Dr Visit

miles had a WBV yesterday , hes 18 months old , he talks but not the 25 words his pediatrician said he should..she told me that maybe i spend to much time worrying about what he eats and doesnt eat, fighting her about vaccinations and so on when i really need to worry about teaching him to talk..now im a VERY outspoken persona nd i can get down right mean when you mess with my cubs but i didnt i just said oh ok and moved along..he has 2 older siblings but she said he needs to be around other babies his age and i need to get him into play groups or something. I dont get along with the moms at kindermusik and sprouts because i dont shove cheetos down his throat every 5 minutes, they are *****y snotty ladies who once they found out he wasnt vaxxed they stop acknowledging him.
anyone have a babay who DIDNT say 25 words at 18 months?? oh miles was also born at 32wks so i do try to give him the benefit of that.
anyone wanna come socialize with my baby??? lol:thumbsup:

Is that 18 Months from when is was supposed to be born, or when he was born. From what I understand, you should really count months from the time he was supposed to be born, therefore, he is only 16 months. I don't think my now 29 month old said 25 words 18 months. Our Ped didn't really push the issue.

We would come socialize as all my DS has to play with is Girls

Michael didn't really start talking until he was about 2. At 18 months he said maybe 10 words that you could understand. He was an only child at the time. By the time he was 3 he was "normal". It was almost like he didn't have a lot to say so he didn't say a lot. Now he has a lot to say!!

Wow. I would find another ped. JMO.

My friend's 26mo that I babysit doesn't say 25 words yet. It might be a concern, it might not--but for her to say what she said is wrong, IMO. She is undermining/badmouthing your parenting choices (vaxing and dietary choices and socialization) and blaming those things on why your son is not talking yet. She doesn't sound like a doctor who fits your family/parenting style at all.

scatterbunny said:

Wow. I would find another ped. JMO.

My friend's 26mo that I babysit doesn't say 25 words yet. It might be a concern, it might not--but for her to say what she said is wrong, IMO. She is undermining/badmouthing your parenting choices (vaxing and dietary choices and socialization) and blaming those things on why your son is not talking yet. She doesn't sound like a doctor who fits your family/parenting style at all.

Click to expand...

no she doesnt fit us at all , we had a great pediatrician who was great , she never forced anything on us and encouraged the breastfeeding,co sleeping,no circ..etc. then DH's job switched his insurance and we got stuck with this lady who apparently knows everything..i told DH we are not going back to that lady and he needs to call his company ASAP and find a new one...she told me its like i go against the grain on everything.

You definately need a new ped. I would also write to the owner of the practice and tell them exactly why you're leaving. She has no right to question your parenting choices.

Mom To 3 Knuckleheads said:

no she doesnt fit us at all , we had a great pediatrician who was great , she never forced anything on us and encouraged the breastfeeding,co sleeping,no circ..etc. then DH's job switched his insurance and we got stuck with this lady who apparently knows everything..i told DH we are not going back to that lady and he needs to call his company ASAP and find a new one...she told me its like i go against the grain on everything.

Click to expand...

You might have better luck with a family physician, too. We use to go to the only peds office that was affiliated with our hospital (there's a bigger peds office in town, but it's affiliated with the other hospital in town). There were 2 doctors - a husband & wife team. Everyone else that goes to them loves them and we hated them! It was like they didn't listen and didn't give us enough credit as the parents! We ended up finding a wonderful family practice that we all go to now. They are SO wonderful, so much more family oriented and they actually listen to us! Like one time, our doctor said to me, "well, I really think it's just a virus, nothing to worry about, but what do you think? You're her mom, after all, do you think we need to run some more tests?" And I was so shocked that she actually asked my opinion, I sort of sputtered out an answer like, "ummm... no... I think you're probably right... it's just a little cough...umm... but I just wanted to have her checked out before the weekend."
As far as your DS's speech goes, I wouldn't worry about it as long as he is saying some words and learning new words or trying to say new words. All kids develop differently, and he's still very young! Especially when there are older kids in a household, the baby doesn't need to talk because the older kids do it for him! So, it's pretty normal for the youngest to not talk as early as the oldest did. I hate those questions, anyway, when the doctor asks and you start trying to count up (in your head) every little word he has ever said! Definitely don't worry about it!

Don't listen to her... That's a shame that she's saying that about his speech, plus all the other things. I have two friends right now with toddlers - 15 months and 18 months. Neither one of them says very much at all - I think maybe a few words but they mostly point/gesture. But there's nothing wrong with them. Children learn speech at different rates. I wouldn't worry about it all. I'm not a Speech/Language Pathologist, but I am a School Psychologist. I wouldn't worry about it if it were my child. But I'd find a new pediatrician...

AJ had maybe 5 words at 18 mos, but comprehended well. He was very physical though and could jump early etc. He learned an insane amount of words from 18-24 mos. He started putting 2 and 3 words together at 2.5. Evan otoh has been speaking in sentences for a long time, but still can't jump at 2.5.

Wanted to add that the two toddlers I mentioned above are both the youngest of three kids as well. I think when there are so many others talking, the little ones just listen alot...

The boys i take care of are about 17 months so not 18 months yet but they do not say 25 things. Jack trys to repet what i say but i would not call it a word. And drew says almost nothing. He says Bye and Baby and almost nothing else. He will make sounds like animal sounds and he signs with me. The doctor also says he is a little behing and to work with it but not to get too stressed about it yet. Do you have any kinds of classes for kids near you? i have a music class with the kids and used to have a signing class.

I changed to a family doctor at 3 because my mom hated my doctor.(chicken pox does not cause a 3 year old to have a leg the size of your overweight mom's leg) he thought there was nothing wrong with that. I think you should try a family doctor.

I'm pretty sure DS didn't say 25 words at 18 mo, but now here's a regular blabbermouth at 30 months...
My ped's rule of thumb is 18 words at 18 months, but some little ones are short of this (the "strong silent type", lol). As long as they understand language (without visual cues) and can communicate their needs, I don't think there's anything to worry about just yet.
Regarding play groups, I remember from linguistics class that children benefit more from contact with adults and older siblings (who have more advanced language skills than toddlers), strictly from a language perspective. No valid reason for pushing same-age play groups.
So, I would take your ped's comments with a grain of salt... and perhaps look for another one?

Jackson had NO words at 18 months and NO non-verbal communication and my pediatrician told me not to worry, that larger babies were slower. He has now been diagnosed with ASD. I talked to the Behavior Speacialist and she said the important thing was some form of comunication, verbal or non-verbal is fine, and that all children vary in their abilities, but that NO communication is not normal.

My almost 21 month old doesn't say 25 words yet! Not even close. She was born a little early at 35 weeks.

She is being followed by Early Intervention. Since your son was premature he might be elligible in your state as well. They send out questionaires every few months that ask developmental questions. She is behind in her speech but they aren't worried yet since she is normal or above average in everything else.

Her pediatrician is even less concerned. I think she said that the minimum they look for at 18 months was 5 words. (not 100% sure - so don't quote me on that one!)

I ditto finding a new pediatrician. Have you considered seeing a Family Practice physician? They tend to be more accepting of less mainstream parenting. Editted to add that after reading the whole thread, I see I'm not the only one who thinks a FP doc might be the way to go for you.

AdventureMom said:

Wanted to add that the two toddlers I mentioned above are both the youngest of three kids as well. I think when there are so many others talking, the little ones just listen alot...

Click to expand...

absolutely... and then when they begin to talk, they advance quite rapidly.

i was THREE YEARS old before i spoke more than about two dozen words and uttered my first semi-coherent sentence. i had three older siblings who doted on me day and night; i didn't have to speak to get whatever i needed. there was no such thing as early intervention back then. my parents just worried and thought i'd be mute, but in the end i just had to be ready.

One of my BILs didn't say two words before he was 4 years old - then he started talking in complete, grammatically correct sentences.

FWIW, Joyjoy only had 30 or so words at two, but was precocious with her gross motor skills, and shape/color recognition.

If you're concerned about his language, get him in with early intervention through your local children's hospital. A little speech therapy never hurt anyone, and I credit Gregory's 3 years of ST with him reading at 4. (The Christmas before his 5th bday he sounded out the word "mutant" from one of dh's sci-fi books. )

Here is a good chart http://www.childdevelopmentinfo.com/development/language_development.shtml

A child should have 50 understandable (not perfect) words by their second birthday. Many, probably most, kids have more, but that is the minimum. Just like walking, toddlers develop speech at different rates.

It is fairly commom for older siblings to talk for younger siblings, so sometimes parents will need to mediate that so that the littles get a chance learn to talk for themselves.

I don't have a child that old yet but *hugs* Mama, I have some reassurance for you.

When I started school (4 here, we do two years of Kindergarten in Canada), my brother was just shy of 2 and he had no words that he used on a regular or even semi regular basis... In fact our babysitter (whom we were with 40+ hours a week because Mom was a single parent working full time) had never heard him speak. Communicate? Yes, but no words.

Then I go to school. All of a sudden the kid has nobody to talk "for him" and he learns to talk.

With him being the youngest, it's most likely that he has other people to do the talking "for him" and his personality could be like my brothers which was laid back and OK with that.

It sounds like there is a wide range of normal, and your son is in it. *hugs* again Mama!

Kids don't learn to talk from other kids. They learn from their parents. Dr. Stanley I. Greenspan's research comes to mind.

If it were me and I did feel like my child wasn't developing his/her vocabulary quite as well as he/she "should", I'd simply pop him/her in the sling a couple of times a day and make a deliberate effort to interact with him/her. Spend more time reading stories or playing little games with him. When you've got more than one kid, it's easy for the easiest going one to get pushed to the "back burner" sometimes. Squeaky wheel gets the grease, etc. ;-)

If it turns out to be a true developmental delay, putting your kid in a classroom where the child/adult ratio is 8/1 isn't going to help.

All that aside, your doctor's lecture was totally unprofessional, and I'd be looking for a new one if it were me. My kids go to a general practitioner/family practitioner, and that works very well. When Eva was 9-10 months old, we went to see this doctor for our physicals so we could go to Germany (military requires exams). Eva nursed to sleep while Roman was getting his exam done, and when I went to put Eva down on the table for her exam, the doctor said I should just hold her and she'd work around me. I went back to the same doctor when we got back from Germany, and when I told the nurse I was "still" breastfeeding my (then) 2 year old, she thought that was cool. She was breastfed until she was 3 years!

Got a little rambly there. Sorry about that. ;-) The other thing I wanted to add is that, in general, DOs tend to be more "holistic" than MDs. My family doctor is a DO.
DO vs. MD: What's the Difference?
D.O. or M.D.? Issues to Consider

From what I've seen and heard, there is a certain age when kids generally talk in complete, nearly proper, and understood sentences. Let's call it kindergarten. Some kids need more "practice" to get to this point, others just skip the practice, wait a little longer to put their thoughts together, and then just go for it.

Piper had a dozen words or so at 18 months, I can't remember. But she could sign 30 or so. She was putting together two, three, and four word signing sentences. But at 18 months she put together her first two verbal words. "Bye, Papa." I didn't stress in the least. She was communicating and she comprehended everything. And when she did start talking it came very quickly. And now it doesn't stop.

Who said you can't wait for your kids to start talking, then when they do you can't wait for them to shut up? LOL

I also think that personality has a lot to do with it. There's a little girl in Piper's playgroup here who is the exact opposite of Piper. Her birthday is August 19 to Piper's July 26, so just over three weeks apart. When we got together as a group the kids were seven months old. Piper was cruising and climbing. The other kids laid on their backs and watched the ceiling fan. Piper was walking at 11 months, running not too long after that, jumping within a few months, and climbing EVERYWHERE by a year. But she didn't utter two words together until 18 months.

The other little girl didn't move until she was 14 months. She barely crawled. Literally a lump. A cute one, but a lump. She would watch as Piper zoomed by. She didn't learn to jump until she was over two years old. She still doesn't climb at all. But at 14 months she was putting together clear sentences.

Now at 4.5 Piper is a stronger climber/athelete and the other little girl is a stronger speaker, but they're not lightyears apart like they were. They're just like any other two people who have their strengths and weaknesses. It sure was amazing to watch them grow up together. I love that group. We've been meeting once a week for four years.

Wendy