cruise control and my mother :(

ninejr

New member
I am staying with my parents for a month. I dearly love my mom, but her driving is stressing me out :( She is constantly fiddling with her cruise control and it makes me feel like she is really distracted when she should be focused. (Highway, not in town - they live in a very tiny town so even getting to Walmart takes 30 min. on the Highway)
Do others find this to be true, is cruise control distracting or a problem? DH and I have a zero bells and whistles car that is a standard, so I hadn't even thought about cruise control being an issue. I have only been here 3 days and I offered to start driving yesterday because my babies are in the back and her driving is stressing me out.
 
ADS
I live in a small town as well. Interstate for travel (Wal-Mart 50 miles away) I don't have to look at my steering wheel to know where my cruise control is. It's memorized for me. Maybe she's the same?
 

ninejr

New member
saddly no, she looks down every time :( and twice has ended up on the rumble strip while adjusting it :eek: My dad has where it is memorized and it doesn't bug me when he adjusts it.
 

babyherder

Well-known member
If she's ending up off (or sort of off) the road while adjusting it, its probably not good. I would take over driving.
 

emtb79

New member
My mom hates that cars are equipped with cruise control, because if you start fall asleep your foot eases off the gas pedal. Thats her thoguhts not mine. I tried to use mine and its a pain to use and I find I easily get distracted by using it but I also dont use it often.
 

vonfirmath

New member
Cruise control actually helps my driving when going places where it is appropriate. Because otherwise, my speed tends to vary a LOT.

Fiddling with cruise control is not normally needed.
 

Maedze

New member
I greatly prefer cruise control to 'pedaled' driving especially for long distances on straightways with constant speeds. I do not find that it impairs my driving in any way.
 

kaleigh71

New member
Cruise control actually helps my driving when going places where it is appropriate. Because otherwise, my speed tends to vary a LOT.

Fiddling with cruise control is not normally needed.

Ditto. I kinda have a heavy foot, so it keeps me in check. I don't have to look at all to set mine.
 

Athena

Well-known member
For people who use it regularly, cruise control can become fairly automatic. However, it sounds like that is not the case for her. If it's distracting her and taking her eyes off the road, then you have every right to assert yourself and act on your concerns. You love your mom and I imagine you are concerned for her safety as well. You are there, only you really know if it is a problem in this case, trust your instincts. :)
 

Carrie_R

Ambassador - CPS Technician
I have and LOVE cruise control, I'm very dependent on it, and I feel it makes me a better driver, for a variety of reasons -- including but not limited to not having to worry about creeping up in speed and tiring out less quickly on longer drives.

My current vehicle has it on the wheel, but my van had it on a stalk coming out of the steering column, and for neither did I have to look at it.

If your mom cannot drive and operate the cruise control at the same time, then she needs to abstain from doing one or the other, and yes, you have a right to say that. Doing *anything* (other than accident avoidance) and ending up on the rumble strip is a problem. Having it occur repeatedly should be a warning to the driver that there's a major issue.
 

ketchupqueen

CPST and ketchup snob
Staff member
My husband uses it on long stretches of open highway, etc.; mostly on long trips (being from L.A. ;) ) and our cruise control doesn't seem to be difficult to adjust. If she's having issues with it, she probably shouldn't use it. Of course knowing a parent SHOULDN'T do something unsafe while driving and getting them to are different things... My dad honestly scares me when he takes or makes a call (hands-free, even before it was the law, but still) while driving. But he doesn't even GET that it causes him problems. *sigh*
 

ninejr

New member
I think it is an issue because she worries what other people think a lot, so if some guy starts riding her bumper she increases her speed, then when he eventually goes around her she dcreases it again to where she is comfortable (and other such scenarios). I think this trip I am going to end up talking to her about a lot of things (like putting her purse at her feet, and talking on her cell -hands free, but stiil :( -) and I will offer to do the highway driving -I know the highway streeses her out and she wont mind not driving (actually I will probably end up being the driver while she sits in the back with the girls.)
 

monstah

New member
I think it is an issue because she worries what other people think a lot, so if some guy starts riding her bumper she increases her speed, then when he eventually goes around her she dcreases it again to where she is comfortable (and other such scenarios). I think this trip I am going to end up talking to her about a lot of things (like putting her purse at her feet, and talking on her cell -hands free, but stiil :( -) and I will offer to do the highway driving -I know the highway streeses her out and she wont mind not driving (actually I will probably end up being the driver while she sits in the back with the girls.)

She sounds like a very uncomfortable driver. I can see why you are nervous. When you start suggesting she do all these things differently, I am afraid it might make her even more uncomfortable. If you can take over driving without hurting her feelings, (EX: "I love driving, please let me drive? You should sit back & relax.":D ) I think that would be best.

If she drives
Purse: I bet she normally puts it on the passenger seat when you aren't in the car and my guess is that she doesn't want to encroach on your space. Maybe try "That has to be so uncomfortable! Let me keep it over here. I have plenty of leg room and I promise to keep it safe."

Cruise control: Even the speeder that pulls up behind her wants her to stay steady. If she doesn't increase her speed, the other driver will probably go around her much sooner. As someone who drives a bit faster than average, one of my biggest pet peeves is when I get behind someone who starts slowly increasing their speed. If they stay the same speed, I have no hesitations to pass, and it's easier.

Cell phone: If it's hands free and she isn't running off the road like she does with the cruise control, I'd let it go for now.

I'm sure you don't want her to think you are judging her and her driving. It's going to be hard to suggest she do things differently without making her think that, KWIM? If she thinks your are watching & judging the way she is driving she may become very distracted.
I have been in one fender bender in 10+ years of mostly city driving. But my DH always insists I am a horrible driver. He grabs the dash and curses about all my "close calls" and I admit, I SUCK at driving & have close calls when he is in the car. I know he is judging me and it makes me so distracted and nervous that I never drive with him anymore. Please keep that in my mind when you make your suggestions and good luck. I'd be super worried too and would be looking for ways to make the drive safer too!
 

fyrfightermomma

New member
I feel your pain. My mother is the same way. And she drives with both feet (left foot for brake, right foot for gas) and 90% of the time she is pushing the brake while still giving it gas *sigh*


She also sucks at cruise control and it really takes her eyes of the road

So for the majority of people, cruise is second nature. They can do it without thinking and it doesn't distract them.

For the rest, it is more distracting and they really shouldn't be using it if that's the case.

I have no clue how to let her know though LOL

Hope it gets better soon!
 

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