I just did something I know I should not have

I felt I had no other choice.. I was waiting out side for Fiona at the preschool, and there is a girl who was leaving with a sitter, she had a scenera set up to ff.

The woman was chatting with me then got the seat and went to install it while we talked.. she was so LOST, she had it in the center and was trying to pull both side belts through the belt path.. it was all over the car.. she finally looked at me and said "do you know how to do this cause I have no clue what I am doing here.

So I tried to show her how to install it and have her try but honestly she was so confussed and with like no time for me to go over it with her, I ended up doing it for her.. I know it was wrong I let her know I am not a tech..I told her she should definitly go to a tech (gave her a couple names) to have them show her how to do it for next time she picks the girl up.. if we had time I would have just told her what to do and waited while she did it herself but she just really was not understanding what I was telling her I guess (the whole locking of the seat belt was confussing to her.. )

I feel so wrong though.. like I just installed someone elses seat for them which I likely should not have done since I am not a tech.
Don't bash me please.. but what would you have done? honestly for next time just in case.. I just Didn't know how else to get this girl home safe in the 3 minutes we had till dismissal.

I so will not bash you.

No bashing here either. This has been a common go-round here, with people on both sides. I stand firmly in the camp thinking that it's really no different than asking help from someone for anything else. And technically, car seats are supposed to be something the average parent can handle anyways. I don't see it any differently than a parent asking for my help putting together a crib or other piece of baby equipment. Yes it has the potential to affect a child's life - but if I ask someone to help me to do something I am putting trust in them knowing they're not an expert.

I mean I did it for super CLOSE close friends a few times, but that is different... we were out side getting ready to go some where setting cars up and I just did it.. and both these girls are like my sisters.. but the reason I feel bad about it this time is because It was just someone waiting out side with me that I was making small talk with.. she goes up to get the seat, brings it out and was just beyond lost.. I had never seen anything like it.. I kept saying in my head " look away Meghan" then she looked up and asked if I knew how to do it, cause she was so lost, and I just couldn't not help her out.. she looked so desprite and she said she just wanted to get her to her house safely. (poor scenera had some major harness twisting ect.. I tried to work some of that out real quick after the install but really there was no time to really fix it properly.)

No bashing here either. I have done the same thing a time or 2 myself. I did it with a woman outside of BRU awhile back. She had custody of her grandkids & had absolutly NO clue what she was doing. I told her I would help her. I felt SO much better about helping her then leaving her to do it herself. She left with the knowledge to do it & to go to tech. One she installed, the other I installed.

I think you did the RIGHT thing here. Letting her go home with potentially deadly installation, you would have never let yourself forget it. You would always say "why didn't I just help her?"

Good for you! And let's hope she gets someone to teach her how to install it for next time.

I helped people before I was certified. As long as they know you are NOT certified, I view it the same as PP. Someone asked me how to use their Bjorn one time. Would I say, I don't know, NO. I'd try to help them out and I'd hope someone would do the same for me.

Good job mama!

I am just thinking..what if you hadn't helped? KWIM? I think (from the sound of it) The child is much safer having you install the seat. I hope she does seek help in how to install a seat though.

you guys are making me feel soooo much better.. I was really not sure what to think.. like the whole drive home I was going "omg what if she crashes and with those twisted straps is hurt and they blame me for the child getting hurt.. but then again.. what if she crashed with the seat installed center by two side belts un locked, sliding all over the back seat.. I mean the seat is rock solid seat belt installed on the passanger side now.. the woman said she wanted her in the center but there was no seat belt there soo I simply told her that was not possible cause the belt she used had to be for the exact seat that the car seat was in. I gave her the really fast run through after I did it sadly that was all I could do.

Yeah - I think any good Samaritan law would cover you for your actions... that child was clearly safer then he/she would have been if they had gone in the car without your help...

Sometimes we have to do what's right... and not worry so much about liability. But clearly you told her to go to a tech... so hopefully she will.

speaking of unsafeeeeeee.. my wild 2 year old opened his chest clip today while I was driving!!! Fiona starts screaming "MOMMY Nolan just unbuckled himself!" I found a parking spot as fast as I could on main st while a biker crossed the st and other cars got in the way .. I am such a freak I yelled out the window at the biker who had put his hand up to tell me to stop.. I was like "I just want to pull into a spot asap, my kid just unbuckled his car seat!"
he rolled his eyes at me lol

capeKO71 said:

Yeah - I think any good Samaritan law would cover you for your actions... that child was clearly safer then he/she would have been if they had gone in the car without your help...

Sometimes we have to do what's right... and not worry so much about liability. But clearly you told her to go to a tech... so hopefully she will.

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I am bringing her Colleens info on monday, and Also told her about a great tech at a local AAA that I know. so hopefully she will go to one of them I even toyed with the idea of sending her to the precinct they are TERRIBLE over there but he would have at least done what I did for her and maybe had time to show her better than I did

I probably would have done the same thing. And I've never installed a scenera but at least I know the basic rules. I know I shouldn't but how could I not help????

I think you did the right thing, absolutely. You took a situation that you KNOW was unsafe and made it better.

From a legal standpoint, it is a tough call, because when you install someone's seat for them, they could sue you if there's a crash and something happens. States' laws vary, but *in general*, my understanding is that good samaritan laws are designed to protect people who have some sort of expertise (like a CPST), and not average people who are just trying to help. So the law doesn't necessarily protect you at all if you are sued.

That said, I hope that people aren't deciding whether or not to help me based on whether or not I might sue them! I think you handled it well.

As a non-tech, you're probably in a better position to do what you did than a tech would be.

You're not an "expert" and you didn't volunteer/advertise your services. A tech has more room for liability because we're supposed to know what we're doing to the point that if we mess up, it's negligence. If you do, it's just an honest mistake.

(Please note that I'm speaking in generalities here. You might very well be more informed than many technicians.)

As a tech, I wouldn't do what you did just because the risks are higher. As a non-tech, I absolutely would have. (As a tech, I would have helped, of course, but would have had her do the install.)

Now, if they get in a crash and the kid gets hurt, can she sue you? Of course. People can sue over anything. But it's not something I'd lose a moment of sleep over.

Given that the sitter obviously had NO idea what she was doing I think you did the right thing by helping her. Ideally, yes, she would have installed the seat... but you made her well aware of the fact that you weren't a tech, told her what she needed to do to get the seat checked, and made sure that the little girl got home safe. As long as I made it well aware that I was not a tech, and that she needed to go have the seat checked, I would do the same thing to ensure that the child got home safe in a situation like that. It's not like the seat was just a little loose or something, she truly had no idea how to put it in safe.

See, I don't think there is anything at all wrong with what you did.
Just because a professional or "certified" position EXISTS for a certain skill, does NOT mean that friends can't still help each other out.
Just because I'm not a professional plumber does not mean that if my friends toilet gets clogged, and I have a lot of experience unclogging toiulets, I have to tell my friend "call a plumber" instead of HELPING her.
Just because professional lactation consultants exist and I am not a certified one, does not mean i can not SHARE my breastfeeding knowledge with other new moms.
Just because mechanics exist and my good friend's dh isn't a certified one, does not mean he can not change my oil for me, or my spark plugs, or my air filter, to help me out.

When did we get so far entrenched in a culture of "professional" status being the only thing that matters, and good old-fashioned neighborliness and generousity is suddenly something to be afraid of, to be avoided, to be held in mortal fear of freaking being SUED?

I help people all the time. I'm sure you could interpret various things I do for friends or family to be considered nursing, medicine, the practice of law, counseling, accounting, computer repair, construction, hell - even cosmetology.

As long as someone doesn't hold themselves out to be something they are not, there is no fraud. No intent to harm.
Maybe the next time my sister calls asking about some rash on my nephew, or pooping problems, or teething issues, I should tell her to call her doctor, because I'm not a doctor and I can't give out medical advice. Sheesh.
In fact, I'd say basically all the threads in the medical section, as well a huge number in the other comunity forums, need to be deleted, we wouldn't want to site to be sued because someone came on here, asked about their kids behavioral problems, or school problems, or medical problems, and then talkes the advice someone gives them on here, and it doesn't work, and then they SUE.
Or you know, we could grow up and say that if you choose to take the advice of someone you DON'T KNOW who is NOT claiming to be a professional in that area, then maybe, just maybe, you do so at your own risk.

There is a big difference between the average parent, and you. So go have a dvoe bar and relax.

I would have totally done the same. I know I should be worried about being sued and all but honestly I'm not. I know what I'm doing and I see the good in people, it would be a really crappy person to sue me for trying to save their child's life.

I've done worse... At my technician class clinic no less..

Judi said:

There is a big difference between the average parent, and you. So go have a dvoe bar and relax.

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mmmmmmmmmmmm dove barrrrrrrrr..... if my pants were not fitting so tightly I would do so.. but I am afraid I will just stick with coffee and relax lol, I really do not consider myself even close to the average parent when it comes to car seats, BUT... I know that I have no official certification to actually help people.. can I just walk around calling myself a car seat expert lol ?

If I had time to become certified and a sitter to watch the kids while I took the course I surely would do it.