Vent Family not using car-seats correctly

Beloved · Jun 6, 2015

My nephew, who will be 3 this month was in an expired cosco HBB with harness slots below his shoulders. I offered my SureRide for months before she would use it. When putting her son in she makes comments that I will call 911 if he isn't in right and that she would just rather let him roll around without anything. Then, a few weeks later, she got mad that she was unable to undo the LATCH straps to get it out (I explained how when we installed it). Without actually trying (or asking for help) to get it out she started using the expired seat (that I thought she got rid of) in other vehicles. She said the SureRide wouldn't fit in the backseat of the truck anyways. I helped her loosen the LATCH and take it out so she could just use the seat belt (leaving the top tether attached - which annoyed her). And the seat is completely stained with mud and food. Thankfully the cover can be washed, but

!

I don't have another seat for her to use in the truck and they refuse to buy something else. I should have taken the old seat when I took it out so she couldn't keep using it.

rosey2007 · Jun 7, 2015

Thats a hard situation for you to be in.

CMeMeC · Jun 7, 2015

This is tough.

I have nieces on both sides that aren't safe in their cars. One has asked for help several times...she asked how to use her infant seat when her baby was born and asked me to help them install it. She asked me what seat would be good when she turned one. I have tried to educate them and given them advice when asked. The infant seat was rarely if ever used correctly and baby was forward facing at one in an improperly installed seat.

The other family- state troopers who should know better- started forward facing around 10 months because baby's feet touched the seat and took their older kid out of a seat at 6 because she's a "big girl." They really just don't care about their kids, though.

Unfortunately, there's nothing you can do. You have tried to educate them and even provided a seat. You can't, however, make them care. I'm sorry we have to deal with this!

cookie123 · Jun 7, 2015

Sorry. I understand completely. My own grandchildren are in a scary situation in their dad's car. Their own mother, my dd, is placing 2 of them at risk by refusing to put the rear facer in the back of their Routan. The 11 and 7 year old are using no back boosters back there and the seatbelt fit totally isn't good. I've finally given up. I pray a lot.

jwilliams · Jun 7, 2015

Hugs, everyone. I am glad my brother's kids are so much older than mine (the youngest is 14), because I know they wouldn't listen to any of my RF, harnessing, or booster noise. They followed state minimums at least. As it is right now I don't know how they are getting three people in the back of their 2013ish RAV4 on the rare occasions that they do.

I make sure people know I am happy to help, and try to put child passenger safety on their radar. After that, I kind of let go.

If it were my grandchildren it would be a different story... it makes me so sad when I read about you and your DD, cookie

Beloved · Jun 9, 2015

Thanks everyone. Still trying to come to some solution. I was actually looking at LBB today to see the weight/height minimum. Would it be better for a tall 3 year old to be in a harmony LBB than an expired cosco HBB with straps below his shoulders? I could get it for him for his birthday at the end of the month and take the other seat. My only concern would be that they would use it as his primary seat instead of just for the backseat of the truck. Unfortunately, he is taller than my son who is 9 months older and his torso is also really long or I would let her use either my Scenera or Tribute (my DS still fits in both FF).

bnsnyde · Jun 9, 2015

That's awesome you are trying to find a good solution.

One of our neighbor friends who is 8 just gets in the front seat and off they go...

Really for that I can't do anything, but my daughter was flabbergasted to see it, lol. Last playdate with another friend she raised the booster headrest (was too low) and threaded the shoulder belt through (was not threaded) for this girl. She's a little carseat lady, I guess.

Beloved · Jun 9, 2015

My nieces have been out of boosters since their 8th birthdays and now ride in front. All 4 kids were turned at or just before 1 and the first 3 were in boosters at 3. The only reason the 4th isn't in a booster is because the pediatrician told her the law was 4 years old. It being the law makes her follow it. I should tell her that VA is a proper use state and she is using the expired seat against manufacturer guidelines - expired and he has outgrown the harness.

allibut · Jun 23, 2015

My MIL gave us a super old car seat from a coworker when we were pg with DD1. Once I had researched and understood more, I realized how old it was and wanted to throw it out. We told her about how car seats expire, become unsafe, and you shouldn't use them, she actually asked for it back to keep "in case of emergency!" I really wish I had told her it was too late, it already went out in the trash.

Luckily we got the ILs to buy a new seat for their car, but they still only follow the absolute bare minimum safety rules, like FF at 1, etc. They wouldn't want to make the front passenger uncomfortable by having to slide the front seat forward any longer than legally necessary

Vent Family not using car-seats correctly

Beloved

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rosey2007

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CMeMeC

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cookie123

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jwilliams

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Beloved

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bnsnyde

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Beloved

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allibut

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