now 11 and the other foster kid/ nephew is 9. I have known them for almost 5 years and they have never been on a booster. She also has a 3 month old, she puts the baby in the seat with a snow bunting on, and she never tightens the straps. One day I was putting the baby in the seat, I adjusted the chest clip and started tightening it, she told me to stop, that she had enough clothes on, it didn't need to be tight. Needles to say she isn't allowed to drive my DD unless I am with them. now we are supposed to take a road trip together. There are 7 of us, but only 6 seat belts in the car. So I told her we wouldn't be able to travel together and she said: "yes we will, the boys ( 11 and 9) can just share a seat belt"

  13. #12
    CPS Technician NannyMom's Avatar
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    Re: neighbor

    Quote Originally Posted by PollyWall View Post
    I have a simlilar situation.

    My SIL put her foster kid/ niece in a high back booster at 2 and half, and now at 3 years old she removed the back. I am positive she isn't 40 pounds. When I said something to her, she told me (you might wanna sit for this) "After they are 3 years old it doesn't matter if they are in car seat or not, a car seat won't make any difference in a crash". I just about had a heart attack. Her son is now 11 and the other foster kid/ nephew is 9. I have known them for almost 5 years and they have never been on a booster. She also has a 3 month old, she puts the baby in the seat with a snow bunting on, and she never tightens the straps. One day I was putting the baby in the seat, I adjusted the chest clip and started tightening it, she told me to stop, that she had enough clothes on, it didn't need to be tight. Needles to say she isn't allowed to drive my DD unless I am with them. now we are supposed to take a road trip together. There are 7 of us, but only 6 seat belts in the car. So I told her we wouldn't be able to travel together and she said: "yes we will, the boys ( 11 and 9) can just share a seat belt"
    She must have been reading freakenomics.
    Mama to Sofi: 7.1 yrs, 46Lbs (47"), Boostered in a Turbo, Vivo, Monterey, Cybex; harnessed in Nautilus
    Nanny to BabyD, 21 months in a RXT, Classic Marathon, Boulevard 70

  14. #13
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    Re: neighbor

    Quote Originally Posted by Lisa View Post
    Thanks...next time I see her I think I may just casually bring it up and see how the conversation goes.
    That sounds like a great plan! I understand what a difficult situation this is. Since you just bought a new seat for your child who is the same age/approx. size, that seems like a great opportunity to talk about it and what you've learned. You could present it as, I recently learned x, y, and z and previously didn't know all of this .. wow there is a lot to learn on this topic. Maybe something like that? Good luck! Good for you for caring! I hope it works out!

  15. #14
    CPS Technician christineka's Avatar
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    Re: neighbor

    Some people call combination seats "boosters". Perhaps (looking on the optimistic side) she meant she was going to put her kid in a combo seat?
    Christine *mom* to

    Dd1 age 17 (seatbelt), Dd2 age 15 (seatbelt), Ds1 age 14 (seatbelt), Dd4 age 12 (Seatbelt), Ds2 age 10 (Probooster), Dd4 age 7 (rstv), and dd5 age 1 (rfing Pria)

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