WHY??

Lys · Apr 18, 2007

It's exactly 3 days before PROM, I just called this AM to make an appotintment for DD's hair and makeup ($75) and an hour after that I get a call from school that she is SUSPENDED( for cutting class) from school for 3 days and will not be able to go to the prom!!
UGH! And her dress was $175!
WWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY????

JaRylan · Apr 18, 2007

Oh no! Sorry to hear that.

southpawboston · Apr 18, 2007

can't you fight it? that's pretty harsh of them to enforce the suspension on prom night.

skaterbabs · Apr 18, 2007

I would fight it if this is the first you've heard of the cutting.

broken4u05 · Apr 18, 2007

I would fight it if it has never happened before. If it is something that is common for her i dont think you are going to have any luck. And if she already has a ticket i know they did not look at a list of names of people that could not go they just looked to see if you had a ticket but her school my be different

Lys · Apr 18, 2007

It's in school suspension.
Missing Prom was my punishment. She was already on restriction/grounded for her grades. This was the last straw.
I am just so disappointed in her right now. To do something that stupid so close to Prom. She's a Junior, so she will be able to go next year. Hopefully!
And this isn't the first time she been caught cutting class. I've caught her before. It's just the first time the school has caught her.

Splash · Apr 18, 2007

I'm shocked at how many people say they don't think she deserves to miss prom. She absolutely does! It's a school event, and a privilege that she did not earn. If she doesn't want to go to school, she should not be allowed to attend school events. It might suck, but she deserves to miss prom. She chose to skip school, she pays the consequences.
I know that this is a parent induced punishment, but I'd back it completely if it were a school punishment as well. I've spent too many years of parents bailing their kids out of each and every scrape because it's "not fair" or "too harsh" or "special occasion." She's suspended from school during the time of the prom, she should be suspended from prom. Would you guys "fight it" if she goofed off and failed a class? Because in all the schools I've ever been in, you had to have a certain GPA to attend any school event, prom included. So would it be fair to fight the school to let an athlete play in the final game after he cheated and failed a test?
Good going, Lysandra. I would have done the same thing, especially since she's not a senior. (I might not have done it if she were a senior and it were my choice, but I certainly would not fight the school if it were the school's decision). I'm sick of parents who blame the teacher because the kid bit his grandmother.

TheRealMacGyver · Apr 18, 2007

Amen to what Splash said. I absolutely agree, kids have to be held accountable too. I am sad this has happened to you lodonal65, as this is probably more painful for you than it is your daughter, aside from the financial burden. I think the punishment fits the crime, the only thing I might add is for her to work off the monetary value of what you put out for this prom. We learn from our mistakes or we don't learn at all.

Patriot201 · Apr 18, 2007

Splash said:
I'm shocked at how many people say they don't think she deserves to miss prom. She absolutely does! It's a school event, and a privilege that she did not earn. If she doesn't want to go to school, she should not be allowed to attend school events. It might suck, but she deserves to miss prom. She chose to skip school, she pays the consequences.
I know that this is a parent induced punishment, but I'd back it completely if it were a school punishment as well. I've spent too many years of parents bailing their kids out of each and every scrape because it's "not fair" or "too harsh" or "special occasion." She's suspended from school during the time of the prom, she should be suspended from prom. Would you guys "fight it" if she goofed off and failed a class? Because in all the schools I've ever been in, you had to have a certain GPA to attend any school event, prom included. So would it be fair to fight the school to let an athlete play in the final game after he cheated and failed a test?
Good going, Lysandra. I would have done the same thing, especially since she's not a senior. (I might not have done it if she were a senior and it were my choice, but I certainly would not fight the school if it were the school's decision). I'm sick of parents who blame the teacher because the kid bit his grandmother.

:yeahthat:

Perhaps it is the teacher in me, but I agree with Splash. There needs to be a serious consequence. Cutting class is a big deal. Sure, it stinks that she will miss prom, but it was her decision to cut class.

rlsadc · Apr 18, 2007

I agree, the punishment should stand. Especially since she has been in trouble in other areas. I realise that prom is the biggest thing in the world to a senior in high school, but in the bigger scheme of things, its not. And in reality, she will have to deal with much harsher consequences for inappropriate actions..

Starlight · Apr 18, 2007

Sometimes, teenagers do stupid stuff.

Is this something thats been going on for awhile, or only since your dh left?

I do agree that she should miss it... and I think I'd make her work off the dress, assuming its not returnable. Same goes for anything else that was already purchased/paid for the prom (like the tickets.) I am an evil mom. I'd pay minimum wage... for evil jobs, like toilet and bathroom floor scrubbing with a toothbrush. I get that from my Mom, I think.

Dh has a little bit of an evil side as well.... he says that it would just as evil, if not more evil, to make her wear this years dress next year. LOL I don't know that I agree with it being worse, but that could work too.

skaterbabs · Apr 18, 2007

I've had too many times when the school wanted to enforce a severe punishment without having notified the parent that there was a problem. Since that's not the case here, it should definately stand.

AND she should have to pay back the money spent on tickets, clothing, ect.

But I'm mean like that.

Lys · Apr 18, 2007

starlight said:
Sometimes, teenagers do stupid stuff.

Is this something thats been going on for awhile, or only since your dh left?

I do agree that she should miss it... and I think I'd make her work off the dress, assuming its not returnable. Same goes for anything else that was already purchased/paid for the prom (like the tickets.) I am an evil mom. I'd pay minimum wage... for evil jobs, like toilet and bathroom floor scrubbing with a toothbrush. I get that from my Mom, I think.

Dh has a little bit of an evil side as well.... he says that it would just as evil, if not more evil, to make her wear this years dress next year. LOL I don't know that I agree with it being worse, but that could work too.

She has done this off and on with or without him being gone.
In fact, I just told her last night that her maturity had grown recently since she broke up with a no so good BF.
guess I spoke too soon.

ThreeBeans · Apr 18, 2007

Oh, man. I feel sorry for her, even if she did make a mistake

MagnificentMama · Apr 18, 2007

ThreeBeans said:
Oh, man. I feel sorry for her, even if she did make a mistake

I'm sure she won't make the same mistake again before her senior prom

I think the punishment was extremely appropriate for being a "repeat" ditcher!

ThreeBeans · Apr 18, 2007

MissMommy928 said:
I'm sure she won't make the same mistake again before her senior prom

I bet not

Still, I was a ditcher, and I turned out ok

MagnificentMama · Apr 18, 2007

ThreeBeans said:
I bet not

Still, I was a ditcher, and I turned out ok

Ehh maybe i come from a different perspective, i NEVER went to ANY prom so maybe I just come from a different way of thinking. And trust me, since i was a little kid i wanted to go to prom. I had my dress and shoes and everything planned since I was like 5!! Poo happened and I got pregnant my sophmore year in high school and dropped out to go to college. I wish I would have been able to go, but live and learn I suppose. Punishment stinkies but they're enforced for a reason.

ThreeBeans · Apr 18, 2007

Awww, that makes me sad for you

Not that you got pregnant and went to college I mean...you just sound a little wistful

arly1983 · Apr 18, 2007

HA HA, I was a fellow ditcher, I skipped 4th Block 17 times in a semester. It was chemistry and guess what I failed it and had to retake it the next semester. The school never actually caught me. They are much stricter now.

It really isn't an unfair punishment and in the end it is going to hurt mom worse...

WHY??

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