Booster training an older kid

My oldest two girls have been fine in boosters since they were 4.75 and 5 years old. I've had to remind them a few times to sit up, but that was it. My ds went to a booster at 4.5 years due to weight, but went back to a harness at 5 years. When he was 6 I sold his harnessed seat and bought a booster. He was horrible in the booster (a vivo and bodyguard), plus we had buckling issues, so I put him back in the harness. Then at 7 I sold his harnessed seat (again) and gave him his booster back. He was still not very good in the booster. I finally gave him a harnessed seat again. Then I decided to be charitable, took away the harnessed seat and put in the bodyguard booster because it has lap-belt locks. He still will bend over and sideways. My ds will be 8 in a few months. He should be able to sit in a booster! Is there some method to teach him to sit properly? I've told him many times that he needs to sit up, in the booster, behind the seatbelt, but he still sees that he can move about, so he does. Locking the seatbelt doesn't work because he will move out from under it sideways, then not be able to squeeze back under because the belt will reel back in while he's not under it. Should I just give up on boostering him and harness till he's quite a bit older? He's fine with being harnessed, but I read so much about the theory that a booster is safer, though it is only safer if the child will stay in place.

For a developmentally typical 8yo, sitting still in a booster is a disciplinary issue, IMO.

There is no evidence that either a harness or a booster is safer when properly used. For an 8yo, just as for a 4yo, proper use includes maintaining a safe seating position.

How about rewarding him for days he sits well? Is he a figity kid? Maybe a video game to play in the car to keep him occupied or maybe he can earn tickets to cash in at the end of the week for a trip to a movie or game or something?

Is he comfortable? It is so hard when it is something like this that is about safety because you just can not let it go. hope you find a good solution.

chickabiddy said:

For a developmentally typical 8yo, sitting still in a booster is a disciplinary issue, IMO.

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How do you discipline a child into sitting properly at all times in the vehicle? Tangible rewards are out. (It's not fair to those who never had to be bribed to sit properly.) I can't pull over to the side of the road every time. In fact, if I'm driving I can't even see this child. When I am not driving (such as yesterday) I tell ds to stay sitting up and in place, but then I have to turn around to see that he's in place, which puts me out of place and that's setting a poor example.

I don't think you can. I think there is probably a reason he is not sitting right and if he is a good kid in other areas there must be something about this that bugs him. Does he ever say anything about it?

Have you asked him why he won't stay seated correctly? Does he want to be in a harnessed seat? DD#3 wasn't able to sit in a booster until just a couple months ago (she'll be 7 in April). She wanted to be in a booster, but I told her until she could stay sitting correctly she had to be harnessed. Since she was not happy about having to be harnessed and WANTED a booster, I knew it wasn't a discipline issue..it was a developmental issue. She asked to try again in October and I said okay, but reminded her I could always put her back in the harnessed seat. She's done great since then! I agree that it may be a discipline issue...but then again it could still be a developmental one. I'd talk to him and see what he says/wants. If he's wanting to be in a harnessed seat, then he could be wiggling on purpose knowing you'll put him back in one. If that's the case, and you want him to stay in the booster, its a discipline issue and you need to figure out a way to correct it. Or if you have a harnessed seat/can afford another harnessed seat for him and want to keep him harnessed, that would be okay too.

can you move the kids around so he is where you can easily see him?

Also, an 8yr old should be able to understand WHY he's supposed to sit still and not need the reminder.

Has he given you any reasons for why he keeps leaning out of the seatbelt and bending??

Yesterday he kept dropping stuff, so he had to lean over to pick it up. He still dropped stuff while harnessed, but was creative with his feet to retrieve fallen objects. I don't know why he leans sideways out of the booster. I think he gets some of his attitude from dh. We have never been in an accident. Why the need to be so strict? Ds has leaned out of place lots of times and nothing bad has ever happened. You and I know that it could, but ds hasn't seen it ever happen.

Ds used to want to be in a booster, but now he'd rather be in a harness than in the bodyguard. He hates the belt lockoffs.

They make it tough don't they? My Ds is the same way. He likes the harness better. My son will lean here and there too sometimes but as long as he moves right back, I don't say anything. Only if he is leaning longer do I say anything. I don't want it to become something that makes him nuts or anxious.

I think it is about finding that right balance for your child. Each one is so different.