Turned my micro-preemie niece FF'ing today at 16mths.

I love my SIL. She is an awesome Mother, and has always been very much wanting to do what's best for her daughter. I admire here a lot, and think highly of her. Niece was born at 28 weeks, and has done well ever since :thumbsup:

SIL knows about extended rear-facing and kept her rear-facing this long. She has a Britax seat, and a Chicco Keyfit both based off of my recommendations.

She called me to tell me she was ready to turn niece, and that she seemed unhappy rear-facing. She wanted to know my opinion about it, and if I thought she was purposely endangering her daughter by putting her FF'ing. I honestly didn't know what to say to her, so I just told her it was her decision.

I did mention to her that I wanted to install her seat FF'ing, and that if niece is properly installed (top tether in use, straps tight, car seats installed correctly, etc...) then I would be ok with her FF'ing.

Apparently I have changed (me who had my 4 and 6 year old rear-facing). I have realized that this is NOT my child, and NOT my decision and all I can do is make sure she is properly restrained in a 5 point harness, which she is



Niece and I the other day

Aw she is adorable.

Um, yay, I guess. She's certainly a cutie pie!

At 16 months I would still try to convince her to ERF especially if she is asking for your opinion. She is still so young.
PS
She is adorable.

I was just looking at DD2 earlier and thinking how I couldn't possibly see her FF yet, and your niece looks smaller than her. If she asked your opinion, you should give her your honest opinion, maybe she is really wanting a reason to not FF yet, I don't know. I wouldn't hold back since she ASKED you.
:twocents:

I usually share that "2 is the new 1" at a minimum to rearface and show the [ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fKIeExpDLDA"]Forward v. Rearface Crash Video[/ame] --that usually convinces people to Rf as long as possible. I add that I still Rf my 3 year old.

However, you are correct that the choice is ultimately up to the parent.

Trust me, she knows how I feel about it. I think she already had her mind made up about it, and admittedly is hesitant to do it, but I think she wanted me to make sure she was correctly restrained while FF'ing.

She has google, she can look up the info herself like she does everything else.

Many months ago I had sent her links regarding ERF.

Not much I can do about it. When she rides with me though, she will be rear-facing.

I would rather SIL (and anyone else) feel comfortable enough to come to me and make sure her/their car seat is installed correctly and her daughter is "safe," than feel like I am going to look down on her choice and give her an "earful." My mission is accomplished, imo, that she felt comfortable enough to ask me about it. That's the kind of technician I want to be. If it had been a parent that had no idea anything about ERF I certainly would have provided more info and maybe pushed the issue a bit more.

It's always so frustrating to me when those who have and know all of the info, and are well-aware of the risks they are taking, are still willing to take those risks with their child's life. I don't get how anybody can know all of that and just shrug. It makes me sad.

That said, good on you for being the kind of tech who will accept that the parent has made the educated decision to FF, and have peace with it. That takes some major skills, the kind I don't have. Most of the time, I wish I did. (My response to her question about purposefully endangering would probably have been an emphatic 'yes'... far less diplomatic and tech-proper than "it's your decision.") I'm glad you're able to be the kind of tech you want to be.

Carrie_R said:

It's always so frustrating to me when those who have and know all of the info, and are well-aware of the risks they are taking, are still willing to take those risks with their child's life. I don't get how anybody can know all of that and just shrug. It makes me sad.

That said, good on you for being the kind of tech who will accept that the parent has made the educated decision to FF, and have peace with it. That takes some major skills, the kind I don't have. Most of the time, I wish I did. (My response to her question about purposefully endangering would probably have been an emphatic 'yes'... far less diplomatic and tech-proper than "it's your decision.") I'm glad you're able to be the kind of tech you want to be.

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Very well said. I totally agree. :thumbsup:

I have friends who are the same way... they know very well that rear-facing is safer, yet they make the switch as soon as possible (sometimes before 1yr/20lb.)

I just wanted to say kudos to you for being so strong!

It took me a long time to come to peace with my brother/SIL turning E at 1/20. And some others in my life who have turned their children sooner than I would have. But I never pushed it on them and they are still comfortable with coming to me for help with seats.

I probably would have told her that as a mother and as her sister yes, you think its endangering her child. That said, you won't bring it up again cause its her decision and you would be happy to help her install the seat ff properly. I would also tell her that you're glad she asked for your help in reinstalling the seat cause her dd will be safer in a properly used seat, no matter which way it faces.

However, good for you for being able to back off! As you can see, I probably wouldn't have which might have caused problems.