RF 4+ years old...

mommy · Feb 24, 2010

Just wondering if any of you are rf or have rf your kids once they turn 4+. I get so much grief all the time over my 3 year old still rf. I always say (since he turned 1) we will see his next birthday how he is doing when they say somthing about it and with him turning 4 in June I know that everyone will lose there mind if he stays rf. To me though there really is no question that as long as he is still fitting his rf seat and he is happy to rf, why not, its still safer right?
Sorry this seems like more of a rant but I want to make sure Iam not crazy! He is only a small guy weighting 28-29 pounds so I know by his 4th bday he is still going to fit his seats.
So would you still RF or FF come his 4th bday?

QuassEE · Feb 24, 2010

My daughter turns 5 in May, and a couple of months ago we bought the new Radian XT 2010 and I installed it rear-facing just for the heck of it. We've left it that way. She'll probably hit her 5th birthday rear-facing in it, and then go into a booster pretty soon after.

-Nicole.

aisraeltax · Feb 24, 2010

im not in Canada, but my 4 year old is still RF'ing

Qarin · Feb 24, 2010

Practice this slightly sarcastic phrase: "How is this your problem?"

Or, nicer, "That's interesting, thanks for that. Can you believe the weather we've been having?? Please pass the bean dip."

My oldest DD rearfaced on an off until she was 4y9m, her last RF seat being a Britax Wizard. Nobody really seemed to give much grief, though I'd made kind of clear to the various grandparents back when she was a baby that I would prefer they not talk about which way she faced, since she wouldn't know the difference until and unless someone tried to play up how exciting facing forward was. Still, I have plenty of other parenting practices for which either sarcasm or bean dip has been useful (breastfeeding, homeschooling, shifted sleep schedule, etc), and it is effective.

icnee · Feb 24, 2010

My Naveah is 4yrs 3mo and she is still RFing. for 5-10 minute rides on clear days I let her ride in Isaiahs HBB. But other than that she is rfing.
Here is a couple of pics for you.

simplychels · Feb 24, 2010

I'd still rf him

My DD is just over 3 years old, and 25lbs on the button. FF'ing her at 4 years old will not be an option for us as I will be shocked if shes even 30lbs by then considering shes gained 3lbs total in the past year. My DD is short as well, so shes just small framed and the very thought of a child that small ff'ing, regardless of age, is terrifying to me.

I get the odd comment, a few stares. But I also purposely dawdle sometimes so that people have a chance to see me putting in my 3 year old still rf'ing so they can ask themselves why and either approach me, or search online. Well ok thats probably wishful thinking but hey some might!

eta: my DD does not even realize her seats have the ability to face the front. It is awesome!

selinajean · Feb 24, 2010

Bean Dip! :ROTFLMAO:

I will have to remember that the next time that rear-facing/breast-feeding/co-sleeping/cloth-diapering/delayed-vaxing/babywearing comes up! :thumbsup:

selinajean · Feb 24, 2010

simplychels said:
I'd still rf him

My DD is just over 3 years old, and 25lbs on the button. FF'ing her at 4 years old will not be an option for us as I will be shocked if shes even 30lbs by then considering shes gained 3lbs total in the past year. My DD is short as well, so shes just small framed and the very thought of a child that small ff'ing, regardless of age, is terrifying to me.

I get the odd comment, a few stares. But I also purposely dawdle sometimes so that people have a chance to see me putting in my 3 year old still rf'ing so they can ask themselves why and either approach me, or search online. Well ok thats probably wishful thinking but hey some might!

Guilty of that here too!

I didn't answer the original question either, the bean dip threw me off! (And now I am hungry!)

Nick is 2 1/2 now and still only 26 pounds. He has weighed that much for at least 6 months now. I know that we will easily make it to 3, if not 4 in a RF seat unless he starts pounding back protein shakes. I plan to keep him RF as long as his seat allows, unless driving becomes impossible because of him complaining. He has yet to say anything about it in this seat (he did complain in the AO) and I am hoping that it stays that way. Every time that I buckle him in I ask, "Are you safe now?" and he replies with a big, "yeah!" He doesn't know any different. As your son gets older he may start to question it but you can just tell him that it is safest like that. If he really starts to be bothered by it you can re-evaluate at that point but until then it seems like everything is working out great! :thumbsup:

babygirlsmom1005 · Feb 24, 2010

My DD is 4 years and 4+ months old and RF'ing and will prob. make it to 5 in her RNXT

icnee · Feb 25, 2010

selinajean said:
Bean Dip! :ROTFLMAO:

I will have to remember that the next time that rear-facing/breast-feeding/co-sleeping/cloth-diapering/delayed-vaxing/babywearing comes up! :thumbsup:

Me to.

Alison's Mom · Feb 25, 2010

I would like to have my kids still RFing, but did turn them FFing shortly after their 3rd birthdays. The person who had a problem with it was my DH, who still thinks in terms of the 'turn them around at 12 months' rule, and it was a big issue to keep them RFing until 3, even though they are both short and thin. The kids themselves had no problems with it, and wouldn't have cared one way or the other. DH, however, was being stubborn, and I think it was a matter of him feeling like he didn't get to decide anything about the kids, as I insisted on not circumcising, extended breastfeeding, cloth diapering, co sleeping, etc, and he probably felt like he had no say. Even though all techs would advise putting my kids, especially the 3yo RFing, DH doesn't care, and thinks that I'm being overly paranoid, and refused to look at my research. I chose to give in on that one, as he started getting really immature about it, saying things like 'if you don't turn him FFing, then that's the last time I'm riding in the car'. Terrible, I know, and there are other issues at play, and we need to work on our communication, but that was the best I could do.

You didn't mention who was giving you grief. . . . I'd say if it's grandparents, friends, etc, who aren't the ones raising your child, to do the smile and nod thing, but if it's your DH, it might be harder, since it's also his child, and most people including doctors, etc will tell you to FF earlier than 4.

Adventuredad · Feb 25, 2010

Pass the bean dip!

Rear facing is much safer even at age 4 although the critical stage has been passed. If a child is fine rear facing I don't see any reason to switch to forward facing.

Most parents know very little about rear facing. They know very little about what's safe and what isn't. I find most parents very appreciative over some basic information about rear facing although sometimes it's like talking to a brick wall.

My daughter is 3.5, 40 lbs and 39 in ches. She is RF and will stay that way another year or so. My son, now 6 and FF, was turned at 4+ since he was tall.

Amount of grief will depend a lot on where you live. In some places Rf to age 4 i standard, in other places people will be shocked to see any parent using a car seat for a 12 month old

swtgi1982 · Feb 25, 2010

My DD just turned four and at 33-34lbs and 38in has tons of room in her CA and will stay that way as long as she fits! Heck my only issues have been with my FIL who thinks she should be in a NBB like "his other grandkids were at her age" (they are 18 and 21! times have changed!)

I have my Pedi on my side at least, and she told him so for me

:ROTFLMAO:

Oh yes my almost three yr old is RF too! And at his weight (26lbs) he will be for a long while yet!

babyherder · Feb 25, 2010

I would if I could. I figure if the spine matures between ages 4 and 6 it can't hurt to keep kids rear facing until 6 if I can. Its not possible in a lot of situations (kids outgrow seats) and I don't think forward facing four year olds are not safe but since rear facing is still safer (by however little) why not use it.

canadiangie · Feb 25, 2010

My oldest will be 4 in June and I hope to keep her rf'ing until she is closer to 4.5y/o... we'll see.

finn · Feb 25, 2010

icnee said:
My Naveah is 4yrs 3mo and she is still RFing. for 5-10 minute rides on clear days I let her ride in Isaiahs HBB. But other than that she is rfing.
Here is a couple of pics for you.

Your pictures make me wish my multi tech was red

ds is only 3 years 2 months, he'll be rear facing until he's 4, the only person who has issues with it is my brother. As the rest of my family I just showed them the ff versus rf crash test videos, and asked them how badly hurt they wanted their only grandchild/great grandchild to be in a crash (yes i'm harsh) but I got sick of them telling me he couldn't see & that his legs didnt fit etc. Now they dont say a word

ds is asks quite often if he can turn around, i have just started telling him he can on his birthday (jan

) so far thats working

He is the only one at his kindy rf, but almost all of the 3 year olds in his class are harnessed which is pretty impressive. The culture here is that they go into boosters at 2.5/3, so to see so many kids in harnessed seats is awesome

twinsmom · Feb 25, 2010

My kids are 4.5 and still RF. I'm sorry you're getting such negative comments. I've been lucky about that (well, no one has said anything to my face; don't know what's going on behind my back.

). If RF still works for you and your family, keep RF and ignore the comments (easier said than done, I know!!). And no, you are not crazy!!

birdflippin' · Feb 25, 2010

Alison's Mom said:
I would like to have my kids still RFing, but did turn them FFing shortly after their 3rd birthdays. The person who had a problem with it was my DH, who still thinks in terms of the 'turn them around at 12 months' rule, and it was a big issue to keep them RFing until 3, even though they are both short and thin. The kids themselves had no problems with it, and wouldn't have cared one way or the other. DH, however, was being stubborn, and I think it was a matter of him feeling like he didn't get to decide anything about the kids, as I insisted on not circumcising, extended breastfeeding, cloth diapering, co sleeping, etc, and he probably felt like he had no say. Even though all techs would advise putting my kids, especially the 3yo RFing, DH doesn't care, and thinks that I'm being overly paranoid, and refused to look at my research. I chose to give in on that one, as he started getting really immature about it, saying things like 'if you don't turn him FFing, then that's the last time I'm riding in the car'. Terrible, I know, and there are other issues at play, and we need to work on our communication, but that was the best I could do.

You didn't mention who was giving you grief. . . . I'd say if it's grandparents, friends, etc, who aren't the ones raising your child, to do the smile and nod thing, but if it's your DH, it might be harder, since it's also his child, and most people including doctors, etc will tell you to FF earlier than 4.

Sounds like my DH

If I could, I'd rf as long as possible.

catchthewind · Feb 25, 2010

My daughter is only 2 1/2, but I've never really had any comments yet that weren't just surprise. Like we went to test drive a van and the guy who owned it told me to install the seat on a particular side because it would be easier access to the tethers. I told him I rf anyway so it wasn't a problem and he just expressed surprise but didn't say much more. Same sort of thing I've had from grandparents, etc. We did ff her for about a week in September because my dad was here, it was our only vehicle we had available, and my dad's driving was making her very car sick (and me too unfortunately). But she was over two and I did my best to avoid going in the car at all. And my dad did make a few comments about how it didn't matter either way and we all survived and he thought I was overly paranoid about how the car seat in general, but didn't really give me any grief over it. But like others, we extended breast feed, don't vax, cosleep, etc. etc., and I think my family has just chalked the rf car seat thing up as another crazy thing we do.

I'd like to keep her rf until at least 4, though I don't think she'll make it unless we buy a new car seat for her. After 3 though, if she starts complaining, I'd definitely consider turning her. The only way I think she'd even have a problem though is if other people start saying things to her about it, but if anyone does I'll put a stop to it pretty quickly.

kattale · Feb 25, 2010

I FF'd my daughters way too early, before I knew anything about seats - but I ERF my daycare children.

My policy, on which I stand firm with my parent/clients, is to rear-face to the extent of the seat they have. If the child outgrows the RF limits before the age of 2, I recommend another seat - otherwise, I recommend that they reap the safety benefit as long as their seat allows, regardless of the child's age. If they still fit the seat at age 4, or 5... awesome! After age 2, I don't send them racing out for a new seat if their child hits 30 pounds, but I do mention that it's not uncommon to do so, if they wish.

Please - let us know who these "they" people are.. I'm curious to know who in your life thinks they have the right to put the pressure on. Go ahead and feed them the "bean dip"!

Kat

RF 4+ years old...

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