Just a mini-vent... to someone who will be maybe kinda sorta get it.

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nmb

New member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #1

'cause no-one IRL will.
Friends Christmas party on Saturday, they decided to have a hay-ride for the kids. In the back of the pick-up truck. (They've done hay-rides at parties before in a trailor behind the lawn mower, around the yard, quite a different thing IMO). So I was kinda ok w/ them being in the truck, thinking they would just drive around the yard again...til they headed down the road. Um, no, not ok at all. My DH was in the back of the truck too so I called him (cell phones) while trying to flag down the truck - and when they stopped took DS out of it and we walked back to the house (they were only one house over).
And got called a "baby", not once, but several times, by the lady who's been my best friend since the kids were infants... And several others there made comments about "you can tell it's your first" and similiar. 'cause you know, they're going slow, and since a couple Dad's were in the back too, it's safe. Never mind the guy up the road who's drunk 'cause its Saturday night, or the one who's on his phone or just checking out the kids & Christmas lights on the truck he's passing and crosses over the line...
And yeah, I'm still pissed about it a couple days later. Not worth being angry over I know, but really...I'm not criticizing you for your choices, why do I need to be a "baby" for wanting my kid reasonably safe... and why can't you keep all your other snarky comments to yourself...
That's all. Thanks for 'listening'

 

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carseatfreak

New member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #2

{{{{HUGS}}}}}

I have felt your pain. We have relatives with a gator-type vehicle (different brand) and they haul down the road all the time with their kids in the back in the trailer or in the lapbelts that it provides. I can't imagine. I've got slack for it before for not letting oldest dd participate in some of that stuff (and for not letting my dd ride on the back of their four-wheelers with one of their crazy friends who drives TOO fast with the kids on). Don't let yourself get beat up over it. If something, God forbid, would have happened you and every other person would be devastated because of it. You stood up for the safety of your child and I think that is commendable (when as an adult we still get pressure to do otherwise). Sounds like your friend needs to understand you will make the choices you feel are right for your child.

 

Louisa

CPST Instructor

• Dec 20, 2010

• #3

oh my i would be livid if anyone drove my child on a public road like that. I'm sorry that happened to you and i'm sorry some of your friends are being jerks.

 

lovinwaves

New member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #4

Yeah, sweety, I'm sorry that happened. They just have the mentality of, "we are having fun! What could possibly happen! We aren't going very fast...." ((((HUGS))))) that really sucks they called you names. How mature

 

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Kris0722

New member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #5

I would have taken my child off that truck too! No WAY is that safe at all! How offensive that your friends call you names for being the only non-bonehead in the room!

 

monica-m

CPST Instructor

• Dec 20, 2010

• #6

I would have done the same thing you did. In my state, it is illegal for children to be in the back of a truck on public roads. Your reasoning was sound and it is sad that the others didn't have the same concerns for their children's safety.

 

jourdysmom

CPST Instructor

• Dec 20, 2010

• #7

I would have been LIVID... and would have left and DH could have hitch-hiked home!

I am pretty sure it is illegal here too!

 

mish

New member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #8

You definitely did the right thing! I would have been furious. I get nervous enough with a hay ride on a trailer going really slow in the yard. I don't like my kids doing it but have been overruled by dh. I would absolutely not le them ride in the back of a truck down the road.

And I'm sorry people were mean to you about it. You know what? People suck.

 

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gigi

New member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #9

I would have been very upset that adults were belittling my son right in front of him. If they have a problem with your parenting, they should address it to you outside of his earshot, but belittling a child? NOT OKAY!

Most people wouldn't think twice about that hay ride, so I don't think I'd be livid about that (although I would have pulled my son off of it in a hot second). But I would be really, really angry that my "friend" had shamed my son!

 

canadiangie

New member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #10

I love it when ppl pull the "it must be your first" BS when you're just trying to make the safest/healthiest choice you can on behalf of your kid who is RELYING on you to make the best choice.

You absolutely did the right thing. (((hugs))) mama and good for you!!

 

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babyherder

Well-known member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #11

No way would any kid I'm responsible for be on that hayride. Hope your friends get tired of making fun of your parenting decisions soon.

 

Baylor

New member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #12

I would have lost my mind.. I agree 100% with you. I am so amazed that when mothers try to be as safe as possible with their babies they are picked on more so than the ones that not seem to care about safety at all.

It just takes once.. that is it. i am so sorry they were so awful to you. I have 3. I am as protective over the last as the third.

 

littleangelfire

Well-known member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #13

Hm. So it's just your firsst, you might be ok with subsequent children being thrown from a pickup truck?

How stupid. And as someone else pointed out, incredibly immature and disrespectful to actually call you names for it. My guess? They felt comfortable doing so b/c they weren't alone, they ganged up together.

 

autumnlily

New member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #14

I wish we could have been there to defend your fantastic decision in person. I can envision the c-s.org gang marching up to them with our computers, videos, and d-rings...

 

Babywearing Meghan

New member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #15

canadiangie said:

I love it when ppl pull the "it must be your first" BS when you're just trying to make the safest/healthiest choice you can on behalf of your kid who is RELYING on you to make the best choice.

You absolutely did the right thing. (((hugs))) mama and good for you!!

Click to expand...

I know right, like the fact that they don't seem to know any better would make me think that their kids are their firsts.

I would have been furious too!

 

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cat mommy

New member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #16

In my community, a woman went to prison when one of the kids in the back of her pickup truck was killed. It was back roads and not a high speed accident.

IMO, I would have called 911 without a second thought.

Their behavior was reprehensible, in many ,many ways.

Hugs.

 

mrs_teeee67

New member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #17

A HORRIFIC tragedy happened near where I grew up with a hayride, trailer, tractor being driven VERY slow by a dad. Public road, BAD BAD idea! Glad you did what you needed to do and boo hiss on the jerks. How DARE anyone be mean to my child because of MY decision

 

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nmb

New member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #18

Thank you, and sending a big hug, to everyone that replied!
Just to be clear, noone was mean to the kid, comments were directed at me. I guess I wouldn't have cared much if just some random person that was there wanted to say something, just angry (er) because it was a friend that started it, and that once wasn't enough, it had to keep being repeated through the night. If someone would've been teasing my son they probably would've got socked. Ok, maybe not, but I'd sure have thought about it.
I think it may be illegal here too but I don't really know; but that doesn't really matter IMO, (at least in this instance), just the possibility of something going really wrong and leaving me w/out a kid, or with him really hurt ... when it's too easy to stay in the yard and he's having plenty of fun w/out the 'hayride'.

 

Minnesota

CPST Instructor

• Dec 20, 2010

• #19

You did not over-react. You saw an unsafe situation and chose to remove YOUR OWN child from it. You didn't demand that everyone get out or scream at them for their stupidity, you simply made a choice as a parent to remove your child. I would do the same.

People who made fun of you were probably feeling a bit defensive when they looked at the situation in a new light and realized that yes, indeed, it was a stupid thing to do.

 

ntrenary

Active member

• Dec 20, 2010

• #20

People loose their minds when they're having fun. A few years ago we had a big snow storm. The next morning I look out my window and see a truck drive by pulling a couple kids on a sled attached to the bumper! I couldn't believe it! It drove by at least 3 times. I told my DH I was going to call the police. He thought I was over reacting.