Mad at my mom

longstocking · Sep 24, 2010

I have a lot on my mind today. I really want to complain to someone who will fully understand.
Yesterday my mom was watching my two young boys for a little bit.
She wanted to run to the store for a few things. The car seats were not at her house (and they don't work in her car anyway)
The 1 year old was asleep, she left him. She put the 2 year old on the seat next to her and went to the store. I came home just as she pulled in.
Her excuse...it was only 5 or so miles away.
I am trying so hard to see if from her point of view. She meant well. I know 'back then' times were different and she's not used to the child laws, etc.
I am just grateful she got lucky. I almost wished she had been ticketed, almost.
I love my mom dearly. I just don't know how to handle this situtation. We will be living with her until the end of the year.
I already talked to her yesterday about how I felt. The boys can only been in the car seats, most accidents happen within 5 miles of home, etc.
Just thankful all turned out okay. I'm pretty sure she won't do it again, especially since I started crying (which I know was silly, but I was feeling emotional).
Thanks for letting me gripe.

Louisa · Sep 24, 2010

wait wait wait, she left your one year old home alone?!?!? That is a huge problem, like if i were you she would not be watching my children for a verry long time.
and to put a 2 yo in a car with no seat at all.... he almost would have been safer at home alone (i kid, sorta

)

BookMama · Sep 24, 2010

I'm not usually one to jump in the "I would NEVER ... " camp. But you're saying she left your 1YO home alone, and put your 2YO in the front seat, without a car seat? (Was he even in the seat belt?) Even if the store was 5 miles away, she must have been gone for at least 20 minutes. Wow, that shows such a lack of judgement that I would never feel comfortable leaving them with her again.

Ever.

Mommy0608 · Sep 24, 2010

BookMama said:
I'm not usually one to jump in the "I would NEVER ... " camp. But you're saying she left your 1YO home alone, and put your 2YO in the front seat, without a car seat? (Was he even in the seat belt?) Even if the store was 5 miles away, she must have been gone for at least 20 minutes. Wow, that shows such a lack of judgement that I would never feel comfortable leaving them with her again.

Ever.

Couldn't have said it better. I'm so sorry you had to go through that! I would have been crying hysterically.

skylinphoto · Sep 24, 2010

HOLY CRAP! I would have been crying too. I also would have been saying things that I cant even begin to say on this board. If she were my mom, she would never ever watch my children alone again. Ever.

msg221 · Sep 24, 2010

I also was thinking the same thing; did you really mean that your mother left the baby home alone?

And yes, she is lucky nothing happened to or from the store with your 2 year-old.

Ever since I've taken my godchildren and grandchildren on weekends, I try to be so careful with them. I just cannot imagine taking them in the car without being in their car seats. I can't imagine taking that risk with someone else's children because I know if something happened to them because of something I did that could have been prevented, I'd never be able to live with myself.

Maggie · Sep 24, 2010

Ok, wait.

You can't possibly mean she left the baby home, alone?!

That almost shocks me more than the 2 year old without a carseat.

Someone who shows lack of judgment like that would never be allowed to watch my children. Leaving a baby home alone is just, wow. I just, wow. I don't know what I would have said to my mother.

4boysmom · Sep 24, 2010

She "ran to the store" that is 5 miles away to "get a few things". A trip like that will take 15 minutes if not more at the very least if there is no getting side tracked. For me a trip to "get a few things" can easily turn into an hour. If that baby had woken up...

I mean you talk about CIO, baby crying for 20 plus minutes wondering where the hell grandma is because he woke up and is half asleep still and scared. I would have ripped granny a new one. And then you have the car seat issue...

annb · Sep 24, 2010

My Sienna was totaled less than 2 miles from my house.
I'm glad your kids are ok.

keri1292 · Sep 24, 2010

Mom would never watch my kids again. The house could have burnt to the ground while the baby was home alone. They could have been in a minor collision in which the air bag went off and killed your 2yo. Neither happened, but they COULD have. Your Mom doesn't sound responsible enough to watch the kids. Does she have any medical issues that would make her think that either of these things was OK?

Qarin · Sep 24, 2010

keri1292 said:
They could have been in a minor collision in which the air bag went off and killed your 2yo.

Which would have really delayed getting home to that 1 year old.

glockchick · Sep 24, 2010

My kids would never be alone with her again. Never, ever, EVER leave a baby alone. That one alone would do it for me.

Athena · Sep 24, 2010

I am in shock just reading this. She left your baby home alone? She drove your 2 yo without a car seat? I can't imagine anyone not crying. You had just found out that your children's lives had been in danger. Of course you cried. Honestly, I would never speak to my mom again if she did this. I know how severe that may sound, but she risked your childrens' lives for a trip to the store. And even though they survived, what if CPS (child protective services) found out? I'm so sorry this happened to you and that you cannot move out sooner. I am very glad your children are okay. You were not silly for crying and are completely justified for being upset.

ConnorsMommy · Sep 24, 2010

Wow! Your mom left the 1 year old at home, then took your 2 year old without a car seat and let him ride in front? If that happened to me I'd be furious!! How could she think that was safe? Yes, when she had toddlers, that was acceptable, but there are many kids that didn't get to grow up because of it. I don't know if I go as far as never speaking to my mom again if she did that, but I know I wouldn't trust her to care for my son without me there for a long time.

jess71903 · Sep 24, 2010

There is no "seeing it from her side." Any number of tragic things could have happened and she would be responsible. I too am hesitant to say things like "she would never be left with my children again" but this....wow...NEVER EVER!

ericarizo · Sep 24, 2010

No she did not mean well.. She put your children's lives in serious danger.. My mom took my now 15yr.old once in the car without a carseat when she was watching him and she never watched him again... Period... There is absolutely no excuse for what she did and you should not have to see it from her point of view and you should not feel grateful either. If she cannot follow your rules then she should not be able to care for the kid's..

longstocking · Sep 24, 2010

In regards to the 1 yr old. Her excuse, he usually more than likely sleeps 2 hours sometimes more. She said people were home. My dad - mowing the lawn. My druggie sister, asleep. That doesn't count as people!
I know it will take a while, if ever, to forgive her. She knows better. She raised 8 kids for crying-out-loud.

NannyMom · Sep 24, 2010

longstocking said:
In regards to the 1 yr old. Her excuse, he usually more than likely sleeps 2 hours sometimes more. She said people were home. My dad - mowing the lawn. My druggie sister, asleep. That doesn't count as people!
I know it will take a while, if ever, to forgive her. She knows better. She raised 8 kids for crying-out-loud.

Just wondering, why does Dad mowing the lawn not count as people? Unless, she didn't tell him she was leaving and 1yo was sleeping. What do single parents do when they need to mow the lawn?

APmama2MAK · Sep 24, 2010

If he went to check on the baby I guess thatd be okay IMO, the house hopefully wont burn down with him right outside, but if him being outside mowing the lawn meant my baby ended up screaming for a while because of it, I would be sooo angry. I am a single mom and I mow the lawn while my child is awake, playing on the deck. Too young to stay on the deck then there needs to be a barricade or playpen or something.

I normally would trust that I could watch them while they played but I know someones 2 yr old who just got ran over by a push mower and lost a leg with TWO adults right next to him. One pushing and one walking with the kid. I have NO idea how it exactly happened because I wasnt there but it really surprised me that it was possible.

To make this extra long, my neighbor is a SAHD and he puts the baby in the exersaucer outside with ear coverings on (looks like shooting ear coverings they are really big on her lol) and checks on her and plays with her every 2-3 lines.

ketchupqueen · Sep 24, 2010

Yeah, like I told you yesterday-- she would never be alone with my kids again. Ever.

Mad at my mom

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