I think it is an issue because she worries what other people think a lot, so if some guy starts riding her bumper she increases her speed, then when he eventually goes around her she dcreases it again to where she is comfortable (and other such scenarios). I think this trip I am going to end up talking to her about a lot of things (like putting her purse at her feet, and talking on her cell -hands free, but stiil
-) and I will offer to do the highway driving -I know the highway streeses her out and she wont mind not driving (actually I will probably end up being the driver while she sits in the back with the girls.)
She sounds like a very uncomfortable driver. I can see why you are nervous. When you start suggesting she do all these things differently, I am afraid it might make her even more uncomfortable. If you can take over driving without hurting her feelings, (EX: "I love driving, please let me drive? You should sit back & relax."
) I think that would be best.
If she drives
Purse: I bet she normally puts it on the passenger seat when you aren't in the car and my guess is that she doesn't want to encroach on your space. Maybe try "That has to be so uncomfortable! Let me keep it over here. I have plenty of leg room and I promise to keep it safe."
Cruise control: Even the speeder that pulls up behind her wants her to stay steady. If she doesn't increase her speed, the other driver will probably go around her much sooner. As someone who drives a bit faster than average, one of my biggest pet peeves is when I get behind someone who starts slowly increasing their speed. If they stay the same speed, I have no hesitations to pass, and it's easier.
Cell phone: If it's hands free and she isn't running off the road like she does with the cruise control, I'd let it go for now.
I'm sure you don't want her to think you are judging her and her driving. It's going to be hard to suggest she do things differently without making her think that, KWIM? If she thinks your are watching & judging the way she is driving she may become very distracted.
I have been in one fender bender in 10+ years of mostly city driving. But my DH always insists I am a horrible driver. He grabs the dash and curses about all my "close calls" and I admit, I SUCK at driving & have close calls
when he is in the car. I know he is judging me and it makes me so distracted and nervous that I never drive with him anymore. Please keep that in my mind when you make your suggestions and good luck. I'd be super worried too and would be looking for ways to make the drive safer too!