S/O of Preemies - How About Large Kids?

Jonah Baby · Nov 30, 2009

So the RFing goal for preemies may be longer than that of full term (and developmentally on-track) children for many parents.
How about kids who are just BIG.
Does the goal for you, parents, change when one child is 60% larger than another child?
To what lengths will you go to keep this moose-kid RFing? Harnessed?
Budget and seat availability must come in to play early on, right?
Would importing Swedish seats cross your mind? Happen?
Do you feel guilty that you can only "do what you can" when other children are "safer"?
If a slightly older child of yours was able to RF much longer, but the younger child could not, would you turn both FFing?

Sorry for making everyone think so early in the morning.

Jenifer · Nov 30, 2009

As the parent of a 100 percentile boy, now ten yo (and a Jonah

) I think it is imperative to keep them rf as long as possible. He has a big head, long torso and and I kept hime rf to 30# - - all that was available then. If that noggin went flying in a crash, well I just can't imagine. I really think that if I were in the car seat market today, I would choose a Radian 80SL or XTSL.

carseatcoach · Nov 30, 2009

The goal -- to RF as long as possible and preferably to 4 -- doesn't change with size. RFing is about age more than size. It may not be possible or practical to achieve that goal: even if money wasn't an issue, I wouldn't import an illegal seat except in extreme circumstances (45+ pounds before 18 months, maybe). But the goal doesn't change.

What lengths would I go to? It depends on the child's age. Even though RFing to around 4 is best, I probably wouldn't buy a new $300 seat for a 3.5yo. That's my choice as a parent who has to balance a budget. I'd try to harness to 5. It's a rare child who outgrows a Regent before 5. I wouldn't buy a special-needs seat to harness a child over 4, though I might buy an 86-Y harness to use with a booster.

I would definitely choose vehicles that accommodated Regents and Radians if I had a big kid, even if I didn't otherwise care for those vehicles.

Jennifer mom to my 7 · Nov 30, 2009

If the 40 pound seats had been out when my now 4 year old outgrew her decathlon rf at 25 months, I would have bought one. But, she is long torsoed, so I didn't see the point of trying a 35 pound seat at the time, since really, only the radian would have lasted much longer in height.

NOw, that the new seats are out, I will be buying a 40 or 45 pound seat to continue rear facing my almost 3 year old, and my 13 month old. Almost 3 year old is average size, bit longer in the torso but not much, 13 month old is very long torsoed. In fact, they are close to the same size in torso. I would like to get to at least age 4, but we will see.

unityco · Nov 30, 2009

DS was 30lbs at 9mo. 30lbs was the maximum RF limit in Canada at that time so that's when he was turned FF.

If I had known all that I know now, I would have gone to the U.S. and got one of their 35lb RF seats that would have at least got him to 1yo RF. But without a Swedish seat, I think we still wouldn't have made it to 2 (I can't remember when he hit 40, but he was definitely over 35lbs before 2.

)

Right now, this kid's riding in a booster very part-time because he's outgrown his Radian by height. Thankfully, he still fits in the Nautilus harnessed. :thumbsup:

I certainly do feel bad that I couldn't do as well for my own child as I advocate for others - and it definitely hurts my message when people ask, "well, what did you do?" and I have to tell them how early I turned DS. They can tell me I don't understand how hard it is to RF and older child, because of the mess, or their discomfort, or whatever, and really, never having been there, I don't.

NannyMom · Nov 30, 2009

BabyS is huge. 95th% for height and weight. She's 2yrs younger than Sofi, but will soon catch up in size. My goal for all children in my car is 4yrs RF. For my children, I will buy seats I need to make that happen. I try to have seats available for others I may need to drive. I have a MR that BabyS can use (though she's only 24 pounds now). I feel within the next year we will see more HWRF seats coming out. I may end up with an XTSL, but maybe not.

If it ends up that my 4yr ols is RF, and 2yr old BabyS is FF, I will feel terrible. I will stress the concerns to her mother. But If I dont have a seat to accomidate her, I'm not sure I could buy one for her (though I may).

rodentranger · Nov 30, 2009

My goal is to keep them as safe as possible as long as possible while keeping my current budget in mind.

To what lengths will you go to keep this moose-kid RFing? Harnessed? I bought a TF for two more lbs for ODS because at the time, 35 was the highest rf limit on US seats. Then they MR came out a few months later and I was mad. Once he hit 35 lbs, I bought the Frontier for the 80 lb limit and high harness height. The Regent wasn't on my short list due to width and the need to still buy a booster for him.
Budget and seat availability must come in to play early on, right?
Would importing Swedish seats cross your mind? Happen? If I couldn't get my kids to at least two, then yes it might happen, much to DH's disapproval.
Do you feel guilty that you can only "do what you can" when other children are "safer"? I don't have the budget to buy a bazillion seats every time a new one with higher limits comes out. I'm also trying to put two sets of seats into three or four very different vehicles. I'd love to have XTSL's for the 45 rf limit, but they just don't work for my situation.
If a slightly older child of yours was able to RF much longer, but the younger child could not, would you turn both FFing? Nope. Each kid is different. My nephew will be rf far longer than my YDS and they often ride in the same car. DNe is 22 lbs at 2 years, YDS is 23 lbs at 1 yr. Can't help that.

April · Nov 30, 2009

Well for an "average" kid, my RF goal would be at least 3, although I would RF to 4 if the child and seats available permitted it. For my youngest chunky monkey though, my goal was "to the limits of the seats I could afford". That meant FF at 16 months when he outgrew the Radian by weight (30lbs in Canada) and the only seat that RF'd higher was the MA to 33lbs, which there was no way I could afford as a single mom at the time. Then the TF came out when he was 22 months and I bought one even though he was then 33lbs and RF'ed him until 25 months when he maxed it out by weight.

So what I'm saying is, when the kid is huge, I do everything I can. I have imported seats from the US for the harness height/weight limit, but wouldn't from Sweden. Now that there are 45lb seats coming out, I would not import for this baby on the way as I can't see him/her hitting 45lbs by age 3.

tiggercat · Nov 30, 2009

I think the goal is still the same, it is just not always as practical. My son was FF before a year (he was 30lbs at 1 year, 40lbs at 2) because our convertible only RF'd to 22lbs and he was pushing the height limits on the touriva and accel which I believe were the only CDN seats with higher RF limits at the time. My daughter made it to 2 years RF in her 30lb RF MA (she hit 30lbs right at 2 yrs). I hope my baby can make it to 3 yrs RF, but if he maxes out the RF limits, so be it.

DahliaRW · Nov 30, 2009

I have tall kiddos with long torsoes. Ds2 has a particularly large head. I figured I'd have to turn him ffing when he hit 33lbs (the limit on his radian) because I just couldn't justify the cost for 2lbs to get a 35lb rfing seat. Then the MR came out, but he was already almost too tall. So I kept weighing him and he stayed around 31lbs. Fortunately, the newer radians and CA came out giving me more options. I bought him a CA and he will rf until he is 4 or until he outgrows it (whichever happens first). Then he will stay harnessed until he is mature enough for a booster. Ds1 did great in a booster at a little over 4, he's a strange one! I don't think ds2 will be ready as early. I won't buy another seat to keep him rfing (I've spend enough) and I know he'll make it to at least 3 and probably 4 in the CA. I have a nautilus as well, so lots of options for keeping him harnessed. He is ffing already in dh's car and the grandparents, simply because 3 CAs is not in the budget. So I keep him rfing in the vehicle he's in the most.

Dd is a lot smaller than her brothers. Regardless, she'll be rfing until 4 (she may even be able to do so in the 33lb radian, otherwise the CA gets handed down when ds2 goes ffing) and harnessed until she is mature enough for a booster and 40lbs (unless she's not 40lbs until like 9 years, which might happen, I'd probably let her in a booster around 6-7 if she's under 40 but over 30).

coleslawcat · Nov 30, 2009

My son is off the charts for height/weight and head. He is 14 months and 32 pounds. He is currently RFing in a MA with a 33 pound limit. We are currently shopping for Radian80SL or XTSL. I can't imagine turning him right now. His huge head makes me think he would be more at risk rather than less. I don't know if that's true or not, but it seems to make sense that a large heavier head would put even more pressure on the spine in a FF crash than a smaller one. I am very grateful there are high RF limit seats now and that we have the means to buy one.

flutie128 · Nov 30, 2009

With DS he RFed until he was 1 because I didn't really know any better and he was almost 30 pounds (the limit of the comfortsport). At just over 3 he went into a booster because he was over 40 pounds and I didn't really have any other options at the time. A few months later I found an affordable HWH seat the nautilus and he went back into that. I plan on keeping DD RFing until the limits of her seat. She is riding in a TF right now at 22 pounds and 33 inches tall. She has plenty of room but I am undecided about buying another seat for her. I would like to keep her RFing until 3 but I might go longer than that.

TXDani · Nov 30, 2009

My 4 year old son is HUGE I couldn't rear-face him now at the age of four unless they had a seat that rf'ed to 65lbs. Haha and really I don't think he would fit...he is one solid child.

Spam · Nov 30, 2009

A is also a solid heavy child with a long torso and big head. We have 2 tfs and rn80 with a 40lb limit. That's it. When he reaches 35 he'll have to turn in two cars. And if I can't get a more upright install with my rn, i don't know what I'll do as I'd like to keep him rfing the longest in my car. He really only has like an inch of growing room in the myride. Ya do what you can and that's the best you can do. Spending nearly $900 on three rnxtsl isn't going to happen.

DahliaRW · Dec 1, 2009

coleslawcat said:
My son is off the charts for height/weight and head. He is 14 months and 32 pounds. He is currently RFing in a MA with a 33 pound limit. We are currently shopping for Radian80SL or XTSL. I can't imagine turning him right now. His huge head makes me think he would be more at risk rather than less. I don't know if that's true or not, but it seems to make sense that a large heavier head would put even more pressure on the spine in a FF crash than a smaller one. I am very grateful there are high RF limit seats now and that we have the means to buy one.

The idea of internal decapitation worries me a lot with a big head, personally.

stephcali · Dec 1, 2009

Well I have a very large almost 3 year old, she hovers between 41-42 lbs. My original RF goal was 2 (because I knew she was going to be big), but I had to turn her FF at 19 months because she was quickly approaching the RF limit on our MA (33lbs). Even if I had bought a new car seat at the time to get her to 35lbs it would have only lasted a couple of months. But as soon as the 45lb limit Radians were announced I knew I had to have one. So now we have a new XTSL and she is RF again. My new goal is to RF to 3, which will be in Jan. so I think I can make it. Anything after that will be just be bonus time

I don't think there is much else I can do to keep her RF, she isn't chubby at all, just solid. She actually hardly eats at all most days, so it is pretty much how she is going to be. My DD2 is also on the big side, but doesn't seem to be quite as heavy as DD1 was so with our new XTSL we should have no problem making it to 3.

Since DD1 is my oldest and I don't have any experience with another child being able to RF longer I have no idea if my "goals" would have been different. I just know that I plan on keeping them RF as long as possible.

I am just so grateful to the few car seat manufacturers who have realized that there are kids out there who will RF in car seats past 35lbs. Especially to Sunshine kids, because even a 40lb seat wouldn't have made us to much past 2 1/2. I feel sooooo much better driving around now with both my kids RF, especially in LA!

Kat_Momof3 · Dec 1, 2009

I agree... the goal would be the same... and how far I'd go would depend on what is doable in terms of budget and what will fit in my car.

S/O of Preemies - How About Large Kids?

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